Masked

alone

I had just arrive from the mall and was just washing plates when the door opened and in came Aunt Rose and John,

"Aunt Rose, Where have you been?" I ask her as she went inside and put her fur coat at the living room table.

"I am so sorry for leaving you like that My dear, I just wanted to help John search for a new apartment and we end up lost in the middle of nowhere, can you believe that we even had to sleepover at the car? " she explain to me

"Okay aunt Rose but please next time inform me I've been worried for you"

"Oh alright dear, John and I are going apartment hunting again and we will be back tomorrow, this time I will bring the GPS. Because the car's GPS keep on making us end up in the middle of nowhere. " she blabbed about.

I smile at my aunt, she might not be the best aunt in the world but I will never trade her for the world.

"Okay auntie but please do go home safely." I reminded her.

"Of course darling, if we're not back by midnight, you know what to do. "

I nod.

My aunt isn't the one who's all saggy and loose, she's only 21 years old And she's my mom's youngest sister, My mom conceived me real early like when she was only 19, my dad wasn't my real dad, my biological dad was my mom's unknown one night stand, but my step dad still treated me as his real daughter.

He loved me selflessly, he loved an imperfect mistake like me when everyone keep saying that No one would ever love me. He even loved me more than my mom.

I just wish that They were here.

I can't help shedding a tear as I think about them. Parts of my memory are still missing but I can remember both of them. My mother got hetero chroma iriduim causing her to have green left eyes while the other is a rich brown color. and she had strawberry blonde hair, while my dad had blue eyes and has an dark brown color of the hair,

Before I use to wonder why I look different than both of them, the only thing I have inherited is my Mom's heterochroma iridium but mine is blue and hazel green, my hair color is dark honey blonde.

I was snap out of my thoughts when someone snapped their hand in front of my face.

I shake my head and see Jerk's face just a hairstrand away from mine.

I backed away from him to keep some distance between him and me.

"You must be in deep thought, I have been trying to get your attention for about 5 minutes now" he explained to me

"That long?" I asked as my mouth gaped open

"Yeah" he shortly replied

"So why are you bothering me?" I asked him as I continue to wipe the dishes.

"I just wanted to tell you that your aunt and my bro have already left"

"Oh" i reacted because I didn't know how to react.

"That's it?" he asks with disbelief in his voice

"What's it?"

"Your just going to say 'Oh' after your aunt leaves you for 3 months?"

my jaw dropped "What?!"

"Yeah, she told me, She and my bro are going to the thailand to have some quality time with each other."

I was furious "Then why didn't you tell me? I didn't even said goodbye to Aunt Rose!" i whimpered

"I can't believe you, Your Aunt will leave you for a month all by yourself and the only thing your frustated about is not being able to say goodbye to your Aunt. Aren't you mad that she's going to leave you here?" he told me with disbelief

"No" I replied

"Aren't you bothered that you'll be all alone in that big mansion if I wasn't here?" he asks me

i shook my head, "I'm used to being alone, Aunt Rose often goes out of the country, usually she hires a maid to accompany me, but I think she didn't hire one today because your here, I -"

"This is wrong you know" he cut me off

"What's wrong?"

"You being used to being all alone" he mutters silently

"There's nothing wrong with it, Jerk. I don't need anyone, I can take care of myself." I answered him with a flat tone.

He didn't answer me but he looks at me with sadness in his eyes.

"Why?"

"Pathetic"

"What I can't understand you"

"No man is an island Xiara, Nobody can live by his own. Everyone need someone"

"Well I don't" I said through gritted teeth "I am fine. I have live up to this day without someone didn't I?" I told him.

"Depending on someone, isn't being weak Xiara, even strong people lose strength sometimes"

My shoulder tensed, My father told me the same exact thing.

I was speechless, I grew up with loneliness, so why did a few words from a guy I just met a few days ago, spark up a feeling I have never encountered before, the feeling of self pity.

I have never pitied myself. Nor praise myself. I've always regarded myself as unworthy of everything, I have never deemed myself as deserving of anything. But why do I feel that I deserve something more, from those words he just said. Why do I want to see the light when all my life I had live in darkness.

He made myself feel so vulnerable. He made me feel like I'm incomplete

He made me feel so alone

But at the same time

he made me think of myself as someone who deserve so much more than how I'm being treated right now.