Just in case || Draco Malfoy

Eighteen - Not This Time

"Maybe that's it. We eventually go numb; because you can't break a heart that's already broken."

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Snape had forced me to promise to keep my word. He had a certain look in his eyes that made me trust him, but I can't think for the love of god why.

The water on the floor had entirely disappeared as a result of Snapes spell, the water seemingly evaporating off of our clothes as well as the floor. Draco was healed from injury, but he struggled to think straight - the spell wasn't fatal thanks to Snape, but it still left him in a considerate amount of pain.

"He won't be fit for the next several hours." Snape said while helping me get Draco to his feet. "Take him to his dorm, let him sleep. Keep him there. Do not let him leave until eight tonight. Tell him he is to report immediately to me. You will not follow him. Anyone questions you on your way, lie. Do not tell them what has happened."

I didn't question Snapes instructions. He had no intention of answering my questions. But he had threatened me before, telling me that telling anyone about what Harry had done would only put Draco in danger. Though he stubbornly refused to tell me why. Much like with everything that involved Draco. But I didn't want to risk it. If there was even a chance that my actions would hurt him more, then I would keep my mouth shut.

He could walk by himself, but was dazed, me having to hold him by the arm to direct him to the common room. Snape had departed the bathroom swiftly after he saw us fit to return to the common room after reminding me to send Draco to him at eight that night.

I didn't speak a word to him the whole way there. And he didn't to me, though I expected that - he could hardly walk in a straight line, never mind form a conversation.

I pulled him up the spiral stair case that led to his dormitory. It took a reasonable amount of time for me to navigate him up the stairs without him stumbling up over the steps. I reached his door and opened it pulling him inside with me.

I arranged his sheets quickly for him and allowed him to lay down on his bed. He almost collapsed on his back, closing his eyes in an exhausted defeat. He turned his head to face me as I sat down on top of his small chest of drawers.

"Did he hurt you? Potter, did he hurt you?" He almost whispered, his voice hoarse and aching. I shook my head slightly to him. After my confirmation, he threw back his head and lay still as he slept.

...

"Helena?"

I was sat in the windowsill looking down on the students that gathered on the side of the black lake. Draco's voice pulled me out of my trance.

I turned to face him - he had woken up from his sleep that had lasted little under two hours. I hadn't left the room in fear of anything else happening to him or anyone getting to him.

Hearing his words, I got down from the windowsill. He seemed better, though he was rubbing the back of his head to try and soothe the ache in it.

He sat up on the edge of the bed and looked up at me. I stood in front of him with my arms folded.

"Are you ok? Did Potter hurt-" he repeated.

"No he didn't." I interrupted him. He looked at me in surprise. I couldn't help but feel tears prick the back of my eyes.

"Are you ok?" He said, beginning to get to his feet.

"Sit down" I said before he could fully get to his feet.

"Wha- what's wrong? What happened?" He said while resuming his seat on the bed. I looked at him, the tears beginning to pile up in my eyes but I didn't let them spill.

"Enough." I said. He looked at me in confusion. "What the hell happened in that bathroom? Why were you trying to kill each other?" I said with shaking breath. He tilted his head to face the floor.

"You know this. I can't tell you"

"Why?!" I yelled. I couldn't stop the tear rolling down my cheek. He stood up and began to walk to me, but I held out my hand stopping him. "No Draco. You can't pass this off. I haven't questioned you once. I haven't asked you anything. But this is too far. You need to tell me what the hell is happening" I said with more and more tears rolling down the side of my face.

"Don't you think I want to?!" He yelled suddenly making me jump slightly. "All I want is to tell you. I hate keeping it to myself. But it has to be done. I can't put you in danger." He attempted to wrap his arms around my waist but I refuses his touch.

"But you are the one in danger! I want to help you. But I can't. Not if you don't tell me!" He turned his face away from me, his eyes screwed together to attempt to stop his crying.

"You would hate me." He said lowly.

"Draco what can it possibly be?" I walked to him. I placed my hand on the side of his cheek making him lock his teary eyes with me. "It's not like your a murderer! Whatever it is. I can help you. But please" I ran my thumb across the ashy skin on his cheek. "You have to tell me."

He stared into my eyes with such a pain that it tore me apart. His lip was quivering, struggling to not break down. He began to shake his head. Not in a dismissive way, quickly in a way that showed me he was being torn apart, not wanting to tell me but longing to at the same time.

He stepped back from me leaving my arm reaching out to him.

"I'm so sorry" he whispered. He undid the button on the sleeve on his shirt and rolled back the fabric exposing his forearm.

I felt as though my throat was tightening itself. I was struggling to breath though there was nothing physically choking me. No. I don't believe it. It's not real. That smoky tattoo of a snake entwined around a skull can't be real. He can't be...

"I didn't have a choice" he pulled his sleeve back over the mark. "Please Helena, you have to believe me." He said with desperation.

He stepped towards me and I stumbled back, my breath rate increasing ever higher with each second. I stumbled, unable to stop my legs from shaking beneath me.

"Helena please". He reached his hand out to me but I stumbled backwards desperately to avoid him. I had my back pressed up against the door. He stopped advancing on me and lowered his arm. He looked into my eyes with longing. "Please".

As soon as my fumbling hand found the door handle, I grabbed it harshly and pulled on it with all my force thrusting the door opened. My shaking legs found the strength to run out, slamming it shut behind me.

I ran from him as fast as I could. I clutched onto the bannister for dear life as I stumbled down the stairs trying to keep myself upright.

No no no. This is a bad dream. It can't be real. There is no way.

But of course. It was real as the dark lord himself.

...