Living with Pain

Chapter 9: In Need of Some Advice

Cash

I can't get Sky out of my head. Even dance practice doesn't distract me. It's not enough to just see her during class. I wish I could go hang out with her, but I'm not sure what to do or say. That never happens. Usually I'm so suave. At least I like to believe that I am. But she's not like other girls who make it so easy. I want to tell her I like her, ask her out on a date, but I'm honestly worried about scaring her away.

I decide I need some advice from someone who knows her better. I shoot Mayson a quick text.

Me: Wanna hang out sometime after school this week and play video games?

Mayson: Sure! How about Tuesday after school.

Me: Sounds great.

I can wait until then to get advice, I try to convince myself. Besides, I'll see Sky again tomorrow at school. Just be patient, I repeat to myself. Damn, how is this girl making me so crazy? I thought I was going to take a break after the last girl that broke my heart, but I guess the universe has a different plan.

--

Tuesday rolls around and I'm surprised when I don't see Sky in class. I discreetly text her as the teacher lectures.

Me: Where are you? You okay?

Sky responds within a few minutes.

Sky: I'm not feeling good today. I'll be fine though. No texting in class!

Worry surges through me.

Me: What can I get for you?

Me: Chicken soup?

Me: What do you need?

She takes her time replying. I start to worry; maybe my questions were too forward. So much for not scaring her...but thinking about Sky not feeling well does something weird to my heart that I can't ignore. I groan. What is wrong with me?? I lunge for my phone when it buzzes again.

Sky: Nah. Just rest. I'm going to try to take a nap. I'll probably see you tomorrow.

Me: Ok. Sleep well.

I try-and fail-to focus for the rest of the class period. All I can think about is Sky.

--

I stare at the messages with Sky's name at the top. I debate about texting her again, now that school's out. I don't want to seem needy, but I can't stop myself.

Me: Class was boring without you. Hope to see you tomorrow.

I put my phone away and drive to Mayson's house. We grab snacks and start up a game of Halo. She's always been like one of the guys to me. A good friend. I wonder how I hadn't met Sky before since I've known Mayson for a couple years, but that's a question for another day.

"Okay, spill," Mayson pauses the game after about an hour of playing. "What's on your mind." When I don't reply right away she continues, "It's about Sky, right? That's what you want to talk about?"

"Yeah..." I stare at the controller in my hand. I don't know why this suddenly became hard to admit. "I really like her," I finally say.

"I knew it!" Mayson squeals. "I'm so excited for two!"

My head snaps up to look at Mayson. "Do you think she likes me too?"

She nods enthusiastically. "I'm sure of it. Even if she's not ready to admit it, she is comfortable with you on a level I rarely see."

I chuckle and run a hand through my hair. "She doesn't seem that comfortable. I'm afraid of scaring her off-that if I tell her how I feel she will run away. That's what I need your advice on. How do I ask her out without scaring her?"

"Hmm," Mayson contemplates my situation. "Well, what you've seen is comfortable for Sky, but I get your point. She may or may not have run away from a guy in junior high when he told her he liked her."

My eyes widen.

"Don't you dare tell her I told you. And don't panic. This is different."

"What if you tell her I like her?" I ask.

"I can, but I think it'd be a lot better coming from you."

I look over at my phone. "I could text her?"

"Yes! That way she has time to respond. And she will probably call me at that point for moral guidance." Mayson looks proud of that fact that she would be needed. "But don't do it today. Maybe give her a day or two to feel better."

"Fine," I sigh. I really want to let her know how I feel so I can know how she feels, but Mayson is right. I don't want to overwhelm her if she's already not feeling well. An idea pops into my head. "Do you think you could convince her to come hang out in the dance room in the mornings? It'd be nice to see her more often and you can use the school musical as an excuse. You need to practice your dances." I really just want to see Sky more often.

Mayson nods like I actually made sense. "Sure can. She may not be happy about changing her morning routine, but we usually just hang out in the drama hall anyways."

"Thank you. You're a great friend."

"You're welcome. Just don't hurt Sky. She doesn't need-" Mayson pauses, "just be nice. And careful with her feelings. She's a sweet girl and I don't want to see her heart break."

"I have no intention of breaking her heart."  

----

Authors Note

I decided I might start throwing in some authors notes because why not. I enjoy reading them in other people's stories, but if you don't, feel free to skip them. No plot changing information will be revealed in a note :)

So, I may or may not have based Sky's shyness off my own. And I may or may not have run away from a boy in junior high because he said he liked me and I didn't know how to reciprocate that feeling appropriately... Social anxiety is so much fun. But now I think back to it and laugh. And hope I didn't crush that poor boy's soul...