I know there's not much comfort I can bring you. I have no idea just how bad it is over there and I never will understand everything you've been through. I won't try to even compare it to anything. I will say that I'll be here for you whenever you need an escape. I'll try to bring you as much comfort as I can. I'm sorry my letters aren't bringing you much comfort anymore. If there's anything I can do, please let me know. I'll do whatever I can to make sure you have something that brings you comfort. I'll do everything in my power to get you what you want. Know that you're strong enough to get through this war, even if it's by the skin of your teeth, you're still strong. You continued on your mission after watching your best friend die. You barely had time to even process that before you were continuing. Then they sent you back out to do it all over again. I think you deserve a rest.
The papers say we're close to winning the war, but it seems that it will never end. I've begun to think that they're just saying it close to the end to keep our spirits up, but they don't know that we've already lost all hope of our loved ones coming home. My father wrote to me the other day telling me my mother has decided to stay in bed until Joseph and I come home safely. I wrote back that she will be writing a lifetime for Joseph to come back home and settle. Us Blakes are too adventurous to stay in one spot our entire lives. My father knows that and I think my mother knows that as well, she just wants Joseph home safe. She knows that I'm much safer in London than Joseph is in France. I've told her time and time again that I have no want nor need to get to France and become a nurse in a warzone. I'm fine in a hospital.
Joseph may have mentioned that he was now in your regiment, but I told him that you like your space. I apologize for him not leaving you alone. It seems that he does the exact opposite of what I tell him to do, I never thought he'd do the opposite with you involved, but I was mistaken. Tell him to fuck off, he'll get the message and leave you alone. Well, he'll give you more space. I don't think Joseph will leave you alone ever. It's the Blakes thing, we stick to the people we consider friends, even when they don't want our support. Joseph probably is just making sure you don't do something reckless or he's believing he can replace Tommy. Not replace, but maybe become your new Blake friend. I promise, Joseph is a lot less reckless than Tommy, but he's also able to read a person better than Tommy. He'll read exactly what you're feeling by just watching you for a minute. So, maybe try for him not to do that.
As for you leaving, I'm glad that you are going to get a change of scenery, as much as you can in a warzone. Though, I do not like the idea of you moving closer to the front line. I like the fact that you are far from harm when I read your letters or write to you. At least then, I know you won't be killed from the time I receive your letter to the time I send one back to you. I know you're as safe as you can be in France. I do not like the talk about the march to your new settlement as a death march. Promise me you'll be safe. Just as you told me to take care of myself, I will tell you the same. Take care of yourself, William Schofield. I don't want to hear from Joseph that you've gone and got yourself hurt because you were too tired to be a functioning soldier. Take care of yourself for me until I can take care of you.
Sophia and I are almost completely settled. Sometimes I miss my orchard, usually, when the hospital is so hectic I barely can get time for myself, but other than that, I truly do love London. The city is gorgeous, even with what is happening around us. I can't help but feel that I was meant for this city. It's always so full of life and yes, I still get lost, but even then I find something new. Sophia also loves it. She's been staying with me ever since she got lost that one night, but we've been enjoying each other's company. I think we both feel safer with each other near.
The hospital is busy most days. I barely get a rest while I'm working, but honestly, I'll take it over having nothing to do. It distracts me from the horrors that I've been seeing every day. It's the worst at night, when we're all in bed and silently trying to sleep. I close my eyes and I see the soldiers that we have no ability to help. It's awful, Will. I find myself crying myself to sleep most nights and I can't help but think of you and how much suffering you must see constantly. I cannot imagine that pain.
