The Ink Of Her Emotions

Dont understand

I honestly just dont understand,

Why my tears caress my orbs,

Why an ache burns my chest,

Why a vein throbs in my head,

Why my soul drowns in darkness,

Why my body repels itself,

Not because of anybody

But just because of me!

I honestly dont understand,

Why I have cocooned myself

In to the person I hate,

In to the likes of which ain't bearable,

In to just a body

With a heart beat,

But completely void of

Everything going around.

I honestly dont understand,

Why I always perceive

Only the darkness that envelopes me,

The pain that shatters my being,

The hardships instead of the ease,

And fail to show gratitude

To the One who bestowed upon me;

The light that protects me.

I honestly dont understand,

Why there's the light

At the very end of the tunnel,

But I tend to focus on the eerie silence,

The gruesome dark patches

That life plates towards me.

Instead of looking for a bright future,

I tend to dig in the charcoals of the present.

I honestly dont understand,

Why when I'm high and wild,

And in the depth of myself,

I fail to recognize the blessings

I've been constantly showered with.

And the same does it apply

When I'm in my depths of despair,

Drowning in my world of nowhere.

I honestly dont understand,

Why I tend to be ungrateful,

And cover my heart

With a coat of granite,

Instead of looking forward

At the countless blessings,

And consider myself

A special slave of the All Mighty.

I honestly dont understand ,

Why I fail to get up

Once I'm shoved into the mud.

Why does it hurt my soul

To stand up strong once again,

To bring a change to the better version

Of the little me I knew

To the stronger mature me.

I honestly dont understand

Why I fail to understand

Simple four letters; "Life".

The rollercoaster ride it takes me in,

With bumps and twists

And slopes and steeps..

But pheww, There'd always be a smooth sail

Somewhere out there..

And for that I hope,

No matter where life takes me,

I know my hold is on the rope of Allah

Sometimes stronger

And many a time weaker..

I just hope i could hold fast

To my dheen

No matter where life decides to take me..

[I HONESTLY DONT UNDERSTAND,

WHY MY POETRY IS ALWAYS ABOUT PAIN.

MAYBE I JUST DECIDE TO WRITE,

WHEN MY MIND DRIVES ME

TO THE DEPTH OF CRAZINESS,

AND WHEN LIFE IS ALWAYS THERE

TO TAKE A BIG TOLL ON ME,

FORCING ME TO PEN DOWN

THE WHIRL WIND OF EMOTIONS

MY HORMONES COULD EVER MUSTER!!

(Apologies for that)]

🌻🌻🌻

Well, I'm back here after so very long...

I've something to ask though.. is there any point me updating poems or reminders anymore.. i dont get much of a read or votes anymore.. hope i could reach a wider audience, maybe once i get to open up an instagram account for my writing once i get a phone of my own in sha Allah..

Stay Safe,

Much love, 

Meela

❤