A Hard Habit To Break

Chapter 10 - SPG

OLIVIA

His kisses went down to my swollen eyes, to my nose, and from one cheek to another. He was doing it with so much care he could give. I put down my wineglass on the marble table and held his arms, enveloping my face. Napaangat ang ulo ko at tinignan siya sa mata. We both stared at each other for a moment, and he bent down to kiss me again, this time to my lips.

He's kissing me passionately like he always did when everything was still a fairytale and that he was my prince charming to me, long before this all happened. I didn't respond to his kisses. I felt empty inside and all the emotions I'm feeling right now are doing me no good at all.

Nalilito ako at mas lalong hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit nagpapadala ako sa mga halik at haplos na ginagawad niya sa'kin. Pwede ko naman siyang itulak at umalis na lang at tuluyan siyang kalimutan. Pero hindi sumusunod ang katawan ko sa mga sinasabi ng utak ko. Una pa lang alam ko nang kahinaan ko na ang magmahal Dahil sino ba ang hindi?

Sobra-sobra ako kung magmahal na kahit sarili ko ay hindi ko na nagagawang mahalin pa. Tanga ako at mahina kapag sa taong mahal ko. Dahil din doon ay sobra-sobra rin ako kung masaktan na tila ba wala ng natitira sa'kin dahil ibinubuhos ko lahat sa pagmamahal at tiwala, na sa isang iglap ay kayang durugin at sirain ng pagtataksil. Mahal ko si Peter. Mahal na mahal ko pa rin siya.

Hindi ko pa rin kayang kalimutan at alisin siya sa puso't isipan ko lalo pa't lagi siyang nagpaparamdam kung kailan nagsisimula na akong gawin ang mga iyon. Pero sapat na ba ang lahat na nararamdaman ko, ngayong magkasama kami muli, para mapatawad ko siya at kalimutan na lang ang lahat ng sakit at pagdurusa na nararamdaman ko ngayon?

I gasped. "Peter..." I stared at his closed eyes and moved inches away from him, but he never let me. "Let's stop this. This isn't right." He didn't open his eyes, and I knew he clearly heard what I said. Yumuko siya at ipinagdikit ang aming mga noo, akala ko ay titigil na siya. I was too shocked when he pulled me towards his body and kissed me again, and this time with so much ferocity.

"Kiss me back, babe. Please," he said between his kisses. I was hesitant to do it but later on, I gave in to his sweet kisses.

He held me even tighter and had deepened the kiss much more. Ang kaliwang kamay niya ay nasa likod ng bewang ko at ang kanang kamay niya naman ay nasa likod ng ulo ko. He's tugging my hair downward with a bit force so he could kiss me harder. Sobrang magkalapit ang aming mga katawan na kahit hangin ay mahihiyang dumaan.

I encircled my hands to his neck and his warm kisses carried me away. He's slowly grinding his crotch to my sensitive part, and it's giving me so much sensation than it already is. His hand pressed my left butt and went down to caress my upper leg. He pulled it upward so I could encircle it to his torso.

We're fervently kissing each other, and once in a while, we breathe for some air. Wala sa amin ang gustong bumitaw at hindi ko rin alam sa sarili ko kung bakit hindi ko ito kayang pigilan. My heart is beating fast.

My hands are shaking as I traced and locked his hair in between my fingers. Oh god! Tell me this is wrong! Patawarin Niyo ako kung masyado akong marupok at hindi ko kayang tiisin ang lalaking kanaig ko ngayon. I might be confused with what's happening to me right now, but I can fully understand that it's really hard to unlove him.

His right hand went back to my waist and doing some wanders. It went upward and slightly passed through my left breast. His right fingers are teasingly caressing my upper chest, which makes me wanting for more. I didn't know I was now also grinding my groin to his.

When he felt like he ignited the fire in me, he then cupped my left breast and slowly caressed it. He's making circles around my nipple in between his forefinger and thumb. We're not both naked yet, but the sensation I feel is already too much for me to get wet down there.