our rainy days || yang jungwon

Chapter 5

Jae-in POV

The reason for my crippling fear of thunder stemmed from childhood trauma, cliché but not any less true. One afternoon, I was out with my mother when suddenly she told me she needed to find a bathroom and would be back in just 10 minutes. I waited and waited for what felt like hours, until the sun set.

Afternoon became evening and my mother was still nowhere to be found, so I thought she hadn't found a bathroom and went home first since she seemed to need a bathroom urgently. I traced my steps back, hoping that my mind remembered the way back.

I thought it would be muscle memory, but for 5 year old me, I couldn't seem to remember in the slightest. My mother had told me to stay where I was, but it was almost night time and I couldn't just stand there forever. I knew which house I lived in, I just didn't know exactly which street it was on, so I wandered around the town until I got too tired and ended up sitting on the curb. That was when it started to downpour.

Now imagine you're a 5 year old with nobody around you in the dark while it's raining, not the best circumstance indeed. I only remember being drenched, crying and eventually blacking out in the rain, tired from all the wandering.

It was the next morning when a kind man in his 40s came up and brought me to a police station. Once I got home, My father told me that my mother was gone. While rushing to find a bathroom to avoid her child being alone for too long, she had tried to run through a zebra crossing, but the driver didn't see her in time and she had succumbed to her head injuries from the crash merely 15 minutes later.

Trauma indeed. I was busy feeling sorry for myself, wallowing in self pity, when my mother lost her life. I don't believe I'll ever get past that, despite the old saying that time heals all. I am not healed.

Jungwon POV

Jae-in. How can I describe her ? She's odd really. I remember when I was first paired with her as a seatmate, she was one of the first girls who seemed completely unwilling to sit with me or even be near me, asking the teacher whether she could just stay in her original seat.

I'm usually extroverted but there was something about her that was different and almost scary, so I didn't bother striking up a conversation, especially since she didn't seem to want to be beside me anyway. However, over time we've gotten closer and she's a lot like me in a way that she's indifferent and treats everyone with the same level of respect to where it's polite, regardless of your appearance, popularity or personality. I liked that.

I had written her love letters. It was a first for me, I had never written love letters to a girl before, even as a joke, but it was fun. I liked to sneak back to class once I saw her walk in sometimes, hiding behind the door frame just to see her open the envelope and laugh to herself.

Wake up Jungwon, you have better things to do than pine over a girl, not to mention you can do better than her, says one part of my brain. Although, the other part of my brain KNOWS she's too good for me. It was a Wednesday morning and I was confronted while trying to reach my english textbook in the back of my locker by Park Sooyoung.

I knew she had a crush on me. It was way too obvious but I would never put her in an awkward place by telling her that I knew, it was the gentlemanly thing to just act dumb, especially if you're unable to reciprocate the feelings.

While Sooyoung was screaming her lungs out at me, I saw Jae-in out of the corner of my eye, visibly upset at the scene before her, but I couldn't do anything, I couldn't hit a girl. However, Jae-in soon rushed over to pull me away from a pretty flustered Sooyoung.

We ran across the open courtyard to a staircase in the far east of the school and hid underneath it. It was going to rain. Jae-in seemed to want to explain herself, but suddenly stopped, her eyes widening as the rumble of thunder got louder.

I watched as she shut her eyes tight, shuddering. Wondering if she was cold, I took off my school blazer and draped it over her shoulders.

Jae-in POV

I felt Jungwon's blazer on my shoulders. Did he think I was cold? I had huddled up, knees to my chest. "Oh uh thank you, aren't you cold though?" I muttered out.

"I'll survive" Jungwon replied with a quick smile, to cover up the worried expression on his face which I noticed when I had first opened my eyes.

"I'm sorry about this, I ju-just am not good with storms, they bring bad memories." Nodding along slowly, Jungwon hesitantly came closer, pulling me to his chest. He gently wrapped his arms around my huddled body, placing my head on his chest.

Another crash of thunder came down. I had unknowingly grabbed onto Jungwon's uniform shirt, clenching the material in my fist. Closing my eyes, I focused on his heartbeat. "bom....bom....bom...bom..bom" I wasn't scared, I couldn't be scared, I was with Jungwon and I had to be brave.

I released his shirt from my grasp, smoothing out the wrinkle I had created and tilting my head up to send him an apologetic smile. I saw his eyes. Another crash of thunder. I didn't even blink. I just stared into his eyes, unsure what came over me, it was like his eyes were hypnotic, I didn't even feel scared anymore, I felt completely calm, like a clear sky after a storm.

We stayed like that for awhile, him blinking down at me every few seconds, I don't know why I couldn't stop and just look away. I was trying to read him, since eyes are the windows to the soul, not sure whether he was worried for me, upset over the Sooyoung incident or just concerned that we were missing our first period. Eventually I stopped, leaning into him and falling to sleep, physically unable to keep my eyes open anymore.

AUTHORS NOTE :
hihi ! sorry for the shorter chapter, im quite busy lately so i might only upload on weekends starting now !