[✔️] 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐦 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬.

🏹] talking about love.

A/N: hey cuties <3 new chapter today! Is it angst? Is it fluff? Who knows? (Definitely not me lol) Before anything, thank you for all the support on previous chapters, it means the world! Anyways I'll most likely update weekly now, because I'll have to actually pick up education again :( anyways enjoy mwah (⁎⁍̴̆Ɛ⁍̴̆⁎)

Love is, to say the least, confusing. Though it's supposed to be pure, happy and truthful, the road to find it is foul, full of obstacles and lies - it's almost impossible to not get lost in the maze of excuses, facades and images that everyone puts up. The worst part about it is that people don't know why they hide behind lies, they only do it because others do too. Nanjo Kojiro may have seemed like an exception, though he really wasn't. He always pretended, acted and played around. He was just like everyone else - apart from, maybe, one person: Sakurayashi Kaoru. Kaoru is and will most likely always remain a mystery to anyone other than himself - though that would be assuming that he understands himself, something that no one could guarantee. However, this isn't the real puzzle here. The true mystery is how such polar opposites could possibly end up together all the time, both wanting the exact same thing but neither of them doing anything about it. So whenever they were with each other, they either found calm or anger in each other's presence. But they were never satisfied. They wanted more, more of everything. More of the intense feelings that they brought to each other, but most importantly more of each other in general. The only problem was that they couldn't understand each other.

For Kojiro, communicating was usually easy and enjoyable. Therefore, it didn't make the least bit of sense to him why whenever he was with Kaoru, he somehow managed to lose any communication skill he previously possessed. On Kaoru's side, talking maybe wasn't as easy, but he always had been a people pleaser. So he kept wondering why he gave in to every little bit of annoyance that Kojiro made him feel.

But here they were again, two high schoolers alone in a locked room, in complete silence, staring at each other. Even the silence seemed loud in this room, or maybe that was just the power that each had over the other. But then, the silence got too suffocating. Kojiro felt like he was drowning in the emptiness of the gap separating him from the boy in front of him. Though he was taken out of his agony when a voice sliced the lack of sound open, finally letting him breathe.
"Say, Kojiro. What do you think of love?" The voice came barely above a whisper from Kaoru's lips.
Saying that this question took Kojiro by surprise would be a huge understatement. He felt his breath hitchin his throat and his heart skip a beat. He tried to seem relaxed - and miserably failed - by clearing his throat before answering.
"That's a vast question," he laughed nervously. "I'm not really sure myself. What about you?" He asked.
"I think it sucks." Kaoru answered, as if it was the most obvious thing he ever said.
Now, that surprised Kojiro even more. It's not like he never thought about it, but he had at least a tiny bit of hope. Hope that, one day, the man whom he had been hopelessly in love with for basically his whole life would love him too. It was egoistic - he knew it - but he couldn't fight these feelings. Everything about them made Kojiro's rationality want to give in. So, at one point, he did. And of course, in that instant, he believed that it had been a mistake.

The only problem is that they both felt the exact same way about the other. A strange mix of fascination, interest, longing and warmth. But that was only one side of the coin, and their feelings were filled with confusion, insecurity, fear and tiredness. However, both students were way too stuck up to admit these feelings. So they filled up the gap that the other left in their hearts with empty arguments, meaningless insults and useless screams. To them, it was somehow better than nothing.
But on that day, in the locked room, it all crumbled.

Kojiro stood up abruptly, making Kaoru flinch at the sudden movement. Without a single word, Kojiro left the room, closing the door behind him. Kaoru was then alone with every little detail of the world surrounding him. The creaking of the cream coloured walls, the sound of seagulls coming from behind the door, the cotton-like clouds on the light blue sky outside the window, or the noises made by the soft wind caressing the green plants outside of the small room. It all was too much for him. He needed Kojiro. But the green haired student had already closed the door. It was too late.

On his side, Kojiro felt tears streaming down his cheeks. Of course it was going to end like that - he knew it! So why would he ever let hope settle in his heart regardless? It was foolish, immature and childish to hold false hope, it could only lead to heartbreak. But for some reason, he had believed. Maybe a little too hard. And, well, look where that had bought him. The boy couldn't hold back sobs as he ran. At no point did he even wonder where he was going, he just ran. Far away. As far away as his legs could take him. He wanted to leave, to never see anyone or do anything again. So he kept running, ignoring the stinging pain in his legs and feet. It was all so underwhelming compared to hearing Kaoru saying those words. 'I think it sucks.' These words started to become more and more real for Kojiro as his legs kept carrying him.

Over the years, love 'sucked' for the both of them. They hated the very mention of it, though they would never let it show.

Yet, a few years later, it changed. Because of a conversation that wouldn't have seemed so utterly out of place if it wasn't between them.
"Say, Kojiro."
"Hm?"
"What do you think of love?"
"I think it sucks."
"Well, I think it's not that bad after all." Kaoru said, before placing a small kiss on Kojiro's lips.
After a few seconds of surprise, Kojiro let a smile gain his lips. "You may be right." He said. "Maybe I misjudged it a little."