Riptides (Fred Weasley Fan Fiction)

Prologue

Alt-J - Breezeblocks

Having heard so much about the shop, he couldn't miss the opportunity to visit it himself and purchase some fantastic gadgets useful for all kinds of pranks, both those innocent ones, used for giving your friend some red pimples on the nose, and those which surely leave the mark. It must be a paradise on Earth, he thought rushing through the Diagon Alley and leaving his worried parents behind. He passed the Flourish and Blotts, where he was supposed to buy the books he needed for his third year of Hogwarts, and Madam Malkin's shop with robes, and there is was. Almost knocking an older wizard with a funky robe on down, he run past another couple of shops, including the one where he wanted to get a new broom for Quidditch. He ran straight into a family speaking on some matter which seemed to have been rather urgent, apologized quickly, yelled at his parents to hurry up, and finally, the destination was ahead of him.

"Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes," said the sign. Exactly what he needed! Nosebleed Nougats, Fever Fudge, Screaming Yo-yos, love potions... Everything was behind the big blue door guarded by a figure of a smiling man with flaming red hair. No time to look at the displays! Let's go in!

"Paul!"

He heard the voice behind his back. Right, mom and dad. How could he forget? Surely, he didn't want to get lost somewhere in the Knockturn Alley, though, most importantly, he needed them to pay for the gadgets he was going to choose for himself.

"Will you stop running like crazy?" asked a woman dressed in a long, reddish, old-fashioned robe.

"How many times do I have to tell you? You'll get lost and you won't go to Hogwarts," added a tall man standing beside her, as if not going back to school was the biggest thread he could afford at this moment.

"Yes, yes, I know..." mumbled the boy. "Can we go in now, please? Have you seen all the things they have here? And who knows, maybe I'll meet the Weasleys!"

The man nodded smiling with a sense of relief on his face and opened the door so the boy could enter the shop. Suddenly, he didn't feel the urge to run around and stood astonished with all the products the shop offered. There was everything he'd dreamt about – from various toys, to items he could use to prank his teachers and friends once he's back at school. Looking at the shelves, a multitude of fantastic trick ideas started appearing in his head.

"Go on," hurried him his father. "We have a long shopping list still. Your mother and I will wait here, alright?"

He pointed at one of the dark blue sofas next to the window. The boy agreed and walked towards a display on his left which included some funky sweets. He took one of the boxes into his hand to examine it closely when he heard a farting sound from behind, followed by his dad saying something staring with "Bloody..." Paul smiled and thought to himself that they could have expected that in the best joke shop in England. He was excited, to say the least.

Not interested in any of the sweets on this shelf, he decided to look around the place more. On the righthand side, there was some more small displays with foods (which he knew were not regular snacks), books and some funny boxes with Merlin knows what inside. Some products were displayed on the shelves and cabinets, while others were still in the boxes and a dark-haired wizard was humping over them, possibly unpacking some new stuff. On the right, there was a big and heavy cash register, currently empty. However, then, he notices stairs leading to the second floor and a sign saying "Looking for the best stuff, huh? Come on up!" This was enough to encourage him to explore the upstairs of the shop.

Indeed, the sign was not lying. It seemed that it was the place to be! The second floor was way bigger than the downstairs, and, surely, had more stuff Paul may have been interested in. However, what first caught his attention was a big cage with some... thing. It looked like tiny cotton balls but was moving. "Pigmy Puffs," he read, "Watch out! May bite!" Paul took one step back but could not stop looking at the little things. He almost forgot why he came to the Weasley's shop in the first place!

"Can I help you somehow, little guy?" said someone behind Paul's back. Mesmerized by the "Pigmy Puffs," he jumped hearing the voice.

"I-I don't really know," answered the boy.

He turned back and saw a tall ginger man with a face full of small freckles, weirdly resembling the figure he saw at the door before.

"You're holding a baby," he noticed. Indeed, the man was holding an equally ginger baby dressed up in tiny overalls with a big letter W stitched on the chest.

"What's up with that? Cute, isn't he? Just like his father" the man answered proudly. "So, what are you looking for?"

"I've heard a lot about the shop. People said that I can get everything for pranks here." Paul put his hands into his pockets and stood straight, since, in his opinion, it makes him look more serious and older.

"I see. You want to continue the legacy, little guy?" A big smile appeared on the man's face. Paul didn't really know what legacy he was talking about but, for some reason, nodded. It was impossible not to notice, however, that he was still very much confused.

"Yes, sir," he said. "I want to be remembered at Hogwarts, just like the Weasley twins."

"Just like the Weasley twins, you say." If it was possible to smile even more, he did. "So what are you thinking about? Some U-No-Poos, or maybe, Fainting Fancies? Oh, I remember how we used those on our first year on Umbridge! Amazing effect, very easy to use. Just be careful not to overdose, because your victim may not wake up till next Christmas. Nosebleed Nougat is also fantastic and not dangerous at all. I mean, we usually just..."

"What's going on, Freddie?" A woman appeared out of nowhere, also holding a baby. Both were ginger and wore similar clothing – sweaters, which looked hand-made, with big letters on their chests. However, the woman had a big "L" on her sweater, while the baby was proudly wearing a "W."

"I was just speaking with a customer," answered the man glancing at the woman. "I was telling him about the golden days of Hogwarts and..."

"You also have a baby," Paul interrupted him, even though his parents taught him that it's rude to do so.

"What's up with that?" she asked smiling. "Two small ones – mine; the big one, Fred – also mine."

"O-okay..." muttered the boy, visibly overwhelmed with the situation.

"So, how can we help you?" asked the couple.

"Welcome to the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Need some help?" Paul heard another voice coming from the right. He looked there and was sure that he lost his mind. Now five ginger clerks wanted to offer him their help and soon enough he realized that he was speaking with the Weasleys' themselves.