Symptoms Of Love

CHAPER 34- LOVE

"woman can't change a man because she loves him. A man changes himself because he loves her." Steve Harvey.

“Reeve let go of me!” Amnesty struggles to break loose. But my grip on her wrist  became tighter. I don't care what she thinks of me, I am not letting her drink in front of a stranger. And Shane, he is so dead.

We reach my car and I still won't let her go. She will probably run, climb on cars or something.

“Reeve you are hurting me.” her voice cracked, she was gonna cry. I let go of her, and to my surprise she just stood there.

Taking a minute she finally speaks, “who the hell do you think you are.” she spits with utter bitterness.

She hates me.

“What do you think you are doing? You said you have something to take care of and yet here you are sitting at a bar. You said you don't drink and yet here you are drinking with a stranger. From tomorrow basketball practices are starting or are you planning on ditching that too. So much for making your dad proud huh.” I know what I said was out of line, but I just said it anyway. I didn't want to hurt her like this, but somehow I always end up doing so.

She stared at me with disbelief. The drinks she chucked in a while ago finally starts kicking in and she loses her balance. My hands subconsciously wrap around her, preventing her from collapsing. It was when my body touched hers I realised that her skin was burning hot. 

“Don't you dare touch me.” she shouts. It was hard to tell that this is the same girl who can kick hard enough to send one to the stars. Who is now unable to push me even when applying all her strength.

“Don't touch me.” she screams again. I let go of her. She looks frail, something I wasn't aware she was capable of looking. Amnesty even when crying out of anger, sick, tired has never looked frail. 

Her eyes were back to my face, like she trying to figure out something. Face red eyes moist, she wants to cry but she is holding it in. This is because of me, just minutes before she was happily laughing and now she is in this state because of me. When I said that I wanted to hurt her, I was wrong. Seeing  her so vulnerable is tearing me apart. I want to hug her so tight. Tuck her hair, kiss her forehead, tell her i am sorry, tell her i would never hurt her again. Tell her that I am in love with her.

This might only be hitting me now. I feel like someone is holding my heart and squeezing it tight. All that I have aimed for until now seems like a joke. I aim to be the most powerful man and yet here I am dying seeing a girl I love hurt. Hurt because of me. Literature which used to give the the most exaggerated explanation of love, telling its kind yet cruel, warm yet cold, merciful yet ruthless, it all makes sense now. 

Her eyes were telling me that she was disgusted of me, that she would rather be anywhere but in my embrace right now.

I take off my jacket and wrap it around her. It doesn't take her a second to throw it on the ground. 

“ Just let me go.” she says in a soft painful voice and something told me she means this is where we part our ways for good. 

Understood Chi.

“ Let me take you home and I promise I will never talk to you ever again.” my heart screamed no, but i spoke anyways.  

Without saying a word she gets inside the car. If it wasn't for my two seater, she would have sat behind.

The ride was quiet, she was leaning on the window looking outside. For her she must be wanting to get out as soon as possible, I wished the ride would be as long as possible. This seemed like the closest she would ever be near me henceforth. 

We reach our rooms. She takes out her key, I wait for her to go in first. She looks at me, which i am guessing would be for the last time and goes inside. 

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I had thought long before framing this particular chapter. Before this chapter both Amnesty and Reeve had a very powerful image, but in this chapter both are showing their vulnerable sides. Especially for Reeve, from the start he has had a bad boy image. Many would imagine him not to be this vulnerable to his emotions, not accepting his feelings so soon, but reeve is a human after all and above all a human in love. You are hurt seeing the person you care about hurt and especially if it's because of you. The most important point I am trying to convey here is that, You dont realise you are in  love when you see her in the most beautiful dress or when you are jealous because she is doted by many wooers. It's when your emotions aren't in your control anymore, it all depends on her emotions. It's when you feel them magnified. With time she becomes the most beautiful thing irrelevant of what she wears and jealousy fades away because you trust your bond more than anything. Love is a beautiful thread that connects a person, it can break, entangle or become more stronger.