When the Leaves Fall [bxp] ✔

10

Free

Felix didn't quite know what to expect when Jupiter said that they should go hang out. Even the music coming through the speakers of the car wasn't enough to calm his nerves, and he wasn't quite sure what to do. He'd been about to get in his own car when Jupiter had suggested that they go in their car, since they wanted their location to be a surprise. Felix knew that Tarla wouldn't mind him leaving his car parked next to her house until he came back from wherever Jupiter was taking him.

Jupiter's music taste wasn't what Felix had expected. Strawberries and Cigarettes by Troye Sivan had been playing through the speakers, immediately followed by a Sabrina Carpenter song he hadn't heard before, but sounded similar to her music when she first started out. Felix forced himself to keep breathing, drumming his hand lightly against his thigh. He tried listening to the lyrics, 'I keep my eyes wide open..." His focus kept drifting toward Jupiter, and how they were just barely nodding their head along to the song. Jupiter glanced at him, a grin spread across their face.

"Are you gonna tell me where we're going yet?" Felix asked, smiling, ignoring how his heart jumped when he started talking.

"You'll see!" they insisted, keeping their eyes fixed on the road but also glancing at Felix. Felix just let out a breathy laugh, trying to relax in his seat. He closed his eyes, feeling the slight blow of the ac, letting the music fill his ears and he relaxed his muscles. The lyrics were smooth, and light. And one song went to the next, Felix keeping his eyes shut, and just breathing. It was Jupiter, he had nothing to be nervous about.

"Ok keep your eyes closed." Felix heard Jupiter say, the hum of the music faded along with the engine turning off. Felix felt himself start to grin, he was excited, and did he fall asleep? Didn't matter, he was awake then. He heard Jupiter get out of the car, and unbuckled his own seatbelt. He heard the sound of the door opening beside him, and he felt a hand gently touch his. He grinned, taking Jupiter's hand and trying not to stumble as he got out of the car.

"Can I open my eyes," he asked, biting his lip nervously.

"Not yet," they hummed, gently letting their hand slip out of his. All Felix heard was the sound of the wind and Jupiter's footsteps. He took a deep breath, letting the wind push his hair backwards. The breeze was gentle, and October was creeping up. And soon the leaves would turn from green to oranges and reds. The wind would pick up, and everyone would be wearing sweaters. His flannel wouldn't seem so out of place, and he would be able to hear the crunch of leaves against his feet. But not quite yet. October and November were just on the horizon, but at that moment, the sun still beat down stronger than the wind blew.

"Okay, okay almost, let me just-" Jupiter murmured, moving around quickly. "Okay," they said slowly. "Now open your eyes." He could hear Jupiter holding their breath. He opened his eyes and simply gasped. They'd brought Felix to a field. And in front of him was a picnic mat, and two blankets on top of it. There was a small black speaker, and Jupiter was grinning, their shoulder's relaxing a little seeing Felix's face.

"This place looks awesome!" Felix laughed, breathless for some reason. He felt his neck warm seeing Jupiter's tilt their head as they glanced at the blankets. "When did you have time-" Felix cut himself off, spinning around to look at everything. And it was just Jupiter and him as well.

"Umm, I normally come here on my own, I found this place when I was going for drives, the first weekend I was here. And it was just beautiful, and I come here whenever I wanna be away from everything for a minute. And umm, I guess I just wanted to share it with someone," they mumbled, rubbing the back of their neck.

"This place just feels amazing," Felix grinned. "And I'm so glad that I'm the person you shared it with." He said the last part quietly, glancing between the ground and their face. They just mumbled a yeah, before sitting down. Felix held back his grin and sat across from them.

"Do you wanna play something?" they asked, gesturing towards the speaker. Felix nodded, connecting his phone to the speaker, and queuing one of his favorite playlists. The sound of LANY's you! came through the speakers, and Felix felt himself blush. Ignoring the warming of his cheeks, he glanced at Jupiter to see their reaction. Their head was tilted, closing their eyes to listen to it.

"I've never heard this," they said softly, opening their eyes, to look Felix in his.

"It's you! by LANY, they're one of Aeron's favorite bands," Felix rambled, and Jupiter just nodded, listening along.

The two of them spent the next few hours losing themselves in music and conversation until Felix's playlist came to an end, and the two of them glanced at the time. But the hours they'd spent there made Felix feel free. Freer than he'd felt in a long time. He didn't realize how busy he constantly was, that spending a few hours with Jupiter made him feel like he was flying. Just like that time in the coffee shop, and every conversation they'd had together. It was like being around Jupiter reminded him that life wasn't always as fast as it felt like it was. The drive back was quiet except the quiet hum of music. Felix swore that Jupiter's cheeks were red, and he was pretty sure- or hoped- that it wasn't only because of the wind and ac.

"Would you maybe wanna grab coffee with me sometime?" Felix blurted when Jupiter stopped in front of Tarla's house. He saw Jupiter's eyes widen in panic. "You don't have to say yes, it's totally cool if you don't wanna!" He felt his heart drop as they opened their mouth to say something. He shouldn't have said anything, he shouldn't have risked it.

"I would love to, it's just that-" they stopped, taking a deep breath. "Umm, I don't think I'm ready for a relationship right now?"

"That's fine," Felix said quickly, feeling his heart race, and his breathing even out. "We don't have to start dating or anything at all." Jupiter's shoulders relaxed a little.

"I like you too," they said softly. "I'm just not really ready for a relationship yet."

"I get that," Felix nodded. "I totally do, and that's fine." Jupiter smiled tentatively. Felix felt his phone buzz in his hands, a text on his family group chat. "Umm I should go, that was my moms."

"Umm yeah, totally," Jupiter nodded, nodding their head. Felix ran his hands through his hair, quickly. He unbuckled his seatbelt, opening the door.

"I'll umm, text you?"

"Yeah, and we'll see each other at school as well!"

"Yeah!" Felix got out of the car, ignoring his racing heart, a smile spread across his entire face. He opened the door to his own car, and watched as Jupiter drove towards their own house. When Jupiter was clearly out of sight, he danced crazily to himself in the car, before plugging in the playlist that he'd just played with Jupiter, driving towards his house, singing along to the songs, and grinning widely.

----

Felix felt inspired, something that he'd been missing. He opened the black book that lay abandoned that entire day. He ignored the lyrics, instead playing the chords and the melody, his fingers dancing along the piano. It wasn't perfect. He tried changing the key, playing it a little higher, but that wasn't right either. He started messing around with accidentals, making the song start to feel less slow and sad, and more... free. The same free feeling that he felt when he was in that field. The same free feeling he thought of when he thought of Jupiter's laugh. The same free feeling of wind blowing leaves through the air and the colors of the world changing

Felix hummed along to the melody, singing only that first verse he'd had written for so long. Yet the fact that the song wasn't even close to being finished didn't bother him. Because Felix was pretty sure that once this song was finished, he wasn't gonna keep it only to himself. He'd share it. He wasn't quite sure who the first person to listen to his original music would be. He wasn't sure if he'd share that particular song either. He just knew that it was almost time, for people  to know that Felix Barot-Cooper wrote songs.