Nothing Lasts Forever (Phan)

Chapter 13

Dan POV

"Forget me Phil. I've already forgotten myself." I sob, before hanging up. Why had I answered?! 

"You alright?" Adrian asks concerned. I looked at my brother. 

"What do you fucking think?" I snap, then sigh. "I'm sorry, it's just-"

Adrian shakes his head. "You don't have to explain to me. I'm not going to pressure you to go home, no matter what my opinion is."

I smile gratefully. "What is your opinion?"

Adrian looks at me. "Honestly?"

I nod.

"Well, in my opinion, I think you should grow a pair of balls, go home to Phil, and if he's gonna reject you, then get rejected like a man and move on. And by the way, he won't reject you because from that phone there, before you interrupted him, he was going to say 'I love you'."

I look at Adrian in disbelief. "He wasn't." 

"Well maybe you guys aren't as close as you thought, because a deaf man would've heard that. But hey, that's just me." Adrian shrugs and leaves the room. 

I was lucky I had him. After I left Mum's I went to a hotel, but had a close call with some of what I think were the private investigators that were after me. I came here, because Adrian has always been like this, he'll keep his opinion's to himself unless you ask. Which I always do, because he never pressures you.

I felt like a wanted man, I couldn't leave the house in fear someone would see me, kidnap me and hold me ransom. Adrian made it seem so easy, just go back to Phil, say I love him, and take it on the chin if he doesn't say it back. And that whole thing about Phil was about to say it, there was no way.

There were also the videos. I hadn't been watching them, I didn't want to feel guiltier than I already did, but I knew Phil had been uploading short, unedited videos everyday. I knew Adrian watched them, but I had asked him not to tell me what they contained. You could see he really wanted to, but he wasn't that guy. He was all about letting people make up their own mind. I think it might have come out of his being gay.

When he first realized he was gay, and that he liked his best friend, he tried to convince himself he wasn't gay, then gave up and tried to convince his friend he was gay. In the end, Adrian ended up with a broken heart, and took months to get over it. Ever since then, he had been so accepting and so easy going. Now he had a boyfriend called Raymond, who was really cool, and had been sworn to secrecy about my whereabouts. I picked up my phone again, and found lots of missed calls from Phil, and a new video on his channel. I didn't click on it, but stared at the thumbnail. It was Carrie and Louise holding the camera, looking like they were telling someone off, probably me. But that wasn't what was getting to me. It was Phil in the background. He was with Joey and Alfie,  and to any ordinary viewer he would've looked happy. But I straight away saw through the fake smile, and into the teary eyes staring at the camera, hoping I was staring back. And I was. 

"Shit." I hiss, wiping the tears away from my eyes. For a twenty three year old man I was crying entirely to much. 

"You know how to end this. I'm going down to the supermarket. You want anything?" 

Phil. 

I want to say. Instead I shake my head.

"Nothing you can buy." 

Adrian laughs and nods knowingly. 

"Okay lover boy. Stay away from windows, who knows where they'll be."

I grimace at the nickname, and watch as Adrian walks down the hallway. A second later he comes running back.

"Like on my fucking front lawn!" He hisses. My head shots up.

"What!" 

"Grab your shit and jump out the window, you're right next to fence, which is a hedge. Watch out for the neighbors dog, be quiet, I'll stall as long as I can.

I nod and run to my room. Quickly I toss everything into my suitcase and follow Adrian's instructions without a second thought. The window wasn't high off the ground, and the neighbors had a chihuahua. I couldn't go back to Adrian's house after this, one was the start of many. Where could I go?

You know how to end this.

Adrian's words from before now seemed like the only option, or taking the chance of going to Chris's house and convincing him not to rat me out to Phil. I rack my brain, but can't think of anything better other than checking into a different hotel every second day. I needed to work out what I was going to do long term, because I couldn't do this for the rest of my life. Although right now I was screwed until everyone lost interest, which would take ages if the phandom were involved. They were are powerful force that could not be stopped, this just proved it.

"Now is not the time to be wondering over the group of people you and Phil brought together Dan." I say to myself. I wander around town for a while, sticking to small roads and alley ways, unsure of what to do and where to go.

It was around five that night it happened. I was walking down a small back road I was sure I had been down before. I had to face it, I was completely and utterly lost. Just as I was about to start looking for the least deadly looking alley to sleep in, I heard someone behind me. The hairs on the back of my neck rose and I knew that it wasn't just someone walking on the street. It was someone walking on the street towards me.

"Dan?" A feminine voice calls tentatively from behind me. I wince, and slowly turn around. It was teenage girl standing a few metres away, dressed in an AmazingPhil shirt and one of my llama hats.

The jig is up Dan.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to tell anyone I promise." She holds up her hands. I look at the girl.

"Wait- Jess?" I suddenly realize it was the girl from the hospital roof. Jess smiles. 

"Hey."

"Hi. So, how come you're here, weren't you in Manchester the last time I saw you?" I frown. Jess's face falls.

"I live with my Dad now." She whispers. My mouth forms an 'o' as I realize what she means. Her mother had died. Without thinking, I open my arms and Jess steps forward, tears spilling over.

"I'm sorry Jess."

She sniffles. 

"Its not your fault."

But Phil's tears are.

"You need somewhere to stay?" Jess steps back wiping at her eyes. I study her with my eyes.

"You manage to sort that photo out?"

She smiles. "Everyone thinks its an edit."

"Then yeah, I could do with a bed."