The Winter Soldier's Girl

The Deception

The sun had risen on my face , and God did i wish I had bought the premium black out curtains , I was in a mood.
A bad mood.

Once the light had shown in through the windows I hated myself ,I hated the earth and I hated the sun, I threw the duvet over my face to shield me from the reality of what happened last night I wanted darkness , just total darkness.
When I closed my eyes all I seen was the look on his face once he realised it was me.

The scene played over and over again on repeat
Bucky was there as close as my face was to this pillow , and our eyes met again. What kind of trained fighter trips on a pair of heels?
Anyways he had caught me before I slammed my face on the floor, our eyes locked in each other and it was a good 30 seconds where we were in a trance never daring to gaze away until he ruined it by opening his mouth to speak.

Once I saw it open I was knocked out my day dream and suddenly realised the situation I was in and knew I needed to get the hell out of there, and fast, but now he knew I was here, and what did I do to get myself out of that?

I ran.

I ran like the coward I was and when I went to look back he didn't follow me, I must have hurt him real bad for him not to look for me, he and Steve always had this thing where they would say to the end of the line for each other , we had one similar "I'm always gonna be right behind you",

God i wished he had followed me but at the same time I'm glad he also didn't.

I WANT THE EARTH TO SWALLOW ME WHOLE.

I made a right mess of myself and the only way to get through it was a pint of Berry and Jens ice cream , Bridget Jones and a whole bottle of Tequila ,the strong kind too , the only thing is I had neither of the latter in my home therefore it required actual movement out of my luxury villa and take a whole 20 footsteps to the local market and like I said before I was in a mood. And my bed was my happy place.

17:00
I stink , literally. I muster all my strength to get out of bed, (I wasn't even sleeping I was staring out the window looking at the world roll on by).

I place myself in the shower for a 20 minute sing along to my depressing playlist on Spotify , "Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about meeeee" it's a good song ok!

I let the rose scented shower gel cleanse me of my embarrassment and almost in badness allow my shampoo to sting my eyes I deserved it for being in my bed all day I needed to feel something after being numb and embarrassed all day.

Once I got out of the shower I felt more energised I had let the negative energy out and tried to stay more positive and happy and I realised what better way to stay happy than a pint of ice cream. Remembering again that my kitchen is bare and mostly consists of ramen noodles and microwave ready meals I get dressed quickly, dried my hair and applied a bit of mascara just to boost my esteem and ran out of the house before I changed my mind .

Again.

The market beside where I live usually has everything I've ever needed ,but no today Karma decided to be a real bitch and made me drive 5 miles on my motorcycle to the other market.

"Well if it isn't my favourite customer"
I turn around and Al the shopkeeper is looking at me with the biggest smile on his face

"it's been a while Lani, let me guess that brother of mine doesn't have that ice creams of yours does he"

I smile back

"You know Al ,something tells me you have something to do with that"

"it's not my fault Jorge fell in bad with the ice cream supplier"

I rolled my eyes back to Al,
"A little bird told me you blackmailed them" the shock on his face was hilarious he had no idea I knew and it left him speechless, Him and his brother owned that shop together then fell out over paint colours, causing Al to leave and start himself a new shop leading them both to have a competition between each other on who gets better sales.

"Just the ice cream Al , thanks " I give him the money on the counter and I hear the bell on the door ring , someone was behind me,

"Bye Lani I'll see you later"

I wave back and turn around to find a 6 foot figure stand in front of me, his cologne ever so similar I look up and all I hear is....

"So it's Lani now is it?"

Shit