Hold On Till May

chapter seventeen:

Kaitlyn: Three days past by fast and tomorrow was the day that we've all been waiting for. The day we all go to Paris and needless to say, i couldnt wait any longer.

The hate has gotten worse and the cuts were more frequent. To my surprise, Calum hasn't found out about it.

"Hey babe, the boys and i were thinking of going to the mall before we left. Wanna go and have nicole meet us there?" Calum asked and changed out of his pj clothes.

I nodded in agreement with Calum and ran to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Quickly, i dried myself off and slid on a pair of black shorts, a pierce the veil tank top and a red flannel and exited the bathroom to see an angry calum.

"Whats wrong?" I asked and put my clothes in the hamper.

"Nothing" he scoffed and tossed his phone down on the bed and started changing clothes.

"Calum, its obviously something" i protested and grabbed my vans from the closet.

"Promise you wont cry?" He looked at me with worried eyes. I just simply nodded and watched as Calum scrolled through his phone and showed me some of the comments on the picture of him and i on his twitter.

"Get away from calum!."

"Worthless bitch."

"Why is he even with her?."

"He looks way better with me."

"He could do way better."

I just chuckled a little and felt all the tears flood into my eyes.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked worridly.

"Because Calum its all true. I still dont understand why you even like me. I just dont get it. You could do better and you know it." I hung my head down and started crying as Calum brought me into his arms.

It hurt to know that people didnt want me to be happy with calum. I love him and i hope he loves me just as much.

"No kaitlyn its not. I dont like you. I fucking love you. I wouldnt trade you for an fan in the world and if anything you could have done better. While i have you as mine, i dont want to let you go because, i love you. Forever and Always."

I smiled to myself and instantly thought about my arm and felt guilty. "Calum theres something i want to show you and i know you wont be happy."

"What is it love?" Calum asked and pulled me into his chest.

I took a deep breath and rolled up the sleeve of my red flannel and instantly winced in pain as the fabric rubbed against the deep scars. Calum starred at the scars in silence for a while.

"Why?" Calums breathed out and i felt him shake and his grip on me became tighter.

"Im sorry Calum. The fans have gotten to me lately and with everything that has been going on with justin, is really just killing me. I love you with all my heart but, the fans hate seeing you and i together. They hate me. Im sorry calum" i felt tears start pouring down my cheeks.

"Kaitlyn, you cant let what they say get to you. If anything they're jealous of you. I love you more than you will ever comprehend and nothing the fans do or say will change how i feel about you. Remember im here for you. Please dont do this anymore, i hate seeing you this way" Calum kissed my cheek and held me in his arms for a good 5 minutes until we had to finish getting ready.

I did my make up, straightened my hair perfectly and i was finally done and ready to leave.

"Ready?" Calum asked and handed me my phone. I nodded and smiled a little bit and walked with him down the stairs. Calum and i waited outside on the front pourch waiting for Ashton to come and pick us up.

"Are you excited about going to Paris?" Calum smiled softly.

"Yeah but, i still say you didn't have to do that."

"And like i said i wanted to because, you, me and the guys need a little holiday" he engulfed me in a hug and wrapped his arms around my rather small waist.

Ashton pulled up in the range rover, as usual. "What is it with you and this car Irwin?" I laughed and climbed in the back seat with Calum.

"I love this car" he chuckled and started backing out if the drive way.

*at the mall*

"So babe where do you want to go first?" Calum asked and latched his hand to mine as we walked inside the mall.

"Hottopic" i smiled. I love that place to be honest, it is basically my natural habitat.(A/N: it really is XD.)

We walked into Hottopic and i immediately went towards the back to pick out some band tees. They had everything from Avenged Sevenfold to Bring Me The Horizon and i literally felt like i died and went to heaven.

I picked up a few band tees, 3 different colored skinny jeans, a few pairs of shorts, and a bring me the horizon beanie and made my way to the register.

"Find everythng okay?" She smiled and i nodded and pulled out my wallet.

"That will be $97.25" the cashier lady said and i handed her my hottopic card i got for christmas from my grandma. I finished paying and left.

"Holy shit what did you buy" Michael chuckled and examined the huge hottopic bag. "Well Mr. Clifford i bought a bunch of band merch."

Bands got me through Middle school and everything hard in my life. They were there when Calum couldn't be there because, of tour and thanks to both all my favorite bands and calum, im still alive.