Daughter of the Moon - Book Three: Fire

Chapter 11: A Broken Spirit

(Warning: this chapter discusses symptoms of PTSD, alludes to self-harming behavior, and includes physical contact between Sokka and Elara that may not be suitable for all readers. If you firmly believe anything discussed in this chapter is offensive or inaccurate to real life experiences, let me know and we can work together on fixing it (although, I have done extensive research in preparation for this section...we'll see if it worked)).

- Sokka -

I had assumed that once we had arrived at the Western Air Temple, everything would return to the way they were before Zuko had snatched Elara away from us all those months ago—our small family finally complete with the return of the incredible waterbender.

But that couldn't have been further from the truth.

Elara was quick to recover thanks to Katara and her healing abilities—her bruises fading away, her bones correcting themselves, and her cuts sealing closed as time passed (but not without leaving some horrid scars). And aside from a slight limp that would surely accompany her for years to come, Elara was in peak physical condition and was perfectly healed. We had gotten Elara back—but I suppose things were never that simple. The one thing Katara was unable to fix just happened to be the deadliest wound—her mind.

The night terrors. The visions. The fidgeting. The flightiness. The fear. It plagued her far more than any physical injury she had endured in that wretched prison cell, and I could tell that it was going to push her over the edge. She rarely left her room, and when she did, she would wander aimlessly about the temple as if she were trapped in a horrified trance. She hardly spoke aside from the short, one-worded responses we could occasionally get from her whenever we asked her questions, and on the rare occasion she would actually speak to us, it was always to apologize for being an inconvenience or a burden. She couldn't comprehend the idea that we wanted to help her because we cared about her, and that pained us to the core.

However, the most destructive side effect of Elara's poisoned mind was her inability to sleep. The only way we could get her to get any rest of any kind was if Katara used her bending to force her into it, but even then, we were cautious to do that just in case she didn't wake up the next morning. Our only other option was to stay with her as she tossed and turned in her bed, keeping a watchful eye on her so that she wouldn't harm herself as the shadows of the night consumed her. It was taxing on all of us, but we tried our best. Especially since this was Elara.

It was my turn once again to take the night shift with Elara as she rested, and I was rather concerned to see that she hadn't improved much since the last time I had watched over her. In fact, I was fairly confident that her condition had gotten worse, which was impressive considering how exhausted she should have been. She fidgeted in her small bed on the opposite side of the room, a string of incomprehensible phrases slipping past her lips as she was tormented by yet another nightmare, and I couldn't hold back the feeling that I should save her from whatever she was seeing. I knew it wouldn't work though. It never did.

Before I had to watch her suffer for another moment, Elara shot up with a start, her breathing ragged as she tried to push away whatever invisible demons were haunting her. I quickly jumped into action as she panicked, joining the girl at her side as I tried to comfort her.

"Hey, hey, Elara," I whispered as I reached out to hold her. "Settle down, you're alright. You're safe."

Elara pushed back a little as I joined her on the bed, but she quickly backed down once she recognized who it was. "Sokka..." she murmured as she dropped her head in shame. "I'm keeping you up again, aren't I. I'm so sorry." 

"Don't apologize. I wanted to stay up with you," I reminded her as I wiped away the last of her tears. "I want to help."

"No, you don't," she refuted.