Memoirs of A Healer/Clinical Social Worker: Autobiography of Bruce Whealton

Chapter 29: Second Year Graduate Studies - Direct Services

My second internship would prove to be the most rewarding. All in all, during my second year of full-time graduate studies, I was feeling good about every aspect of my life. I was doing great in classes, in my internship, and at work.

A Master's in Social Work is a two-year program and so the second year is our final year. As I was saying, during our second year, we take classes and work in a setting that closely matches our primary interest area for where we want to work upon graduation.

An Epiphany - An Answer to a Question

I wanted to start with an insight that I had gained during a class that was titled "Abnormal Psychology." I touched on this a bit earlier, but I wanted to add a few things. Anyway, in this class, we studied and learned about the entire range of psychiatric disorders as they are described in the DSM-IV (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Psychiatric Disorders, fourth edition).

We used a big book that is used by psychiatrists and other mental health professionals to make a diagnosis.

Anyway, when we started covering personality disorders, that's when I had an epiphany.

We were considering public figures as examples of people who may have a particular personality disorder. Some people on YouTube seem to walk on eggshells when it comes to speculating about the disorders of public figures. I don't think our professor was quite so worried about making an error in diagnosing someone. I suppose our professor wasn't speaking to a large audience nor was he making a definitive diagnosis.

I remember we discussed OJ Simpson as an example of someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. We were also encouraged to consider people we might know who might have a variety of different personality disorders. The thinking was that this would make things more clear and easier to understand.

There are some rules in the US that discourage diagnosing public figures. Those "rules" do not seem to be hard absolute rules.

With regard to personality disorders, it's not rocket science nor is it necessary that you sit down with someone to make a diagnosis. Another argument is that the person being diagnosed should be seeking treatment. Sometimes people are involuntarily committed to a psychiatric hospital and so they didn't seek treatment or a diagnosis.

Mental health professionals make observations, gather information from people other than the person being diagnosed.

Anyway, it was in this class when it hit me!

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is the problem that my mother had. The questions that had racked my brain for decades finally had an answer or an explanation. I don't know if this diagnosis of the problems that Kathy Whealton had would have been helpful earlier but at least I had a sense of clarity as to what was wrong.

In many ways my father, Bruce Sr. seemed to have the same condition. It wasn't so obvious with him though.

It was obvious that my mother could not see things from a different point of view.

That is the difference that I noticed with my mother. She NEVER could come forward and say, "I am sorry for the way I acted... that was wrong."

There is more to it than these observations. Both parents had a condescending and judgmental attitude toward others. Only certain "special" people could meet their high standards for being worthy of their attention.

These are symptoms of NPD or characteristics of a narcissistic family.

Anyway, I do not say these things with an angry heart. Nor is this an effort to make my parents look bad. This epiphany was an answer to a question I have been asking for the past 15 years or so.