gus was back in his little cycle of having a new girl over every night, i listened to her leave every morning. which stayed true today, footsteps running down the stairs just as the sun had risen.
i didn't work today, which was nice. i made coffee for cody and i, who both happened to be up right now. "how's the album going?" i asked, knowing him and gus had had something in the works for a while. "it's done. ready to drop anytime now just waiting for gus" cody told me. "oh, i had no idea. i haven't heard much about it since he showed me the one song" i told him. "just ask, i'm sure he'll be happy for you to listen. he's super proud of it" cody told me.
"ah, the man himself" cody said, gus coming to join us at the table. "are guys gossiping about me?" gus asked "just telling her about the album, she hasn't heard it yet" cody said. "oh do you want to?" gus asked. "yeah, kinda" i said, a little intrigued with what he had created. "well then let's go" he said, basically dragging me down the stairs.
he ran over to the laptop on the table, "ready? ready?" he asked, obviously proud of himself. "let's hear it" i said. he started with the first song i'd already heard. gus hummed along to each song, singing some parts a little louder than others.
we got to a song he said was called 'nose ring'. "baby girl who the fuck is your man now?" he sang, looking at me a little too specifically. he came over to where i was standing, stopping right in front of me and leaning over me a little. i looked up at him, knowing what we both wanted right now.
gus pushed his lips onto mine, pushing me back against the wall. i kissed him back harder, i found myself liking him more and more each day. "i really like you aspen" he said. i kissed him instead of answering, i didn't feel like having that chat right now.
gus hands moved down my spine, stopping at my hips. "hey man, you shown her ye—" cody stopped in his tracks as he turned the corner from the stairs. i pushed gus off of me as fast as i could "oh, oh i didn't realize this was a thing" cody said, pointing to us. "it's not" i said, stepping away from gus. "mhm" gus said, giving me a disbelieving look.
"yeah, albums good. both of you did great work, super talented" i said, starting my escape back to upstairs. now i had cody and gus to avoid for the day.
-
it was saturday, so as evening rolled around so did the bunch of random people that thought it was okay to just come to our house. i stayed upstairs, not wanting to have the 'so you and gus?' conversation with anyone right now.
music blared from downstairs and people yelled over it. usually i was okay with socializing and having a little fun, just not tonight. i heard the obvious sounds of gus bringing yet another girl to his room. i was pretty numb to it at this point.
cody
u not coming down?
if it's cos of the whole gus thing earlier i promise idgaf
u guys can do whatever
not my business
aspen
no just not feeling it tonight
not about that
but we aren't a thing
it was just a random heat of the moment thing
cody
sure
-
night rolled around again, the noise had died down and the house was calm and empty once again. the front door closed for the last time, meaning it was just the 5 of us in the house again.
i'd been struggling to sleep, i had a lot on my mind. most of it about gus, he was living in my head and i couldn't get him out no matter how hard i tried. i couldn't have him, i didn't want him. i shouldn't want him, i mean look at how he treats girls.
i jumped as my doorknob turned, the bolt clicking open. gus just let himself into my room this time, sitting on the edge of the bed. "what do you want?" i asked. "i just get lonely at night, you make me feel less alone" gus said.
i kind of just accepted it, letting him under the blankets into the bed. i didn't like sleeping alone either but i wasn't going to tell him that. "do you get lonely after dark every night or only since i moved in?" i asked, sensing a pattern.
"i always have, but now i have someone to help" he said, wrapping an arm around me. i don't know why i was doing this to myself, letting him come use me when he needed me so he could turn around and fuck someone new tomorrow.
i finally had to admit it to myself, i liked gus. i did, a lot. i wanted to be with him, i wanted him to want me and only me but that's just unattainable. i knew i needed to stop this before i got myself more hurt. i stopped being grossed out by hearing girls footsteps up the stairs, instead i was jealous. wishing it was me who was getting his attention.
at least i had him now, fully embracing the affection i was getting. he stroked my hair while i laid on his chest, yet another night. "can i stay?" he asked, seeming to equally enjoy my presence "please do" i said, not wanting him to go. "we're you avoiding me tonight?" he asked.
"sort of" i said honestly. "why baby?" he asked. "didn't wanna be asked questions by everyone, assuming cody had talked" i said. "he didn't" gus said. "but don't pull that shit, i always wanna see you. maybe i'd want other girls less if i had you around more" he said. "maybe, i don't know" i blew his comment off, not wanting to think about him and other girls.
gus and i fell asleep together, in the same bed again. i'd stopped counting how many nights in a row it had been.
a/n
prolly last chapter 4 the day
i'll let u know what's happening w weekend updates cos of my surgery but hoping to just lay on the couch and write for a few days straight lol
