Theo

52

Tears ran down my cheeks wetting the pillow I laid on. Once again I found myself in pain not being able to move from my bed. Ryan had stayed with me throughout the night while Eli and Elias did the pack work for the time I had off. It was only again that I let anyone touch me and no snap at them for it. Cara's been in to see me with my nephew, he's grown so much and I've missed out on it due to me moping around.

It's been two weeks since I took Mika to mama. Whenever I feel ready to get her back, the next morning I can't get out of bed. Just like last night, I felt ready to see my daughter and raise her like Tate would want me to, but then I wake up in so much pain from losing my mate. I fucking hate myself for it, nothing seems to get better. No matter how many times Ryan reassures me, it still feels like nothing is good. My life is just one massive joke, as soon as things get good it turns to shit again.

When I was at school I'd have a week without being called names or hit, I thought everything would be alright only for it to start again. Then I have Tate, I didn't even have her for long before she was taken from me. Now I can't even get out of bed to raise Mika. It's fucked how life is isn't it. How all good things come but there's always a price to pay for happiness, it's never just happiness and you get that for free.

And here I am with my head on Ryan's lap as he comforted me the best he could. It wasn't my mate so nothing could help, but my family trying soothes me and Darius. Even when Darius and I feel good enough to even go out for a run, memories of Tate come back and I end up a sobbing mess. I know loss is inevitable and can't be stopped, but when you have that bond with someone, especially a mate bond you can't help but break. Even before Tate I felt broken, then I met her and she fixed it for me. Yet she was taken and now I'm not only broken but in a thousand pieces that can't be picked up and fixed like she once did.

Even after the talk with dad it still hurt. I know he said it takes time but I don't want time. What I need is to be able to raise my daughter but even I can't do that. Mama has done his best to help but he can't take care of her, he has Thomas and Xander as his kids now as they're still young and adding a baby into the mix isn't good on the ageing man.

"Wanna go for a walk? We don't have to shift, we can just walk. Get some fresh air for five minutes." Ryan asked me. I nodded wanting to try anything to be able to stay stable enough to take my pup into my arms again and raise her.

Ryan helped me shower and get dressed from being weak. Staying in bed for two weeks was ok, but it made me weak. Not that I'm complaining, I am weak. Hell I couldn't protect my mate and I'm an alpha, I'm supposed to be able to protect my pack, mate and pups. Yet I couldn't.

After I was dressed, Ryan let me lean on him as we walked out of the house. My face still red from crying with my body shaking. The warm sun shone down on me bringing a small smile to my face. Tate loved the sun, even pregnant she'd want to be out and about with the sun down on her no matter how she felt.

As we passed people, they gave small nods in submission, not once did anyone say anything about Tate. I knew it hit them hard as well seeing as the pack lost their Luna, but it would never make them feel how I felt with her. Ryan spoke to me about Mika and how much she's growing. I smile and let out small laughs at the stories of my little girl, all that I missed. I hate that I missed it, but I'm not letting her be in the same house as me if she cries like she did two weeks ago. The way she cried picking up the emotions was hard on both of us and until I know for sure I can look after her without showing my emotions too much, I won't take her back.

"She's grown so much." I whispered, my voice cracking a little as I spoke.

"She has. Mama said it won't be long until she starts talking. She makes a lot of noises anyway and smiles a lot. I don't know who smiles more, Mika or Tate." Ryan smiled sadly.

"She's just like her mum." I smiled sadly as well trying to hold back my tears.

"Hmm." He nodded. "Being with dad she likes him. Tommy she's a little sceptical of probably from the wolf side of her knowing he's a vampire. And Elias likes having another pup around, same with mama. I think if they could have more they would but old age is catching up to them." He chuckled.

"Yeah, feels the same with me. It feels like yesterday I was watching kids tv with Cara in that small apartment." I smiled at the memories of me and my little sister. She was obsessed with in the night garden where as I didn't like it but watched it just to see her smile.

After a while, I started getting tired from not sleeping well. Ryan helped me home where we sat on the sofa. I laid my head on his lap closing my eyes feeling sleep take over. It felt so long since I last slept, now it feels great to actually have that.

Ryan's POV

I carefully got up, placing Theo's head on the sofa so he could sleep longer. When I walked into the kitchen, Eli was there with some paperwork, which means Elias was in the office in the pack house doing other paperwork.

"Hey." I said casually as I looked in the fridge for something to eat.

"Hey." He sighed. Ever since he rejected me it's been awkward between us, only few words if not no words are shared between us.

Just be nice. "Do you want some lunch?" I asked. Might as well make him something if I'm eating as well.

"No, I'm good thanks." Eli replied. I rolled my eyes knowing he's hungry but won't take it from me.

"Stubborn prick." I mumbled to myself knowing he'd hear me anyway.

"What did you just call me?" He growled glaring at me. His eyes partly black letting me know his wolf was also present.

"Did I stutter?" I glared back at him. "I think the fuck not."

Eli got up and came up to me. His hand wrapped around my neck as he growled again. My back hit the counter trapping me between his body. Even with the height difference he still wants to show he's the big bad wolf. I smirked at his cuteness making him purr, well his wolf.

"Kinky much." I smirked.

A/N: Just a little sneak peak from what I'll be adding to the story of Ryan and Eli. Does anyone have any titles they have in mind for Ryan and Eli's story?
Also, who do you think will top and who will bottom between the two? Let me know.

Sorry for the wait my dad had some bad news and just needed family. Thank you so much for reading.