Soulmate

confused

Emily's pov

It's been 7 days since I met Grace. We've gotten closer and closer, we were spending whole days with each other, she leaves in the evening and she comes back at lunch.

My brother Simon was really excited to meet her because apparently, I talk about her all the time. I don't think I talk about her that much, he's just teasing me. He really liked her when they met for the first time yesterday.
My parents really like her too, especially my mom. She thinks she's very sweet.

After that first day, she started coming over to my house all the time, not just to hang out with me but also with my brother. It makes me so happy how well she gets along with him and my mom, because I usually have the feeling that my family don't really like my other friends.

Usually when she comes over we sit together in my room and we're watching movies in peaceful silence.

It's been only a week and even though I love hanging out with her, I still get really confused about my sexuality and about my feelings when I'm around her, and sometimes it really gets under my skin. She makes me feel a certain way that only a few other people have, and it is kinda weird because those people I dated, were only a guys. I wish I could talk to someone about it, but I'm kind of scared that if I talk about it, I'll figure something out about myself and my sexuality that I'm not really ready for right now. 

I always notice cute little things about her, like how when she's watching a movie she twirls her hair, and when she's thinking about something serious, she is biting her bottom lip.
Speaking of her lips, I always catch myself looking at them. I can't help it, they just look so soft. I really can't help myself and I've never felt this way.

But.

She sometimes has a short call with someone, I guess, her good friend Sam ? She's always smiling when she's talking with him and I get a sinking feeling in my stomach and it puts me into a bad mood for the rest of the day - or until she notices that I seem in bad mood. She's always trying to cheer me up.
All the signs point to that I have a crush on her, but that makes no sense because I'm not into girls.

I keep telling myself that, but I'm starting to believe it less and less. I know for sure that I like guys, that is kinda easy, but it's my feelings about girls are messing with my head. Well, one girl. I've been thinking about something for few days - experimenting.
Experimenting with girls.
I've actually been considering it, because it might help me or maybe it'll make it even more worse.

The main problem for me is that I don't really know who I could experiment with. It can't be just anyone, because I don't want to make out with strangers. My only close, trusted female friend who likes girls, because she mentioned someone before, is Grace, and I don't know if I can ask her to help me with this.