By the next days I kept talking with Thomas, that angel fallen from heaven, he was such a good guy and I was deeply in love with him. The more days passed the more in love I was with him. Loving him was very difficult because I hadn't acepted me yet. It wasn't the best time to me to be in love with someone. The first thing I had to do was to accept myself because, how I said before, one of the worst feelings is not liking yourself, being disgusted of who you are. That was what I felt about me disgusting.
However I started a very strong friendship with Thomas and I continued getting along with Rob. At this point of the story everything was so good, I had another friend, I was also very good friend of Rob and I was becoming more self confidence but then I have the worst idea I have had.
One day I woke up decided to tell Rob, who still was my best friend, my secret. It was a huge step for me to accept me, tell someone who I apreciated my most important secret to have someone who I could talk if I had a problem. I have always been a little bit craven so I decided to do it by WhatsApp. I remember that day as if it happened yesterday. It was saturday midnight, we weren't going to school until Wednesday so I thought that it was the perfect day to tell him my secret. I was terrified.
-What if he don't acept me?- I thought-What would I do if he is homophobic.
I was filled with existential fear. And then I reunited the strenght enough to tell him I wasn't straight. I wasn't sure he would acept me so I told him I was Bi. I thought that way would be easier for him to acept me than telling him I was gay. So I told it to him. I won't forget that day 19th of september of 2020. When I told him I was Bi he wasn't homophobic but he also was not supportive. The first thing he asked me was what p0rn I used to watch, I thought he was a little bit heartless. Who would ask his friend wich is going trough bad times which p0rn he sees. It's hearless. I knew he was a little bit heartless sometimes so it didn't annoy me too much
When we came back to school at Wednesday he didn't look me at the eyes. That were so hard for me, he was my best friend and he couldn't look me at the eyes. If he couldn't how the rest of the world could. I started to feel unsure and to have self-esteem issues since then.
The next days he was a little bit weird with me. Over the time he acepted, but I'll never forget the way he looked me. I found emotional refuge with Thomas, he was always with me being such as good person as he was.
YOU ARE READING
A Teen's Diary
RomanceThis story It's about a young boy, Mike who starts discovering himself and has to deal with people who are againist him and his way to are. I hope this story may help someone if they are dealing with the same things like Mike. I hope you enjoy it
