Girl in a Hoodie: Where the Future Lies

Chapter 27

James's POV:

"Riles?" I call through the bedroom door as I knock on it subtly. There was a soft movement coming from the other side in the few moments I waited for her response but no words were spoken. "Ri, please can I come in?" I ask her slowly and gently. 

"Okay," she says so quietly that I wasn't even sure if it was her that had spoken, but when I open the door, I see her sat on the edge of the bed with her hands by her sides and biting her lip as usual. I sigh, closing the door behind me before walking over to her and sitting down, our thighs grazing against each other as a dreaded silence stained the air. She was playing with her fingers, the rings more specifically, as she looked down at the silver up until I placed my hand over the top of hers. She didn't turn to look at me but just stared at it as my palm touched the back of hers.

"I'm sorry," I tell her quietly. 

"About what? I mean, it's not like you didn't just choose to not ignore it and go into your angry temper mode, making my first first dinner with my actual mother an awful one," she mumbles. 

"I deserved that." She doesn't reply and it falls silent once again. I hate it when it's like this. We're supposed to be able to talk to each other about everything and yet we're avoiding doing so. "I really didn't mean to say all of that, Ri," I say after a while. 

"I know," she says.

"You know?"

"Yes, James. I know you pretty well by now to know that you didn't mean it," she exhales. "And believe it or not, despite you being an incredible pain sometimes," she smirks, "it's not you that I'm upset with." I shuffle closer towards her and then she rests her head on my shoulder. "I just wish people knew about what it's like... you know, having to have gone through so much and still not be good enough for anyone. No matter what I do, it's just never enough and I'm sick of it," she murmurs.

"It's not about everyone else though, Ri. It's about you... and me... no one else."

"I wish you could understand me, Jay," she whispers tiredly, beginning to play with my fingers and temporarily distracting me as she did. "I just wish you knew."

Riley's POV:

The next morning I wake up and find myself clutching James's pillow in my arms. I found that he wasn't sleeping beside me but was instead sat on the foot of the bed and was saying a bunch of things I couldn't quite comprehend. I close my eyes again, my eyes straining from the light that was shining brightly and slowly making it feel as if my eyesight was dying. But I smile when he shuffles closer towards me and bends down to kiss me softly.

I moan, turning myself over to lie flat on my back before shuffling up so that I was leaning against the headrest and then I see a cute chihuahua puppy on the ground below me, waggling its tail. I look up at James and he smiles back at me. I'm thinking he's already had a shower since he's wearing jeans and a black t-shirt with a black zipper hoodie over the top which leaves me wondering what the time was. I grab my phone from off of the bedside table and turn it on to see that it had now gone 11:52.

"You overslept again," James tells me, chuckling. I roll my eyes as I place my phone back where I had got it from. "Your mum said she's gone out with Emily, clothes shopping, I think."

"Mm. And Marcus?"

"He's downstairs, working from home today," he apprises. I nod and then James leans down to pick up the cute puppy before passing him to me to hold in my arms. I smile, stroking my hand over his ears. "His name's Milo," he tells me.

"He's cute."

"Not as cute as you though." I look up at him and raise an eyebrow, not because it's weird for him to call me cute but because I was literally lying in bed with my hair looking an absolute mess, wearing a set of pyjamas which just about fit me and I had a freaking bump on my stomach which was growing especially fast the past few days. "You are, Riles," he persists.

"Whatever," I grin, sitting up properly but keeping an eye on James as he seemed to have suddenly changed moods and was staring at nothing in particular. It's like he had zoned out, although I'm not quite sure why he would. "Hey? You okay?" I ask him, using my fingers to tousle his hair where his curls had deflated.

"It's just... what you said last night," he says. I think back to what I had said before remembering. 

"I didn't mean it like-" I begin to justify but he cuts me off, taking my hand which had previously been placed around the back of his head to hold in his own.

"No. You're right. I don't understand. And I don't know what you're feeling. You're always so secretive with me, Riles, and it's like you don't trust me well enough to tell me everything but I want you to be able to trust me," he says. "We need to trust each other for this to work."

"Y-You're not breaking up with me, are you?" I ask unsurely, a lump in my throat.

"No, baby. Of course I'm not," he answers with a sweet smile. "I just want to be able to understand you more and for that to happen, we need to be more open to each other, okay?" I nod.

"Sorry. I just really don't like Marcus at the moment," I mumble, mainly to myself but he chuckles anyway.

"I know. Do you want to go out into the city later? Just me and you? I could see if I can find some places for us to go?" I smile, nodding as I lean forward to kiss him.

"I'd like that." I pull away from his lips as he tucks some hair behind my ear. "I love you, James. So much. And I really don't know what I'd do without you," I tell him lovingly. His hand stops running through my locks as he removes it and places it softly on my arm.

"I love you too. Now hurry up and shower and get dressed, then I'll be downstairs and make some breakfast," he tells me. I nod and then slide my legs out of the duvet to the edge so that they were dangling and then I slipped my feet into my white, fluffy sliders before getting up, heading to the en suite in my shorts and tank top before hearing James call after me. "You know you look incredibly hot in those shorts."

I roll my eyes to myself, taking out my toothbrush and toothpaste from my toiletry bag I had set on the vanity.

"I'd rather hot than not," I say back to him. I wet my toothbrush under the tap before squeezing the paste onto it in one line but the noise of a door opening, brings me to cease. I turn around and then see my fiancé standing there with a playful smirk on his lips.

"You need any help?" he begins to ask but I turn away to look back at myself, knowing what he was really asking.

"Don't even think about it." He laughs at me as he walks in anyway but had left the door open so I know he wasn't actually going to force me into doing something I don't want to and as he wraps his arms around my waist from behind (well, as best as he could), he nuzzled his head into the crook of my neck, covering my neck in soft kisses.

"Are you sure you don't want this?" he asks me. 

"No, babe. Sorry to break it to you, but I'm already pregnant. And I'm hungry for proper food right now," I emphasize. He grins before stepping away.

"Okay. I'll be downstairs though, yeah?" I nod, giving him one quick kiss before he leaves, shutting the door and then I look at my reflection once again, sighing.

"Ready to start the day, yay...!" I mumble to myself sarcastically.

A/N: Not proof-read. And I've been feeling kind of unmotivated today but just felt the need to get this chapter out. Sorry if it's really bad.