The love of a demigod | HeroSteve (On Ice for a while)

-42- Why me?

(Notchs' FoV)
My days are rough enough already.
I'm tired as all hell.
I don't want to interact or even see them currently.
And yet they're here, sitting in my room, looking at me more expectantly than a child whose mother is buying sweets for them.
I sighed a bit, but since I was annoyed enough, I just let them talk.
"Ah, great! Because we know what Entity did.", Steve said. I froze before glaring at him a little. "How the hell do you know?", I grumbled.
This was starting to get weird. First they track me down, secondly they make friends with my coworker, and third they know about my private life. Are they purposely trying to keep an eye on me so they'll find my weaknesses?
Hero was the one replying to my question. "Well, a bit ago I killed myself. Steve found the chest from my old times in the Aether and got the necklace out. He put it on just as I had a little encounter with this damned hacker."
I frowned. Now he's also attacking Hero? Really?
"Where's Alex tho? And Rico? And this other dude, I think Seto was his name?", I asked. Steve shrugged. "Rico should be doing his usual walk around the forest by now, Seto is dead and Alex is gone.", he explained. I frowned. "Seto is dead?"
"Crushed by a falling tree, yeah...", Hero mumbled.
I noticed that the atmosphere got darker and decided to change subject. "Well, anyway. What now?", I asked. "How can we fix this?", Steve asked worriedly.
I had no clue, so I shrugged. "I guess get Entity to leave him alone?", Jeb threw in. Hero frowned. "And how?"
"Maybe we can find his code and delete it?"
"Easier said than done, Jeb. You know how hard it is to delete someone and how long it takes.", I mumbled. He sighed. "Well, we should at least try...?" I didn't reply.
Truth to be told... We can't delete him. He's a parasite that stuck to my mind, not letting go so soon. If we delete him...
I'll die with him.
At this point, I don't care tho. My mind was already broken enough, I just wanted to finally rest again. I don't even know how long it's been since I last slept for real. My body was close to totally collapsing since it just had no energy left, and I felt absolutely sick and awful.
I sighed quietly as I kept hiding how extreme it was from both my coworker and my brother. Steve tho immediately looked through my disguise and frowned slightly. He seemed to understand what was up, but didn't say a word to his... Pregnant husband. Or boyfriend.
I don't care what they are. By now, I was mostly contemplating on disappearing out of their lives once and for all. It would be the best for them, and I doubt anyone would miss me at all.
"I guess it's worth a shot."
No, it wasn't. But those words escaped my mouth before I could stop them. Huh, I'm even to stupid to keep my damn tongue still. Of course you would be, Markus. You are pathetic after all.
Jeb didn't notice anthing that was going on in my head, so he smiled happily at us. "I'm sure we can fix that!"
No we can't. But who am I to say something like that.
The more I thought about that, the more I hated myself.
Why am I this pathetic? Why am I this weak?
But most importantly...
Why can I speak about something else, but when I want to say what's really up with me, my throat gets unbelievably dry and I can't move my lips, stuck in my mind like a fly in a spider web, just waiting for that spider to kill it?
I felt like I was gonna cry when I did that. The knot in my throat would steal my breath and I'd have to turn away and look out the window to calm down, so Jeb wouldn't notice and worry since I couldn't say a word.
God, I'm so pathetic I'm even annoying the one that can look into my head now, just because I'm so damn helpless.
Right now all three of them were staring at me.
Damnit, did I show that too much? Did I miss something they said, and now they expect me to say something?
Out of pure reaction I just asked the one thing that came to my mind, even tho it was unbelievably stupid.
"What did I miss?"
"More like, what are you hiding?", Hero asked quite sharply. I frowned and put up my usual mask. "I'm not hiding anything, Hero."
"Liar."
I looked at Steve, kinda surprised now. "Wait, what? I'm not a liar!"
No, I am. I'm a pathetic liar. Lying to my brother-in-law because of something I want to fix, but messing up anyway.
Jeb sighed. "Don't think I didn't notice what is up. You keep tearing up and looking away, you're tired as all fuck and everything is awful. Notch, just talk with us!"
I knew that they knew now. I wanted to speak. Cry my heart out. Tell what's wrong.
But as always, no sound left my throat.
I found myself staring at the ground silently, unable to say what was on my mind.
I need help. I feel weak. Helpless.
Terrified.
They kept watching, but eventually my body couldn't take it. I rolled my eyes to the sky and collapsed to the side, falling from the chair to te ground. Jeb let out a surprised yell and ran over with Steve. Hero just watched, slightly wide-eyed.
Then everything finally went black for me.

I soon woke up in a dark void. I frowned and sat up, groaning weakly and holding my head.
I just passed out, bringing them more problems.
Soon I noticed someone standing in front of me. It was a male, but 100% not Entity. This one was... Taller. Bigger.
"Oh, so you finally arrived. Took ya a while."
My heart stopped and my eyes widened. Then, a feeling went through me I haven't felt since a long time.
Relief.