Collections of The Soul

"I'm sorry"

I'm sorry that I counted too much on you, thought you could hold the world, and my own burdens too. 

I'm sorry that I'm not perfect, but then again, is there really such a thing?

I'm sorry I wasted your time, but you said you'd always be there for me.

You told me I could tell you anything, so then why is it you're doing this to me?

Picking up the pieces of what's left behind, scrambling and trying to find my mind. 

Family is what we were, unstoppable and happy.

Or was it a masquerade? A sick game to trap me? 

I'm sorry I got scared, afraid and unsure.

 So many fingers pointing at me, reminding me I was weak and insecure.

 Was I really that toxic? Just waste and impure? 

That's not what the memories tell me, we were friends, a family for sure.

 Laughter and good times, sad times, sick times when we thought there wasn't a cure.

We held each other up, not tore each other down.

 So then why am I sitting here, with this unmovable frown?

I feel so stupid, foolish, like a freak show clown. 

Thinking I could trust so easily, that I had people who would fight the world for me.

I'm sorry for what happened, I mean it, can't you see?

 I'm sorry...I'm sorry...

Too much I've said sorry, over and over, starting to feel like a broken record. 

I realize now that part of my life is done, been trying to put it behind me, it's over. 

Then something comes along, and reminds me of the memories, and I find myself crying "Why'd you go, stay, please?"

Lessons in life are sometimes harder than most, I'm tired of looking at the past, seeing that ghost. 

What's done is done, it's time to move on.

 Time to put it behind me, and not let myself worry.

This time I'm going to say it, and meant it fully.

I'm not sorry.