Sweet Blissful Hell (Hawks x Reader x Dabi)

Chapter 20

Trigger warning: panic attack
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"So your the caladrius then" After hours of talking amongst yourselves Rumi summed it all up in one small sentence. You nodded to her. "Explains how you turned into a mouse" She laughed, you stood and went to the clearing in between the kitchen and couch.

"Okay, watch this though" You thought hard, closing your eyes, you shifted into a phoenix and flew above their heads, Rumi ducked pulling her ears down with her before uttering a 'wow'.

"We've not been working on it long but she's gotten back into the swing of it again" You fluttered above him before turning back and landing in his lap.

"I didn't realise how much I'd miss it to be honest." You admitted.

"So why not get back into hero work?" Rumi asked, Keigo glared at her and you lowered your head and rubbed your arm. "What?"

"Let's change the topic-"

"I have been thinking about it" You interrupted Keigo. He gasped and looked into your eyes as you as you smiled a little at him.

"You sure your ready for that?" He asked you with a concerned look on his face. You nodded at him, stood and stretched.

"Maybe, we'll see, I'll go try my costume on when I find it"

"It might be in one of the bags Celine brought with her" Keigo told you, you quickly ran of to his room to go through all  of your bits that had been brought over.

"If she's sure that she can handle it we can take her on a perimeter check of the area before she signs up to an agency or anything" Rumi suggested, Keigo sighed heavily and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples.

"Maybe, the commission and the L.O.V wants her, they saw her fly with me the other day" He leant forward putting his head in his hands, he didn't want you to rush into a decision and then regret it. Your old life as a hero had some traumatic effects on you but he was worried you were purposely not trying to think about it.

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You got to the bags with your bits in and started rummaging around, you found bits from your hidden box, there was photos, some merch and there it was, your old hero suit in a plastic bag, you took it out carefully and looked at it. Going to the large floor to ceiling mirror that was in the room, you held the fabric up to your body and took a long look at yourself.

You looked to your hand and noticed it trembling a bit. Closing your eyes you took a deep breath to calm yourself and looked at yourself with fake confidence, you started stripping your clothes off, placing them onto the bed before carefully sliding the material over your body. It was skin tight but still fit nicely, you turned a few times to check it was okay before noticing a few marks on the arms and a tiny amount of rubble on the floor.  

Your breath got a bit shaky as you started to remember the last time you wore this, the buildings falling, screams all around, you even noticed a little blood on the chest as you took closer inspection in the mirror. Your heart rate elevated as all you could hear was the screams and all you could see were the destroyed buildings, you dropped to your knees as unwanted tears started to fall.

"N-no, I-I thought I w-was over this" You whimpered, clapping your hands to your ears and closing your eyes tightly you screamed.

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Keigo and Rumi were trying to think of ways to slowly introduce you back into a heroes life until they heard an ear piercing scream, they both stood immediately. 

"Y/N!" Keigo ran as fast as he could, bursting through the bedroom door to see you crumpled on the floor, Rumi saw and was horrified.

"She's having a panic attack" They quickly rushed to your side, Keigo pulled your hands from your head and held them tightly as Rumi lifted your torso up gently to lean oh her, she pet your head lightly while holding you, rocking you gently. Keigo passed your hands over to Rumi who took them and placed them on her chest.

He quickly went and got your glass of water from the living room and brought it back, Mochi was trying to lick you but you couldn't snap out of it. Keigo sat beside Rumi who looked to him with worry in her eyes. 

"Y/N? Baby bird? It's okay, your here with Rumi and me, your safe I promise" He spoke gently to you and rubbed your back. When they knew you were responsive to them and what was going on around you they asked you to name 5 things to do with your senses and each sense counted down to 1. You answered through shaky breaths. As you eventually opened your eyes you saw Keigo looking at you with a gentle smile through Rumi's arms.

You held a hand out to him and he took it, coming closer to pull Rumi and you into a tight embrace.

"I'm not ready..." You whispered to them, they exchanged looks before pulling you closer.

"It's okay to not be ready Y/N" Rumi started.

"We'll be here for you every step of the way, we promise" Keigo finished as Rumi nodded. You wiped your tears away before staring at the sleeve of your hero uniform, seeing tiny bits of rubble stuck on it.

"Lets get this off you and into something comfy okay?" He said. They both slowly stood and helped you up. 

"Do you want a bath?" Keigo asked, you saw the blood again as you looked down and quickly nodded, he went to the bathroom and started on that for you as Rumi saw you clawing at your arms to get the material off.

"It's okay, let me help" She spoke gently, hearing you chanting 'get this off me'. Sliding the material off your body you held it and threw it aside. You didn't care that you were in your underwear in front of a hero you hardly knew, she held you tight and wrapped a soft blanket around your shoulders.