Four Beating Hearts

17 - school

Penelope POV

It's official, my first day back to school has started. Beth's first class was an easy day, it was just introductions and going over the course flow. Luckily for me, the introductions weren't those awful ones where you have to stand up in front of the class. She had a little worksheet for her to get to know us a little better.

It was kind of funny filling out the worksheet because everything on this paper she already knows, but I had to do it otherwise it'd look weird.

My second class was my ceramics class and that was a fun day as well. Ms. Rosemary gave us a little bit of clay and told us to create something that describes your personality. I decided to make the sun, I had the round ball, but took pieces off to add later as the rays. Then I added a smiley face to the front and called it a day. I feel like a sunshine personality describes me pretty well.

I didn't tell Beth this because I didn't want her to worry, but I don't plan on making friends this year. Having friends means they want to go out or come over, and I don't want to do that being a little. My friend I told Ana that was picking me up graduated last year so I don't have her here anymore.

The ceramics class was over and I quickly made my way back up the stairs to Beth's class. When I got back into the senior hallway I saw she was already standing outside the door. She saw me first and was already smiling.

When I got closer to where only we could hear the conversation she looked down and said with a grin, "You can hug me little one." I smiled brighter when she said that and took full advantage of it.

I wrapped my arms around her and she held me tightly. "Go into my office and we can talk. It's just homeroom so it'll be fine." Beth whispered to me as we hugged.

Once we broke away, I made my way into the classroom, surprised to see the students that were already in there. I just walked past them and made my way into her office and shut the door. I dropped my bag by the couch and flopped onto it.

Maybe 10 minutes later, Beth was walking into the office. She chuckled when she saw me. "That's an interesting way to lay on a couch." She spoke and I rolled over quickly.

Beth sat near where my head was and I scooted closer to lay my head in her lap. "How's your first day going honey?" Beth asked sweetly and I smiled at her.

"It's good. I won't lie, I really want to slip once I get home." I told her and she just nodded while running her fingers through my hair.

"That makes sense, and I promise as soon as we get home you can be as little as you want. Just think, only two more classes and one of them is with me." Beth told me and I nodded before getting up.

Beth stood up alongside me and I gave her another hug, "Just two more classes." I whispered back and she kissed the top of my head.

We walked back out to the classroom and I noticed no one was in my desk yet again, so I plopped my backpack next to my chair before plopping myself in it as well. Homeroom didn't last much longer until it was time for me to go to my creative writing class.

I walked over to Ms. Geerling's class and noticed that she stood by her door just like Beth. She greeted me as I walked in and I returned with a polite hello. I picked my seat, similar to in Beth's class, I went near the window, but was not right in front of her desk.

Ms. Geerling came in once the bell rang and introduced herself before she had us go around the classroom and tell her our names and something we liked to do. I literally hated doing this ice breaker crap, so when it finally got to me, I told them my name and that I liked to sleep before sitting back down.

The only thing we had to do was write about one thing we did this summer and make sure to be as detailed and creative as possible. How exactly was I supposed to write that I was physically, emotionally and sexually abused? Deciding not to go down that wormhole, I wrote about how I visited Ana. Still depressing, but it's not as depressing.

Penelope Winston

One thing I did this summer was visit my sister's grave. I was gone all summer when she had passed away, so when I got back, that was the first thing I wanted to do. I remember rushing up the grassy field to her headstone before carefully sitting down in front of it.

I felt the cool breeze hitting my face as I sat and talked to her. I played with the short green strands of grass with my hands to help ease my worries about being there for the first time. A little red cardinal had flown over to a tree that was close by to her headstone giving me a hint of darkness.

My sister always told me that if you see a red cardinal, that it was someone you love that has passed trying to communicate with you. A smile overtook my face when I saw him, because to me that meant my sister was still watching over me.

Getting up and leaving that cemetery, I felt a wave of emotions. I was happy to have been able to see and talk to my sister once more since I was not able to this summer. I was really depressed leaving as well because she had passed when I was gone and I wasn't there for her. This summer was one of the worst of my life, but being able to still "talk" to her makes me feel like she's sitting right next to me.

I finished my writing as soon as the bell rang, so I quickly grabbed my back before dropping the paper onto her desk and making my way back to Beth. Last class.

I smiled when I saw her again and didn't even care if there were people in the hallway, so I gave her a hug. She squeezed me a little tighter and I walked to my desk when we broke away from the hug. I don't plan on hugging her every time I have class with her again, but it's nice knowing she's okay with it. I think it may start to look weird if I do, that's all.