Bravery Requires Fear

4. Aftermath

A/N: See end of chapter for notes on possible triggers.

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She wailed.

Elaine cried for what seemed like hours afterwards and Barry knew better than to offer her condolences, so he stuck to wrapping her wounds while she sobbed.

Barry wondered why Elaine didn't try to shove him off. She always shoved him off.

Barry had gone to the lounge to bring back two cups of the tea, he'd left Elaine in the other room, when he turned to bring the cups back they almost dropped from his hands.

There she was, in all her magnificent, fiery glory, holding him still with an icy glare.

Her cheeks were stained with tear streaks, her face was red and puffy and bleeding still but her eyes still help that fierceness within them, her eyes were still keeping the stars captive within them, but most importantly she looked ready to stare death in the face and spit on his shoes.

"Don't touch me, don't ever lay a single fucking finger on me again or you'll find yourself without a dick."

He dropped his tea, she caught both cups, drained the first one to it's dregs and chucked it at the nearest wall.

As the porcelain cup broke into pieces something shattered in Barry's heart, it was a part of him that had been missing for years, and it was gone as quick as it had came, maybe not entirely gone, but it broke in that moment, it broke too much to glue back together.

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What had been more miserable than anything though, was fighting with someone who she had come to see as an equal stare at her with such disgust and anger, look at her like she had killed his father and completely destroyed his life, before launching into an attack so similar to the way Noah used to fight.

Launching an attack at her.

And it felt like living hell because she had to constantly tell herself that this was Barry Allen, some guy from another Earth who was beaten to shit, and not her dead brother. She had to consistently remind herself that she couldn't just reach over and sling an arm around his shoulder, that she couldn't just throw her arms around him and give him a hug like she used to, that this wasn't him and she couldn't treat him like he was just because he fought the same way and had the same smile.

Her elbows hurt, her knees hurt, her arms hurt, her entire fucking body hurt because of him and his stupid—stupid?— stupid stupid stupid self.

How many hours she spent sitting on her bedroom floor afterwards, she didn't know. But she knew she didn't get any sleep because when the sun rose she wanted to throw a blanket over her head and sleep more.

She did just that.

And she stayed in bed and slept the day away, only getting up to use the toilet and eat the froyo Bryce brought her. When her boss called her in for work, she ignored him, when Chris called her six times in a row she ignored her, when Barry knocked on her bedroom door however, oh no she didn't ignore that, she let him in.
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It had been three weeks and they were still trying to get him home. Initially they'd said he couldn't go back, and he'd accepted that, but after the shock and anger he pushed his way through to logic. They could find a way, they would find a way.

Barry and Bryce worked together day in and day out looking for a solution, or well, as much of the day that they could between helping Elaine with bad guys and keeping an eye on Mattias. Christina had gone off to some wilderness retreat with her psychologist team for a project and after much consideration, had decided to leave Mattias in the town with Elaine, Greyson and Bryce, Barry as an added benefit. He crashed with the boys most days, and stayed with Elaine during the weekends if she was at home.