Girl in a Hoodie: Where the Future Lies

Chapter 26

Riley's POV:

I turn around from looking at the large mirror in front of me to face James who was lounging around on the bed reading some sort of magazine which I soon realize had a bunch of hot girls on it. I roll my eyes and throw it out of his hands, causing him to look up at me. "Riles, what was that for?" he moans.

"You have me to look at. You don't need to keep looking through pictures of those girls," I scold him. He smirks and sits up on the bed. "Anyway, which dress do you think I should wear for dinner?" I ask. "This one...?" I raise my hand which was holding a grey dress with a black belt sewn onto it with sequins on and was short-sleeved with a round neck. He purses his lips, studying it. "Or this one...?" I question. I lower my hand before lifting up the other one, holding a blue and white striped dress which was quite loose and summery, off-the-shoulder and was just about knee-length.

"You'll look beautiful in anything, Ri," he tells me. I frown at that, wanting to be told a proper answer. It's my first dinner with my mother and I need to look perfect for it, therefore, I need to be told the truth not the regular cliché things I'm told by him, although I can't lie that he does know how to make me blush sometimes. He gets up and grins, noticing the look on my face as he stands in front of me. "But I prefer the first one, you'll look cuter," he says, kissing my lips.

I smile when he pulls back and then turn around and look at myself, holding the chosen dress in front of me and looking at my reflection, biting my bottom lip. Half of my clothes are now maternity wear and I know it's mandatory (or else if not, I'd be better off walking around naked which I know loads of people, including myself and James, would disapprove of) but I still don't feel too great about it all.

I keep looking at myself as James stands behind me and wraps his arms around the front of my neck, kissing my cheek. "Stop," he says. I raise an eyebrow, looking at him through the mirror. "You keep on doing this, Riles. Judging your looks. Stop it." I roll my eyes, leaning backwards in his arms and resting my head against his neck. "You're perfect just the way you are so stop thinking otherwise," he tells me. He places a lingering kiss on the top of my head before I turn around and wrap my arms tightly around his body, looking up at him.

"I'm sorry," I say quietly. He smiles, kissing the tip of my nose. "I know it's annoying, but I'm sorry," I repeat.

"It's okay, babe."

James and I sat beside each other at the dinner table whilst my mum sat opposite us beside Marcus, and Em sat at one end of the table, the other end empty. I used the 'finest cutlery', as Mum had described it, to cut into the pork and chewed on it. It was rather awkward since no one was saying much and we were mostly all just looking down at our food whilst we ate but I was continuously exchanging looks with Em and James.

It stays that way for a couple of minutes until Marcus speaks up.

"So... you two are engaged, huh?" he says. I look to my left at James as he shrugs.

"Uh... yeah..." I say so quietly it was like a whisper. "The wedding's near the end of March," I add. He nods.

"So, James, were you always thinking of proposing or did you only do it after screwing her?"

"Marcus," Mum hisses at him.

"I mean, all due respect and all, but really? You guys are what, sixteen?" he questions. I look at Emily but she just stays sat there, eating a potato. I put my cutlery beside each other on the plate as I had finished eating, leaving behind the smallest amount of pork. I say 'finished eating' but I really mean to say lost my appetite.

"We're eighteen actually. And why does it matter if I was thinking of proposing to her or not originally? I would have wanted to spend the rest of my life with her either way," James says, taking my hand and holding it on top of the table. I smile up at him before facing the opposite way once again.

"Just a bit odd, that's all," Marcus mumbles, shuffling about in his seat. Mum looks at me and breathes in a little.

"Riley, honey, are you not going to finish your pork, dear?" she asks me. 

"Oh, um, no, I'm full sorry-"

"Sure you're not a vegetarian? Save the animals and all," Marcus mutters, interrupting me. I raise an eyebrow, as does James, but we don't comment on it and ignore his strange behaviour. "Or is it your pregnancy?" he smirks. "Can't get everything down yet, huh? Kids raising kids. You two don't even know what life is and you're ready to be parents? As if."

"I don't get what you mean. It's my life and my body so-" I begin to say but the comments Marcus had made obviously spoke to James more than me as I knew how to keep my calm, my fiancé, on the other hand, was far from composed and it shows when he interrupts me.

"It's our decision and our choice. You've got nothing to do with it at all and it's not like either of you have been there for her at all in the past eighteen years of her life. We are ready for this, no doubt about it and if we weren't, I'm pretty sure we would have found another way to deal with it sooner-"

"It's okay, Jay," I whisper to him, my eyes focused on my food despite me not even wanting to eat any longer. He looks down at me but shakes his head lightly, clearly in disagreement, then continues his long rant out at my mum and her partner. The whole time, Marcus seemed to find it rather amusing as he didn't stop smirking which I could tell only made James crack even more but as much as he was trying to stick up for the both of us, a part of me wishes for him to not have said anything. I don't know if it's because I actually want to be on good terms with my family or because I find it embarrassing how he's blurting out everything I've ever only told him or kept to myself, either way, it just feels wrong.

"And the amount of times she's harmed herself in her bedroom or been hurt by the only family member she has left is horrible. But of course you wouldn't know any of this because you've not been there for her through anything-"

"Babe, stop it," I tell him once again in a stern plea as I ache through the dedication of his words and how he's trying his hardest to fight my side, except it's just making everything worse. I thought I left all of these negative thoughts behind ages ago but now everything's coming back and it's going to be so hard to get rid of them again.

"Got a little temper have we?" Marcus mumbles, his elbow rested over the top of the table surface as he took a bite of his pork with a sheer grin plastered on his face.

"Marcus," Mum says to him. He turns to face her and she shakes her head, tutting her teeth, not that it changes anything as he soon ends up bringing Emily into the conversation.

"I get that you two have hardly known each other for long at all, but honestly, I felt for sure you would have turned out more like your sister, Riley. Bold, sensible, hardworking. Not a slut-"

"She's not a slut!" James defends me, placing a hand on my knee. I look to Em, watching her lips depart from the other but she seemed to be at a loss of words as all she does is mouth an apology to me in two inaudible words.

"Well she must be if she seriously got herself knocked up by you. You're not a real one. You're a player. It's easy to tell that by the way you act. So defensive and anger leaking out of your veins. I wouldn't be surprised if you were to leave her in a couple of months' time." 

James doesn't respond to that. It's as if he didn't know how to and all of the anger that had just been striving through him had deflated. I know how sensitive the subject of his ruthless break-outs are to him. He hates when people look at him in that way and he despises the characteristic of being a player being linked to his personality. I know he's changed and he's not like that anymore but it's so hard for everyone else to see that, including people like Michelle. She thought it would be better if I didn't even go through with the pregnancy and instead got it rid of and it was because of James's reputation, having kissed so many girls or dated them in the past. 

I lightly remove James's hand from off of my knee as I slide my chair back and then stand up.

" 'scuse me," I murmur. Em calls after me, asking whether or not I was going to finish eating but I don't bother replying. I just follow the set of instructions I had been given earlier, on how to get to mine and James's room and then I close the door behind me, wanting nothing more than to be alone.