Mission failed (Choi Seung-hyun fanfic)

~ We fight, we make up ~

A/N:

You know when a writer should warn his readers about the next chapter but they don't know how nor what to say? Well this is that chapter. Enjoy. :)

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"It... it says here this man died all most a year ago!" I exclaimed. Suddenly I felt like a complete idiot. It hasn't even been six months since I met Seung-hyun, so this couldn't have been me. I closed the folder looking shamefully at my feet. My whole body was shaking. "I'm..." I started to apologise but he grabbed the folder from my hands and walked away. I gasped and followed after him. "Seung-hyun, please, I'm really sorry! It's just, when I saw his picture was crossed I assumed..." "Exactly." He cut me off looking straight into my eyes. "You assumed, and based on that you created a whole idea in your head that wasn't even true and just went crazy!" he was still shouting. He was so terrifying when he was angry that I was afraid to even look at him, so I just kept looking at my feet. "If... if you had just told me about that man when I asked you..." I didn't know how to continue. I was trying to slip my way out of this mess because I was feeling so ashamed of myself, I even shouted at him because of my ignorance. Suddenly he grabbed my shoulders and squeezed a bit too tight. "Tell you what?" he started shaking me and I finally looked him in the eyes, terrified. "That he was a man? That he had a name? A family maybe?" he shouted. The thought of that pained me and I looked down again. "Look at me!" he screamed. I lifted my gaze immediately, looking back into his fierce eyes that were full of anger and pain. "He was a hit man, a murderer, a killer, call it as you like! He would've killed me without a blink. And I let you think he would've killed you too because I didn't want you to know the truth. But you know what he would've done to you? He would've tortured you, for days, maybe even weeks until you'd tell him all you know about your father. And by then you would probably beg him to kill you!" he stopped shaking me and I completely froze. I didn't know what to say, my mind was a complete mess and I felt as though the air was sucked right out of the room. He released his grip on my shoulders and turned around. I was afraid to even touch him right now. His whole body was shaking and he was barely keeping it together, I was afraid that anything I do or say now could make him even angrier. "The sole thought of what might've happened there... Geez Annabelle!" he put his head in his hands and crouched. I walked around him and kneeled in front of him, hesitant on what to say. I stayed in front of him for a couple of minutes, I already apologised and I knew that doing it again would hold no meaning to him. No, he knew I was like this because I was hiding my dreams and the thought of me not confiding in him was torturing him. "I don't dream of him anymore." I finally said. He removed his hands from his face and looked at me with weary eyes. He didn't say anything which was my cue to continue. "I mean... I still have night mares, but they're different. And I don't think it's just about him anymore." I said. He sat down on the floor and pulled me in his lap. I cuddled up in his embrace and put my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. "Tell me everything." He said softly. So I told him about the latest dreams I had, the ones where he turned out to be the man behind the black helmet strangling me, and the ones where I shot him. As I was finishing I was reluctant on whether or not to tell him the last dream I had, this one also different from the others. "And then..." I started but then I stopped. I didn't want to tell him about that dream, but he noticed I was still hiding something. "Annabelle, just tell me." He said weakly. He seemed really tired, but at least he calmed down. I hated that I made him worry so much about me. Sometimes I wanted to tell him so badly to leave me and go live a better life without me but I guess I was too big a coward and too selfish to let go of him. "Well, two days ago I had a different dream, we were at my house and it was that morning when you brought me breakfast. And then you kiss me and suddenly you begin choking. And I watch you choke and I can't do anything and suddenly all around me are corpses of my friends and family and I know it's all because of me but I just keep standing there in the pool of blood thinking how I need to buy new shoes, because the ones I have are drenched in blood! It's terrible!" I didn't realize that my voice became high pitched until I stopped talking and took a deep breath. I was shaking remembering that awful dream. That night I woke up screaming again and Seung-hyun came to my room and I lied again telling him that I had the same dream as usual but I was glad that I told him the truth now. He began stroking my hair. "Did you dream it just that once or was it the same last night too?" he asked. I remained quiet. I didn't sleep again after I had that dream but he'd get really angry if I told him that. He pulled my chin to see my expression and I looked away shamefully. "Don't tell me you didn't sleep for the past two days." He said angrily. I opened my mouth to protest but then I just shut them. I didn't want to lie to him again now that I finally told him the whole truth. He sighed, caressing my face with his fingers. "How did I not notice that before?" he said passing his finger over the bags under my eyes. Then he got up and pulled me with him. "You're going to sleep little girl." He dragged me into my bedroom and tucked me under the blankets. He laid over them next to me and hugged me. "Good night love." He whispered in my ear. I smiled, compared to 'little girl' I really liked when he called me love. "Buona notte amore!" I said repeating in Italian his exact words. He smirked and kissed my forehead. As I cuddled up beside him I realized I was unexpectedly tired and weary. I closed my eyes in hope that with him by my side the nightmares will stay away. Just a few hours later I woke up in sweat from a nightmare again, I looked on my right and Seung-hyun was still lying next to me, asleep. I got out of his embrace and got up, leaving him to sleep soundlessly. I went to the kitchen to drink a glass of water, I was really stressed out and the glass in my hand was shaking. How much longer will I be able to go on like this? It's driving me insane. I took a deep breath concentrating on the water in my glass. Suddenly from the middle of it began to spread red, until the glass was full of red liquid. I screamed and let the glass fall on the floor, it shattered in little pieces spilling the content. I looked down at it and it was water again. Seung-hyun came running from my room. "What's wrong?" he asked. I looked at the water on the floor with wide eyes and I began to shiver. He ran towards me and pulled me into a hug. "Hey, it's ok. I'm here now." He tried to calm me as I sobbed in his shirt. "It was full of blood, the glass was full of blood!" I cried. He looked down at the shattered glass on the wet floor. "It's just water love, just water." he said. I put my hands around his waist and squeezed him to myself. "Help me." I cried out. I felt his body getting stiff, he was doing the best he could and yet I was not getting any better. This was hurting him way more than me, and I knew my tears and sobs didn't help at all. "I love you." I told him, trying to make him feel better. He hugged me tighter. "I love you too." He said and kissed the tip of my head. I lifted my face to look at him. "Why?" I asked him. I felt so ashamed, I was always crying, all most every night now. I'd make him worry about me for nothing and I even made a mess out of things tonight up to the point he lost control. "What do you mean?" he furrowed his eyebrows. "Let's face it, I'm a complete mess, and I'm not getting any better. I'm grateful that you're always here for me, comforting me and saying you love me. But aren't you getting tired? You'd be so much better without me." I sighed finally saying out loud what I wanted to for so long. He deserved much better and it was time I stopped being so selfish. In the end, it wasn't even his fault that I was like this, he didn't owe me nothing. "What are you saying? You think I don't want to be by your side? Why on earth do you think that?" he asked. I sighed again and looked down. "I just don't want you to feel like you're obligated to take care of me like this. I will understand if you want to leave, after all living with me must be horrible. I'm like this roller-coaster of bad emotions right now and I can't help but feel like I'm forcing you to ride it with me." I sniffed a few times but I finally stopped crying. "Annabelle please look at me." he said. I didn't want to, my eyes were probably read and sore and I must've looked terrible after crying. I didn't want him to look at my face, but he took my chin and pulled it up. "You're insane if you think I'm not going to ride that roller-coaster with you as many times as I have to until you realize that I'm always going to be here for you to rely on and to look for shelter. I'm going to love you so much that every time you see me your smile will grow bigger and with time I'm even going to make you forget about all the bad things that happened." After he said that he kissed my lips. It was short but the taste of his sweet lips on mine spread a warm feeling in my chest. I felt better instantly. I leaned my head on his shoulder and sighed. He always knew what to say to me. "If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?" I mumbled into his shoulder. "What?" he asked. "No, it's just something I read some time ago and thought how it related to our situation." I said. He smiled warmly. "Yeah, it does." He pulled my chin again and planted another kiss on my lips. I kissed him back slipping my tongue into his mouth. He lifted me on the kitchen counter without braking the kiss. His lips were warm and soft and I couldn't contain myself from biting and pulling his lower lip. He circled his tongue around mine sending me strong sings of dominance. I started to unbutton his shirt but he took my hands and put them down. He broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against mine. His eyes were closed and he was taking deep breaths while I looked at his beautiful face with enchantment. "What are you doing to me little girl?" he whispered. I leaned towards his neck and started sucking on his clavicle. He moaned. This small sound sent shivers through my whole body. "I want you." I whispered slowly to him as I continued trailing kisses down his neck and his chest. He was completely still and didn't say anything for a while so I looked up at his face. His expression seemed like he tried with all his strength not to fuck me on the spot. I laughed continuing to suck on his neck. "Just. Give. Up. Already." I said planting a kiss after each word. Suddenly he lifted me in his arms and carried me to his bedroom. I felt like butterflies awoke in my stomach. I was so nervous and yet extremely excited. I gasped when he threw me on the bed and climbed onto me. "Seung-" he cut me off with a forceful kiss. I opened my mouth and let him slid his tongue in. His dominant self was awakening a fire deep inside me and I wanted him even more. My body was becoming extremely hot and everywhere he touched he'd initiate a fire inside me. He trailed kisses down my neck and went towards my breasts. I moaned pushing my breasts against his lips. He backed away and looked at me with fiery eyes. "Don't do that, I won't be able to contain myself." His voice shuddered and the passion in his eyes only made me more eager to become his. I was getting a bit irritated that he was containing himself so much but then I got a great idea. I was grateful I had my purple shirt on me today because it just happened to have three buttons on its cleavage. So I pulled the shirt until the buttons didn't pop out. I felt utter satisfaction as he trailed his gaze down to my overexposed décolletage and slowly licked his upper lip. I trailed my finger over my shirt. "I want you to kiss me... here." I stopped my finger right above the shirt where the line between my breasts was. He gulped not taking his eyes off of my chest as he slowly got down and kissed me right where I pointed him to. I moaned louder this time pushing my head deeper into the pillow. His hand crawled under my shirt and he lifted it above my breasts. I took the shirt's edges and pulled it over my head. He took a moment to appreciate the view of me lying under him in just my bra. I felt my cheeks getting hot and I thought how I will never get used to being naked in front of him, and this was not only the first, but not even the second time I was shirtless in front of him. Not to mention he already saw me in my most provocative lingerie. Remembering all of that still didn't make me feel less embarassed. I covered my face with my hands as he planted kisses all over my waist. I shivered under his warm breath that was getting more and more rapid. I saw him undoing his belt and taking it off. He trailed the belt over my body and left it on the pillow by my side. Then he took my hands and put them above my head. "Do you trust me?" he asked me with his deep voice full of desire. "Yes." I moaned. I closed my eyes as he used his belt to tie my hands over my head and fasten them to the grill of the bed. When he was done he brushed his lips on my ear. "I love you." He whispered. I yelped loudly and lustfully. His voice was so sensual and his tingly breath on my ear drove me insane. He backed away looking at me with amusement. "That was an unexpected reaction." He grinned playfully. "What...what're you...up to?" I groaned helplessly. "Let's test it." He said and went back for my ear. He bit the cartilage of my ear and I whimpered in pleasure. The more he licked and bit on my ear the louder my moans became. I was struggling with his belt because the desire to touch him became unbearable and his tongue was driving me over the edge. I needed him, and I needed him inside me right now! I pulled the belt with force a few times and finally it got loose and I freed my hands, happy that he didn't tie them firmer. I grabbed his shoulders and turned him on his back, climbing onto him so that now I was on top. I took a second to pull myself together because I felt weak and drained. He laughed. "You look pretty satisfied." He said. I gave him a playful grin. "My turn." I said and kissed him. I took his belt and did the same with his hands what he did with mine. Only I made sure he's properly tied and won't get loose so easily. He looked at me from underneath with a seductive smile. I started kissing his neck and took my time slowly progressing towards his pants. I easily unbuttoned his jeans and took them off. Once I was there I didn't waste time, I pulled his underwear down and exposed his hard, pumping member. I bit my lower lip looking at it, it was so big. I took it in my hand and started to stroke it, at first very slowly and then faster. "For fuck's sake Annabelle!" he shouted while his body shuddered under my touch. I smiled to myself and decided to make things even more satisfactory. I licked the tip and he moaned in sweet agony. "Fuck!" he shouted and I put the tip in my mouth, circling around it with my tongue. All the time I was looking at his face while he helplessly groaned in pleasure. I sucked the tip and drew a small amount of cum. I licked it all and pushed the cock deeper in my mouth. He moaned louder and punched the grill of the bed, obviously frustrated because he couldn't get loose. I smiled in myself and pushed deeper. He closed his eyes shut and inhaled sharply. I was so pleased with myself that I started pumping him again with both my mouth and hand. He punched the bed grill again and it broke in half. I lifted my head in surprise, in a flash he gripped my shoulders and pushed me on the bed. He was huffing like crazy and he seemed to have lost control. He struggled with my zipper so I unzipped it for him and he pulled both my pants and underwear off. "Lift your hips." He ordered. I did as he told me and he placed his member in between my legs. "Are you ready?" he composed himself for a moment to ask that. I nodded feeling the heat coming all the way to my face, I can't believe I'm blushing right now, after all that just happened. He placed a kiss on my lips and pushed himself in me. I gasped, his member was so hot and I could feel it filling me from the inside. It wasn't really pleasurable like the rest of the things we just did, probably because it was my first time, so it felt unpleasant, but it wasn't as painful as I feared either. He pushed it in really slowly and stopped on half. "Are you ok?" he asked seeing my furrowed eyebrows. "Yeah, don't stop." I moaned. He pushed his member in deeper and I gripped the sheets underneath me. When he was completely in he started to move, at first slowly but then he picked up the pace. I gasped and moaned not being able to think straight, with every pump it felt so much better. I moaned and gasped holding onto the sheets like hanging from a thread. For a moment I opened my eyes and the whole room was blurry except for him, so beautiful lying above me and looking at me with lust, concern, care and above all love. Suddenly I felt like my body was crashing from the inside. I groaned in pleasure as a sweet feeling filled my every cell. He fell on top of me, coming at the same time. We were both drenched in sweat and huffed from the thrill. He pulled it out a second later and laid down beside me. We were both staring at the ceiling, my body was completely numb and I bet his was too. "You came to your senses?" I teased him, seeing he totally lost it back there. He laughed. "Don't think I missed even a second of what just happened." He said and looked at me. I looked at him too, his eyes were literally glowing, and his skin seemed...radiant? I watched as his mouth formed a hypnotizing, childlike smile. It was so wide and it showed off all of his beautiful white teeth. Never before did he smile so sincerely and widely in front of me. My smile grew too as I watched him giggle like a little child. When I saw him so happy I couldn't help but feel boundlessly happy myself. A new feeling awoke inside me, a feeling his smile gave me. It was hope, I was sure it was. I knew now that with time his smile would bring us nothing but happiness. I brushed my fingers against his cheek and his piercing eyes gave me all of his attention. "You have no idea how much I love you." I said. He took my hand and kissed it gently. "I have a pretty good idea." He replied.

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A/N:

Heey, I hope you lot didn't freak out just now, I know this chapter was pretty...intense? Maybe I should have put a bigger warning at the beggining of the chapter... something like: RED ALERT!! #IFYOUCAN'THANDLESMUTTHANSKIPTHISCHAPTER!
Oooook....Well, for those who liked it maybe you can tell me what you think?
And of course thank you all for your votes and comments!! I highly appreciate them!! ^^ <3