Alexandra Hamilton

Say No To This

AN: Yo! So obviously there's gonna be sex in this chapter. Nothing too explicit, but it'll still be suggestive. You've been warned.

Burr's POV

There's nothing like summer in the city. Someone in distress meets someone looking pretty. There's trouble in the air. You can smell it. And Alexandra's by herself. I'll let her tell it.

Alexandra's POV

Oh god, I really don't wanna relive this.

I hadn't slept in a week. I was weak, I was awake. You'd never seen a bastard orphan more in need of a break. Longing for Angelica, missing my spouse. That's when Mr. Mark Reynolds walked into my house.

He said, "You are a woman of such honor. I'm so sorry to bother you at home, but I don't know where to go. And I came here all alone." I could tell that he'd been drinking. He said, "My wife's been doing me wrong, leaving me, cheating me, mistreating me. Suddenly she's up and gone. I don't have the means to go on."

He continued to tell me how his wife didn't love him; how she took his money and left with their daughter. I felt bad for him. So I offered him a loan. I offered to walk him home. Given his inebriated state, I figured it would be better if I assisted him. He said, "You're too kind, ma'am."

I gave him thirty bucks that I had socked away. He lived a block away. He said, "This one's mine, ma'am."

Then I said, "Well, I should head back home."

He turned red. He led me to his bed, made my legs spread and said, "Stay...."

"Hey...." I breathed out.

"Hey...." he whispered, tucking a few stray hairs behind my ear.

That's when I began to pray. Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don't know how to say no to this. But my god, I feel so helpless. And his body's saying "hell yes."

He pushed me down onto the bed and I couldn't deny the attraction that I was feeling. There was something about the way he pouted his lips that hypnotized me.

Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don't know how to say no to this.

In my mind, I'm trying to go.

Go! Go! Go! Every instinct I have tells me to leave.

Then his mouth is on mine and I don't say no.

No! No! Say no to this!

I'm hit with complete shock as his lips join mine, but it only takes a few seconds for me to melt into it.

No! No! Say no to this!

He's right on top of me. My breath is shaky.

No! No! Say no to this!

He begins to unlace my corset. I let him strip me until I'm in nothing but my shift.

No! No! Say no to this!

His hands cup my breasts and I'm gone. I've committed sin.

I wish I could say that was the last time. I said that last time. It became a pastime. Most of those times he came to me. I don't know why I kept doing it. A month into this endeavor, I received a letter from a Mrs. Jane Reynolds. Even better, it said,

Dear ma'am,

I hope this letter finds you in good health and in a prosperous enough position to put wealth in the pockets of people like me down on their luck. You see, that was my husband you decided to—

Fuuuuuuuuuuu— My breath stopped and I paused my reading. How did she find out!? I looked back down at the letter, dreading what it would say next.

Uh oh! You made the wrong woman a side hoe. So time to pay the piper for the pants you unbuckled. And hey, you can keep being a whore if the price is right. If not, I'll ruin your life!

I hid the letter and I raced to his place, screamed, "How could you!?" In his face.

He said, "No, ma'am." Half dressed, apologetic, a mess, he looked pathetic, he cried, "Please don't go, ma'am." He sunk to the floor, sobbing crocodile tears into my dress.

"So was your whole story a set up?" I questioned him, although I already knew the answer.

"I don't know about any letter!" Was his claim, but I never mentioned a letter. I simply blamed him for exposing our ordeal to his wife.

"Stop crying, goddammit! Get up!" I shrieked.

"I didn't know any better!" He took my hand and pulled me down to the floor with him. By this time I had stopped listening to him.

"I am ruined!"

"Please don't leave me—"

"I am helpless!" So many agonizing thoughts spoken aloud! "How could I do this!?"

He managed to collect himself and brought his hands to the sides of my head, staring at me with those eyes; those cursed, sickly sweet eyes. "Just give her what she wants and you can have me."

He's insane if he thinks I'm going to continue with this scandal. Swatting away his hands I told him, "I don't want you." I had to keep saying it to make sure the message got through to him... or perhaps to me. "I don't want you! I don't—"

He put a finger to my lips and gripped my waist. "Whatever you want.... If you pay, you can stay...."

I shut my eyes tight and bit my tongue in anguish as I prayed again. Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don't know how to say no to this. But the situation's helpless. And his body's screaming "hell yes". Lord, show me how to say no to this.

How can I say no to this? There is nowhere I can go. When his body's on mine, I do not say no.

No!

He led me back into the bedroom and shut the door with maniacal speed. He held me so tightly as he forced his body against mine. I was opposed to continuing the affair, but the pressure of his body made me let out an involuntary "Yes!"

Say no to this! No!

"Yes!" I moaned as his kisses made their way down to my neck and eventually to my collarbone.

Say no to this! No!

Another "Yes!" escaped me when he practically ripped my layers off and lifted me.

Say no to this! No!

"Yes!" His lust clouded eyes burned into my soul right before he began to rock, making fierce love to me; the most vigorous I'd ever experienced.

Say no to this!

When we were finished he got up and put his clothes back on without a word. I did the same and headed home. Early the next day, I was disturbed by a knock at the door. I answered it and found none other than Mark Reynolds looking strangely unmoved; a completely different man than the one who came to me begging for help. His wife was at his side, seething, but still managing to maintain her composure.

"So?" She said only one word, but it carried so much weight. I knew exactly what she meant and I was forced to make a decision. Would I let this woman blackmail me and fiscally bind herself to me, or would I allow her to tell my husband of the adultery that took place? I had no doubt that she would tell him and possibly others if I didn't meet her demands. What would I do then? My reputation would be tarnished and my honor stripped from me. I knew what I had to do.

I retreated back into the house and collected the money she had requested. Handing it to her, I muttered, "Nobody needs to know."

She nodded, assuring me that she was a woman of her word and would stay silent. As she extended her hand to take the money, I noticed a dark spot on her forearm— a bruise. Then I noticed another on her shoulder— and another. I looked to Mark, horrified. He showed me a sly and subtle smirk and turned around with his wife.

I shut the door and slid to the floor in shame and despair. What have I gotten myself into?