Irreplaceable

chapter 1

***5 YEARS LATER***

JULIE'S POV

I wipe my tears away as I grab my black dress and put it on. I take a deep breath and look at the bed. One side untouched and unslept, the other messy and slept in. 

"Danielle, Dawson please get your shoes on, we are going to be late," I say putting my earrings on. "Mommy, why do I have to wear this black dress? I don't like the colour black" Dani says in her high-pitched voice, tugging at the bottom of her dress. 

"Well sweetie, when you go to a funeral, people wear black because it's a sad colour. And this is sad" I say kneeling to her level. "What's a funeral?" Dawson says walking over to us.

I take a deep breath in. This would have been a perfect moment to have Luke here with us. Dawson is like a clone of Luke. Looks the same and talks the same. A constant reminder of what I've lost.

"A funeral is somewhere we go when someone we love goes away," I say holding in my tears, straightening his little bowtie. I can't let my kids see me cry, I need to stay strong. 

"Will Daddy be there?" He asks as I take their little hands and bring them out to the car. They ask about him every time they get a chance. "I guess he will," My voice cracks. I take a deep breath in as I start driving. 

The funeral is small. Just our friend group and a few other people, although I just wish to be alone. I have so much on my plate that this isn't something I want or need. But the others need me, especially Reggie, this hit him really hard.

We pull up to Reggie and Flynn's new place. After Harvard, they moved back home. "Hey Jules," Flynn says somberly, hugging me tightly. 

"How's Reggie doing?" I say as Dani and Dawson run inside, probably looking for their father. 

"Not coping well. This hit him hard" Flynn says wiping one of her tears away. "How are you doing? With everything" She asks as we walk into the house. "Handling it, still in denial in a way" I smile weakly. 

"Julie" I hear Alex say from behind me. "Alex," I say wrapping my arms around his neck, his arms go around my waist. It's been a little while since we've seen each other. 

"How are you guys," I say letting go as I hug Willie. "Alright. I mean just things are weird now with Luke... ya know" Willie says, putting a hand on Alex's shoulder. 

Alex and Willie have been living their best lives running the new and improved Hollywood ghost club. For a while, after I had the twins, we would perform there. Then bigger venues came, then world tours. They also got married, nothing big. Just got a ghost minister to do it for them with the few of us. 

That's when Reggie approaches us. "Hey, guys," He says resting his head against Flynn's shoulder. "Hey, Reg. How are you doing?" I ask, grabbing his hand. "I'm alright, just years of friendship gone in the blink of an eye. Anyways it's you we should be worried about" Reggie says squeezing lightly. "Guys I'm alright ok," I say shrugging. 

"How is everything really holding up on your end Julie? How are the kids handling it all" Alex says weakly smiling at me. 

"They don't quite understand. They just think Daddy is away, for now, I've had to keep this lie for the past six months. They are getting older and it's not the easiest topic to bring up with five-year-olds" I say smiling through the pain.