Memoirs of A Healer/Clinical Social Worker: Autobiography of Bruce Whealton

Chapter 50: Memories of Success In Life and In My Career as Therapist

A General Feeling of Success and Happiness

[Disclaimer: I have used aliases to protect the confidentiality and identity of clients or patients. No other names have been changed.]

The year was 2000, and life was going great for me. I was successful in all areas of my life. I had been living with the love of my life, Lynn, as husband and wife for several years now. This was evidence of success for me.

To be loved and to love another person was part of what I had always wanted in life.

I had the career that was meant for me as well. It was only through hard work that I had achieved this success. I never took for granted all that I had accomplished. Sixteen years ago in 1984, I would not have considered social work because I had been so shy and as a result, I lacked social skills. That was a lifetime ago.

I had come so far. Everything felt right. Now. At this moment! In the early spring of 2000. I had no idea that things were about to change.

I had a client base that was large enough to keep me busy forty, fifty, or more hours per week. That was okay, I loved the work.

It might seem surprising that someone like me who has a great deal of empathy would feel "good" when I am spending time with people who are dealing with severe depression, for example. I could resonate with others and their feelings and experiences. I felt with others what they were feeling and experiencing.

However, it does feel good to know that you are helping another person to cope with psychological problems like major depression.

So, yes, it feels "good" to spend time with people who are dealing with negative emotions... if you can help them.

The Importance of My Role

I would reflect upon my role as a mental health professional and the importance of that role in the lives of others.

If someone came for family therapy or couple's counseling, I felt like I had a solemn role in the family or in the relationships between two people. A couple was paying me to help them to live in harmony and to have a healthy relationship with one another.

That responsibility or the importance of the role I played might seem more obvious to a layperson when dealing with serious psychiatric conditions or disorders. However, it never occurred to me that one client's issues were more important than anyone else's.

Concern for Others Mental Health More Important than Money...

The next statement will make sense to consider in light of later events in my life.

I remembered a particular conversation I had with a young woman who had anorexia, named Anne Marie. I had described this previously. I was meeting with her parents and her. I explained that a medical doctor should be the primary person that they contact about her health. I explained that I wanted to be helpful, and I supported Anne Marie, but her physical health is outside my area of expertise. I'm not a doctor and so all medical matters that concerned them must be discussed with their doctor, not with me.

I had known that my role and my billable hours with her would decrease as a result of this, but Anne Marie's health was so very important.

I knew that despite her starving herself, she wanted to live a life that was meaningful, and I hoped she would continue to see me from time to time for individual therapy, and she could and was invited to come to the groups I was having for persons with eating disorders, which she found very agreeable.

A Diverse Group Clients

I had so many different clients, dozens of them with different problems, issues, or disorders. Each of them had invested in me a solemn responsibility to care for their mental and physical health - their health and psyche as it were. It was a solemn responsibility indeed.