I'm sorry it's been so long since I've written to you. I think about you every day. I still cry over losing you more than I care to admit. I feel all alone in my pain. I look back on what my life used to look like, surrounded by so many people that I loved. Now, Grandpa's gone too and it feels like the entire family has fallen apart. I really don't think I can handle another loss. My heart already has two massive holes in it. That pain in my chest that came when that police officer told me you were deceased never went away, it just keeps getting more and more intense. I try to act strong, to hide that pain, and it seems to work for the most part. That's probably because I've become a much more private person, I just don't tell anyone what I'm feeling anymore. Nobody wants to listen to a sad girl talk about dead people all the time. But, fuck dude, 21 years just wasn't enough. We still had so many plans and memories to make. I'll forever regret not forcing you to take pictures with me when I had the chance. I just genuinely never thought I'd lose you. I never thought I'd become an only child. It's been over 5 years since you passed and I'm still sitting here crying so hard that I feel like I'm gonna puke. I really hope you know how much I love you. You may have died, but my love for you never will. You were my best friend, Justin.
YOU ARE READING
Letters to You
RandomAfter losing my only brother on January 31, 2016, I've decided to write letters to him as if to update him on my life. This is mostly a way for me to let out all of the feelings that I keep inside.
