𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐘 - (Anakin x Reader)

𝟔𝟒 - 𝐀 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐛𝐲𝐞𝐬

(a/n - Warning, this is a very emotion and angst filled chapter, it's a rollercoaster. I know we've already been through a lot together in previous chapters but I know how much books can mean to some people so I just wanted to prepare anyone who might not be in the right state of mind to read this right now! also, this isn't the final chapter so maybe that can fill you with some hope. Love you and if ever you want to chat with me about anything that's troubling you, my messages are always open!)

Tears.

There were a lot of them.

The pain was like nothing I had ever experienced, it stabbed through all my nerves and ripped at every single single fibre of my being, everything hurt. Until his hand slipped into mine.

The searing white lights, sparkling needles and blaring beeps from the machines were anything but comforting, my only source of tranquillity came from Anakin who leant over beside me.

His fingers combed through my hair that was splayed underneath me on the medical bed, his other hand interlocked with mine, brushing sweet circles into my skin.

He whispered encouraging praises into my ear but I only had the strength to weakly smile back, beaming my tear stained cheeks as much as possible.

"You're doing so good, but you need to push baby" he whispered.

Nurse Imogen was at the other end of the bed, along with some midwife droids scattered round the rest of the room. They muttered flustered instructions at each other but the only voices I could hear were the demons swirling through my mind.

I stared into Anakin's eyes, just looking at him eased the monsters in my head. He was smiling small, trying his best to stay calm. But I saw it. The fire of dread in his irises. Burning away at him from the inside, blazing a panic. Spurring his nightmare into reality.

"I- I cant" I whimpered.

I wanted to prove him wrong. I really wanted to.

But I was tired.

Weak.

The pain I was experiencing wasn't actually from the childbirth, no. It was something deeper, something more sinister. And much like the fire behind Anakin's eyes, it was burning away at me from the inside, soaking into my heart.

I was slipping, that much was clear. And the worst part was that unlike previous times, I wasn't ready to die. I didn't want to leave.

"I'm going to die aren't I?" I whispered under shaky breaths. "Anakin I don't want to die!" tears continued to trace down my cheeks as pure fear set in.

His eyebrows pulled together, furious at how helpless he was in this situation, but still the mask of emotion he wore stayed intact "you're not going anywhere okay?" his fingers clutched at mine more desperately, bringing my hand to his chest "you're not going anywhere" he repeated, more so to convince himself.

But everything was slowing down.

Time itself seemed to slow down as my eyelids became heavy under the weight of exhaustion.

Through the mist of sound that was already starting to fade away, an alarm rang out from one of the machines plugged beside me. Imogen ran over to it, panic striking across her face.

"Her heart rate is slowing down" she gasped.

And she wasn't wrong, I could feel my heartbeat clamouring through my chest, each chime like a ticking time-bomb, growing deeper as its rhythm slowed.

"We need to do something! I don't understand how- why is this happening!?" Anakin stressed, fear evident in his voice now.

"Everything was perfectly fine, she is completely healthy!" even the nurse was losing her cool "it's like someone is...draining her life away. Like someone is literally stealing her life-force from her..."