Project Heartbreak - Charlie Gillespie {a.u.}

13.

July 15, 2018

I'm not completely sure what i've gotten myself into. For the past month, Ari has taken me to the mall everyday to find the "perfect" outfit for crashing Charlie's birthday. Though we had a little over a month to do so, she wanted everything done now.

The mall was crowded as usual, teens shopping for their latest summer outfit. I wish I was like one of those regular teenagers who go out and party during the summer. But instead I've been in bed, sulking in my sadness the same way i've been since Charlie and I broke up.

It sounds weird to say that we broke up. The relationship was finally starting to feel real and then it all came crumbling down. I hadn't seen Charlie since graduation and I wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not. Seeing him again would only bring me more guilt and shame, and I'd would break down all over again.

"What about this one?" Ari asked, holding up a blue velvet dress.

"I like that one," I smiled as she slid it under arm.

I continued to browse before finding the most perfect dress ever. It was a dark blue and was velvet just like the one Ari found. It had 6 buttons on the sides and lemme tell you, it was hot.

"Ari," I said holding up the dress.

"That's the one isn't it?" She asked as I vigorously shook my head, yes.

We hurried to the front counter, quickly paying, and walking out of the store in smiles. The mall was always another place I could just let me mind run wild. Rummaging through the clothes in different stores was kind of therapeutic, though I never bought anything.

The food court was rather busy as well as the rest of the mall. Everyone feeding themselves after what seemed like a long day of shopping. We made our way to the little pretzel stand near the store we were just at, hoping to get something in our stomachs before we collapsed.

"I'm starving," I groaned as I felt my stomach grumble.

"Me too," She said as we waited in line.

We got our pretzels and continued towards a table where we sat. The pretzel was warm and very salty, something I needed to boost my energy up. I knew Ari wanted to shop some more, so I needed all the energy I could get.

"Okay, we have a few more stores to go into then we should be done," She said smiling. "For today,"

"We have to come back?" I ask, choking on my pretzel.

"Yes, if this is going to be perfect we have to make you look perfect," She said taking a bite.

"Why can't I just be myself?" I asked, looking at her intently.

"I mean you could be, but you're boring. When you look confident, you feel confident," She said. "You're beautiful so what we're doing is extenuating it,"

"I guess so," I said, not sure of what she had in store.

"Don't look behind you," She said, which only made me turn around.

There he was, walking with his friends. Owen, Jeremy, and Madison at his sides, all laughing. My heart sunk and I quickly turned back around. I let my head fall and I felt tears build up in my eyes.

"Hey," Ari grabbed my hand. "It's gonna be okay. We're going to work everything out,"

I shook my head, not wanting to believe her. Charlie got me like no one else ever did. He understood everything about me and knew when something was up with me. I heard the four walk by and I shut my eyes with force.

"Have you talked to her since?" I heard Owen said.

So, they were talking about me.

"No, she's called a lot. But, i'm too scared to answer," Charlie said.

They continued to sit at the table a few feet from us, so I could still hear them.

"Are you listening to them right now?" Ari whispered to me.

I nodded my head as I continued to listen.

"What do you mean scared?" Madison asked.

"I mean she had a plan to break my heart. But when she was caught she said she was forced and she actually started to feel something for me. I couldn't tell what was real and what was fake at that point," He said, hurt obviously in his voice.

"I don't know Charlie, it seemed like she was pretty in love with you. Whether she was forced or not, she had real feelings for you. I could tell," Jeremy said, which caused a smile to form on my face.

"Maybe, but it still hurt," He said.

"I understand that, but did you ever give her a chance to explain herself?" Owen asked as I still kept my head down.

"No," He said.

"Maybe you should,"

"Wait. Is that her over there?" Madison asked as I still kept my head down.

"I think so," Charlie said.

"You should go talk to her," Jeremy said as I heard a hand on his back.

I looked up at Ari, my eyes wide. I quickly grabbed my things and stood up, avoiding eye contact with Charlie at all costs. Ari stood up as well, blocking him from my view. Which I was very thankful for.

I threw my bag over my shoulder as I made eye contact with him. My heart dropped as I quickly turned around, walking fast towards the exit.

"Mila!" I heard Charlie yelled behind me.

I kept walking. I wasn't sure if I was able to even speak to him without breaking down. My footsteps began to turn loud as I ran outside. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding and gasped for air.

"Mila," I heard him again from behind me.

"Charlie," I said turning around.

"Can we talk?" He asked as he scratched the back of his neck.

"You want to talk to me now?" I said as I grabbed my things I had just dropped.

"I was wrong for not letting you explain yourself that day and i've been beating myself up everyday for it," He said.

"Mila, let's go!" Ari said as she came out of the mall.

"We'll talk another time, okay?" I asked as he nodded his head.

"Mila," He said as I turned around to look at him. "I'm sorry,"