a louis to go, please! » stylinson au

30: pinky promise

I know I pinky promised this to be funny tomlinsons-ukulele but I hope some fluff (if this can be called fluff oop) will do it as well? :)
I apologise for my terrible attempts to lift the mood in this chapter

Louis was far too good. Much too good for Harry. And yet he was selfish enough to want him all to himself.

The two were cuddled up in bed, Harry had his arms wrapped around Louis and has pulled him down all the way to his chest, so that their bodies were pressed together from head to toe.

It was all they wanted anyway, to be close to each other, feel the other because this is home.

Louis was still weak, was still scared and broken, his will to live was still nowhere to be found but he stayed. Fuck, he didn't even know why.

Was it Harry? Eleanor, Liam? His sisters? Niall? His mom? His future?

He didn't know, he was clueless. All he knew was that he was staying even though it hurt like hell. Literally. It was just pure torture for him, every breath was one too many and every time he moved he was more exhausted than before.

Just as Louis was about to fall asleep, Harry placed a quick kiss on his cheek, which was dangerously close to his lips.

He and Eleanor have somewhat broken up, they haven't kissed in forever, just hugs and that was it. Sure, kissing wasn't necessarily a big part of the relationship but it was easy to tell that their chapter was done.

It didn't hurt Louis though, it didn't affected him in a special way. He didn't curled into a ball and cried because it was over. For him it just an end of kisses. He still had Eleanor by his side as a great friend. That was what mattered anyway.

Harry buried his face into Louis' neck, holding him as close as ever. "Sorry" He said quietly, which made Harry perk up, "I probably smell bad."

Louis wanted to back away, because what if Harry got disgusted by him? What if he leaves? That was something he could not handle. Harry has been his anchor that saved him from the depths of the cold and dangerous ocean ever since they got closer. He didn't pulled him out, he was still in the water and he still got the cold and salty water into his face which was making it hard to calm down, but he wasn't drowning.

Sometimes it still felt like it, sometimes it felt like there was a rock (make it two) tied up to his feet and they were pulling him down, the weight being too much to handle.

He got pulled out of his thoughts when Harry picked him up from the bed and carried him to the bathroom. Louis creased his forehead in confusion, a line forming between his brows.

"What're you doing?" He asked quietly, gripping the edges of the toilet lid hard since Harry placed him down on it. He got a soft smile in return as the curly haired boy turned on the water.

"You're gonna take a bath then" He said and left a hand in the bathtub to check the temperature, careful for it to be not too hot and not too cold.

Louis gulped and looked down on the floor where Harry was kneeling. He looked healthy. His gaze wandered to his own body to which he flinched, not really wanting to look at what he's become.

He gripped the lid harder, noticing how it felt under his fingertips and nails, noted the way it curved and that it was shining in a dull white.

Harry eyed him up and down, his thin legs were pressed together as his eyes were fixated on the lid, as if he was spending all of his energy on it. Louis once told him that this helps his anxiety, focusing on an object and noticing every single detail about it, so he supposed that he was close to having an attack.

He kept his distance, made sure not to attract any distraction that could throw Louis off track and turned off the water.

Louis pressed his lips together, took deep breaths until they were steady again and looked up, directly into green eyes that were looking at the floor. Strangely, this calmed Louis down. The fact that the focus wasn't on him. He was forever grateful for Harry and all the little things he did to make him feel more comfortable and accepted.

"Thank you" He whispered and managed to give Harry a somewhat genuine smile, his eyes still didn't shined in a bright way, he had dark circles under his eyes and the hurt of staying alive was obvious.

And yet he was as beautiful as a human being could be. Still beautiful, still Louis.

Harry only nodded and turned around slowly. "You can change, I won't look" He said and paused for a split second, "Promise."

He nodded but kneeled down next to Harry, lifting his pinky finger. "Pinky promise?" Louis asked and grinned stupidly as well when Harry gave him a loopsided grin. He intertwined their pinkies and nodded, "Pinky promise."

Five minutes later Louis was sat in the bathtub, the lather covering parts that were personal and the water was pleasantly warm.

Harry was humming a song that Louis didn't know and grabbed the hair shampoo, giving Louis' scalp a light massage. Louis pulled his knees up to his chest and let himself be taken care of, let himself feel important and needed. He felt something.

And all of this something was felt towards Harry, the curly haired boy with the prettiest green eyes he's ever seen, the tall and awkward boy in his art and P.E. class who used to be another student in the crowd. It was felt towards Harry, the kind, loving, caring and giving person that he has learned to adore with all of his flaws and imperfections, because in some way we all have our edges and curves and fuck no one is perfect and no one ever will be.

There will always be mistakes that will be made, problems that you will run from, making hard decisions and then doing the wrong thing.

That's what life is about though, being wrong again and again to make it right one day. Most of the time the people don't even realize that.

They've been focused on the wrong things, they have been using all of their energy on trying to fix it that when the day came, it was unnoticed.

Perhaps that day Louis realized that staying was right. It was the hardest thing he has ever done, the most exhausting and tiring thing. But in the end it was worth it.

I'm sorry for the long wait :D
Anygays, I hope you enjoyed this one and have a nice day xx

[ WC: 1163 ]