Lost On You : Marthe Woertman LGBTQ+ Fanfic

26

Marthe.

Vanessa is actually a good therapist. I've seen her twice, but I like her. She agrees I shouldn't let go of Maxine. I found out Sybil's taking Maxine to the formal, which I nearly fought her over, but Sienna offered, and I'm using her to see Maxine. Call me shallow, but I know Maxine needs one night of fun without me trying to ruin it. I wonder what kind of dress she'll wear.

"Marth, what about this?" Sienna asked, taking me out of my thoughts. Sienna and the rest of the sorority decided to go shopping for their dresses together, but because I'm Sienna's "date", I got dragged along for the ride. Sienna offered me fake apologies for Maxine dumping me, but you and I know she could care less. I'm not back on my old bullshit. I have to be better for Maxine.

How can I be better for Maxine when she yelled at me at school for everyone to see and hear? I am never getting out of this shit house. She yelled at me and threw her drink on me a week ago. I deserved that.

"It's great," I said, not looking up from my wallpaper of Maxine, but I know the dress is short and tight.

"You didn't even look," I am going to a dance with the straightest girl in the world. Looking up, I was right. Not my cup of tea, but if Maxine were in it, I'd drool over it.

"I like it," I lie.

"But the white dress was better," I said, referring to a long, white, silky dress. It was a deep plunge with thin straps and leg slits.

"Really? It's not too white?" Sienna asked, looking at the beautiful dress. I already bought my suit, and it's all black. I'm going to this dance to mourn the loss of my girlfriend. I'm going to watch another woman hold her, dance with her, and make her night. I have one more final, and I'll be done. I wonder how Maxine will do her hair. Will it be up, complementing her neck, or will it be down in beautiful black and white waves?

Whatever she wears, she'll look good. I know Sybil will treat her right, and she's lucky because I've never slow danced with Maxine. Maxine said we could be friends, but then she ghosted except to pay her half of the rent. Maxine doesn't speak to me in class and ignores me when getting coffee. She claims she needs to focus on her finals, but I know that's bullshit. Maxine is on the dean's list. I didn't think it'd be this hard. Fuck me.

Fuck this, fuck that, fuck it. Just fuck.

Tonight I'm going to dance with a woman I have no feeling towards, and I will suck it up. Maxine didn't say she wanted space, but her actions did... and Sybil told me.

"Marth, where are you?" Sienna asked, waving her hand in front of my face.

"I'm right here," I point out, but I know she doesn't mean physically.

"No, mentally," I knew that.

"I'm here," I lie again.

No, I'm thinking about the love of my life and how I possibly lost my future wife because I couldn't take some time to consider Maxine's feelings before acting on one of her fears, and how hot she'll look tonight, but I can't take her home or fucking dance with her.

"Whatever. I'm getting the white dress," Sienna brushed me off, sitting down with me, waiting on the rest of the sorority to get their dresses.

"Am I going home with you?" Sienna asked, and I know she wants to, but I promised myself I'm not fucking anyone but Maxine. She's the only woman I want to make love to.

"No," I said, meaning it.

"Awe, baby," Sienna started.

"I'm not your baby," I said. When will she understand that I will never get with her? She's straight and not Maxine.