MCYT oneshots

Tired

This chapter is a vent written into stories of my favorite block men. There is sort of a ship in this being Wilnobade. Explanation for that is, I have a girlfriend and she plays a small part here. I apologize if you dislike shipping.

TW// Attempted drowning, mentions of suicide

Tired (Technos tired)

Everything hurt, and I was tired. Tired of everything. In the mornings I'd barley get out of bed, I would just try my best to fall back as sleep. I wouldn't talk to anyone and when I would it'd be my close friends. I've been neglecting Wilbur, my boyfriend for a week now. It's not that I don't wanna talk to him, it's the fact that I can't bring myself to face him. God how much I wanted to go back to 2016. I was so much happier then, I had more friends, people actually liked me then, but now it seems they all hate me. When talking to my friends I'd always make self deprecating jokes to mask it all. Every time my boyfriend would ask what's wrong I'd just switch the topic. He's been upset at me for it and I just cried. I can't handle things like that. I'm known as the "Blood god, The blade"! I just can't live up to those names. Everyones expectations for me are high. It feels like I'm constantly being judged in a harsh way for anything, and everything. I can't handle this anymore.

Drowning (High school au)

It was another day, and a horrible one at that. This had been going on throughout the whole week. My mom talking bad about my friends when they made a mistake. Every time she did it hurt, it burned since I knew that Dream was a good friend. She even thought about making me cut all ties with him. It's been like this for the past year. On top of that I haven't been able to talk to my boyfriend for weeks. My grades were horrible so my mothers punishment for that was to take away everything I own. My whole life was just school work for more than 14 hours. I was so burnt out. I missed my friends, my boyfriend. I always would stress draw my thoughts and feelings. Besides all of that I've been in a depressive state. Hell, I was such a fuck up. I keep thinking so negatively about myself. I'd always make comments on my ability to learn, my body, my weight, height, face, everything. I felt so sick of it all. I have tried drowning multiple times. They always failed because I knew it was selfish. I can't count how many times I've cried in showers, rain, and the night. I've always liked the rain, it distracts me.

Over thinking (Wilbur overthinks)

I've always would over think the worst possible outcomes. It got bad to the point where is asked people like my closest friends and/or my boyfriend if they'd leave in such a way I thought of. Sometimes I'd think about the possible ways theyd die. Honestly I was scared for Tubbos life at one point. He told me about voices just telling him to kill himself. He said how it never made sense because he never felt with thoughts like those before and he's never felt a sadness like depression, but he told me how the voices wanted him to kill themself. He said how he almost felt like giving in but didnt.

Distractions (Technos distractions)

My friends would always distract me from my problems. It wouldn't last long thought only 5 hours max. Then I'd go back to living the same shitty life. I'd always stare at my ceiling thinking about how my mental state is declining, or how everyone is going to leave me. I knew that my life was going down hill no matter what, and here I am. That's why I'd love and hate spending time with my friends. It would either be I'd ha f out with them or I'd make up a dumb excuse. I remember during a state of me making up excuses to ignore Wilbur would text me everyday saying he'd love me. I'd cry at those sometimes. I also liked the rain. It was another big distraction because I could just run in it. It took all my worry and problems away, it felt like I was a child again.

Haha. Anyways does anyone like my drawing? Act like the anatomy is normal okay. I promise I'm better at drawing.