Just in case || Draco Malfoy

Twenty Eight - I Guess You're Right

"It takes great courage to see the world in all its tainted glory and still to love it"

-Oscar Wilde

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

I had only worsened things for myself. My friends, the only people I had now, I had thrown out in a moment of anger and was too proud to apologise.

It had been two nights since the night when I got angry with the others. The hardly bearable days had now become even worse now that I was eating alone and spending my night isolated in my dorm. I read my books, but not even those could help me escape reality now - it was consuming me at this point.

Draco had kept his word - he didn't utter a single word to me and avoided me in the halls. It felt hauntingly familiar to the beginning of the school year - only this time I was thankful for it. I was. I didn't want to talk to him.

I kept repeating it to myself.

I didn't want to speak to him.

I didn't want to see him.

I hate him.

The days where I had the dark arts were the worst - I hadn't had one since that night. The days where we had lessons with our usual teachers such as Professor McGonagal, Professor Slughorn and Professor Flitwick were the days were we would have a few hours away from the evil in the school. We would all keep a low volume in these classes, often using them as a few hours to be able to get away from the death eaters and cruel prefects - that was if the lessons weren't 'inspected' by the death eaters. Even some of the teachers seemed terrified when such figures polluted the room.

...

I heard a soft knock on my dorm door. I quickly wiped the tears from my cheeks before yelling out

"Who is it?" I heard the latch on the door open and as it did, I saw the figure of Eddie stood at the doorway.

"The prefects are out. Jack managed to sneak in some extra food" he said lowly. "Just thought I'd let you know if you want some"

I ran up from the bed and immediately threw my arms around Eddie. He stumbled backwards and stood still, not hugging me back. I hugged him tightly regardless, my tears falling down my cheeks and onto his shirt.

"Eddie I'm sorry. I'm sorry I snapped. I just- I hate this. I'm sorry I hate not speaking to you, all of you" I let out several muffled cries. I wasn't over fond of showing such emotion but this was one of those occasions where it couldn't be helped. I felt his arms wrap around me.

"Come on" he said as I pulled back to look at him. "I'm not angry. I'm sorry too, you know for the Malfoy stuff" he smiled at me. "Come on before it's all gone". I pulled him in for one last hug before we made our way down the steps.

"You know as much as I hate to admit it, I think you are right" I said as we were halfway down the steps. He looked at me confused.

"Huh? About what?" He said.

"Malfoy. I do miss him." He looked at me, shocked by what I had just said. "Not the death eater. Before I knew. I don't even know if it's him that I miss - I just miss those feelings. Before... you know. All this"