Saving Death

Chapter 22

My hands slammed into the back door and I stumbled out onto the patio at the back of the house, gasping in the chilly air. Evening mist had settled, and as I searched the immediate area, my heart raced. I hoped Seline had been true to her word and stayed home. I needed to see her. Maybe she'd tell me this was all a cruel joke.

"Seline?" I shouted. My vision was blurred with tears as I scrambled up the grass verge onto the damp lawn. My shoes slipped and I was sure my jeans must be covered in green stains, but I didn't look back. I staggered upright and brushed past the ferns where I had hidden only a few nights ago. It all came flooding back to me, and I wondered if that Sam would have taken my life had Seline given him the chance.

Rounding the huge lolloping branches, I breathed a sigh of relief. A small wooden sun house came into view, dotted with fairy lights, and I could just see Seline inside, dozing in a chair. As I approached and stepped up onto the decking, I knocked gently on the window.

"Seline?" I said, watching as my breath cast white puffs into the air. Her eyes flickered open and when she saw my tear stained face, she hurried to the door, concern etched on her face.

"What is it?" she said, ushering me inside. "Did he hurt you? Are you okay?" She held my face in both her hands and searched my eyes, but all I could do was nod as tears continued to stream down my face.

"Ava? What happened?" I opened and closed my mouth as I tried to think of something coherent to say. "I knew this was a bad idea..." she began.

"I know—" I managed to stammer.

"It was a stupid idea! I'm so sorry, Ava, honey," she said, stopping and standing up straight. "What state is he in? Do I need to use magic?" She stared at me with a kind of feared anticipation.

I shook my head. "No, he's fine. I'm fine. I just—I found out," I sniffed. "I found out what he is, Seline. He showed me the rest of the markings on his back. I know he came for my mum." I broke down into full blown sobs, my vision blurring completely. Seline pulled me into a tight embrace, and I cried until her cardigan was damp with my tears and I had nothing left to give. I couldn't believe I'd been so stupid. It seemed so obvious now that I knew the truth, but it had suddenly made everything more complicated. I was beginning to realise why Sam had held off telling me. I was in deep now, and even if I'd wanted to leave, I wasn't sure that I could.

"He's wanted to tell you from day one," Seline said with sympathy, pulling me to sit down on the tiny cushioned bench beside her. I was exhausted and as I flopped down beside her, I wasn't sure I had the energy or the space left for empathy.

"He still took my mum," I uttered. I thought about all the times I'd let him comfort me, and I felt like I'd wronged my mum. He'd taken her life. What was I doing? He was the Grim Reaper.

"I know, Ava," said Seline, "but he's also risking his existence to be with you. He knows what he's done and he's known all along that when you found out who he was, you'd probably walk away."

"Then why bother?" I said, watching as Seline flinched at my words. "What's the point if he knew I'd walk away all along?"

"People can be very selfish with their own feelings," she said, a wistful smile spreading onto her face, "especially people like Sam."

"What do you mean?" I huffed.

"Imagine only ever feeling the things those feel in their last moments of life... Now imagine what love must feel like in comparison to those feelings." Seline's eyes were wide with wonder as she gazed at me, then she looked towards the door.

I followed her gaze to Sam, standing at the end of the dark lawn, watching us. Even as he stood further than fifteen feet away, I could feel his eyes boring into my own. Only moments before, I had stared into those same eyes, forcing my thoughts into his head. Little had I known that those same eyes had stared into my mum's as she had taken her last breaths. All I could think was that he knew how she felt when she died. Goosebumps trickled along my arms, and I forced myself to tear my eyes away from his.