Sunny Side Up - JJ Maybank

14

It had been a few weeks since I last saw JJ and although I was angry at him for walking out like that; I still missed him and so did Flora. I didn't realise what an important part of both of our lives he was until he was gone. I tried ringing him and texting his phone but he would never respond, and none of the other Pogues had heard from him in a while either. Rafe had stayed true to his word and made every court meeting and scheduled visit with Flora. Sarah was there initially to monitor them but Flora always seemed to enjoy her time with Rafe and he gave me no reason not to trust him. It was too difficult to try and explain that Rafe was her dad, as she'd been calling JJ daddy for a while, so she just called him 'uncle Rafey' for now, until she was old enough to understand. Rafe had really stepped up and had offered to have Flora more since JJ wasn't around, he was looking after her the night I finally saw JJ again and I was so grateful he was when I saw the state of JJ.

It was well past 11pm and I was in the middle of watching TV when there was a frantic knock at my door; I was in half a mind to ignore it because I was alone and worried something bad would happen – but part of me hoped it was JJ so I cautiously opened the door.

"I thought I knew what I was doing, okay? But I messed up," he whispered, his voice cracking with emotion.

"JJ! A-are you okay? What happened?" I asked worriedly, taking in the sight of his cut and bruised body – he was practically holding himself up on my doorframe and all the anger I had at him disappearing on me like that vanished when I saw how injured he was.

"JJ," I croaked, I'd never seen him this badly hurt before. Almost all of his face was split and bloody and his arm was at a weird angle, the knuckles on his other hand bruised and bloody from where he'd tried to defend himself; or threw the first punch at whoever it was.

I took his arm and ushered him inside, trying to get him to explain what had happened but he was just rambling and pacing, anger seeping off of him so I kept my distance.

"JJ talk to me, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's going on."

"I got in a fight with my dad," he started, and I waited for him to continue.

"He blamed me for mom leaving so I told him that I wished it was him who left instead. He – he didn't take it too well as you can see," he let out a dark chuckle which turned into a choked sob.

"Oh love," I comforted, placing my hand on his arm in reassurance but he flinched away.

"My own fucking dad doesn't love me, Sunny, how do I expect anyone else to? I-I tried so hard to be a good dad for Flora but I fucked that up as well. I've got nothing going for me so I'm just gonna drink my problems away, alright? Leave me alone."

He turned for the door and I realised now that he was drunk; I'd been so focused on his injuries I hadn't noticed the distant look in his eyes, or smelt the beer on his blood-soaked clothes. It explained why he'd changed so quickly on me but I still wanted to help him; even if he was going to be a pain in the ass about it.

"You know just as well as I do that you need help, so let me help you," I begged.

Tears were freely streaming down his face but he was too unstable for me to try and comfort him unless he let me in.

"JJ stay the night, please, we can talk about-"

"No Sunny stop trying to control my life!" he yelled, as I watched him fall apart in front of me.

"JJ just stay the goddamn night! I'm not letting you home like this and you came here for a reason so stop being so fucking stubborn about this."

Something shifted in him when I raised my voice and my face softened when he flinched at my tone.

"Please, J, for me."

He nodded finally and let me take his hand to lead him inside.