A New Life

twenty six.

"Good night sweetie."

Danielle's POV

I wake up before my alarm Tuesday morning by the sun shining into the hotel room. Remembering the events of last night, I immediately sit up, looking for Abby when I realize she's no longer laying beside me.

"Morning," I say when I spot her sitting at the rectangular table across the room.

"Hi," she looks up shyly before diverting her gaze back down to her phone.

"When did you get up?" I ask, stretching before climbing out of the bed. She just shrugs her shoulders, not saying anything. Weird, I think to myself. I grab a sweatshirt from my suitcase and throw it over my body before walking over to where Abby is sitting. I pull the chair that's directly in front of her out and sit in it, looking at her expectantly.

"Do you want to go down and get some breakfast before we have to go to hair and makeup?" She glances up at me very briefly before standing up and walking back over to the bed we slept in.

"I'm not hungry." What is going on with her?

"Abby..." I get up from the chair and make my way over to the bed where she is sitting. She looks down at the ground as soon as I'm near her and starts picking at her fingers. I reach my hand out and tilt her head back up to look at me. She stands up to try to move away from me again, but this time I take hold of her hand before she can escape.

"What's going on?" I ask quietly, my voice filled with concern as I try to read her face. She just looks down at me as tears fill her eyes. "Abby..." I stand up, grabbing on to her other hand now, too. "Please talk to me," I beg.

"I'm embarrassed," she spits out.

"Why?" I asked, confusion lacing my voice.

"Because of last night," a tear escapes her eye and she looks anywhere but at me. "Who has a panic attack because of a door lock?" She releases her hands from my grip and brings both hands up to cover her face.

"Hey," I stand up from the bed and start to reach to bring her hands down, but decide against it and just bring her in close to my chest. I know she's embarrassed, I don't want to act like I'm exposing her anymore so I decide to cover her up more instead.

"We're in a hotel, obviously nobody can get in here." she says. "And I had a panic attack about it? That's so lame." her voice sounds weak and and I release her from my arms. This time, I do decide to take hold of her hands and bring them away from her face.

"Abby, I want you to listen to me, okay?" I hold her head close to mine with my hands and she nods slowly with a shy look on her face. "You're traumatized. You've experienced things that no one should have to even think about experiencing, and your mind is affected because of that. Your need to make sure the door is locked is real, and it's perfectly reasonable. And I hate to say this, but it's probably kept you safe a few times without you even realizing it."

She nods her head weakly, not saying anything. "And that panic attack? It may have been triggered by the fact that you didn't check the door, but you have anxiety which causes your mind to not be able to control itself. You said it yourself, one anxious thought led to another and another, you can't control that. Something that may seem lame in the grand scheme of things might be the biggest deal in your world, and that's okay. You have different experiences than other people, and you have different ways of coping with everything."

She still doesn't say anything, and instead just leans forward and puts her forehead on my chest. I place one of my hands on the back of her head. "You're strong, okay? The strongest girl I know, and the people who don't know you that well may not see that, but I do. Okay?" She nods her head against my chest. After a few moments of her laying against me in silence, she lifts her head up and looks me in the eyes.

"I just feel so vulnerable now," she admits. "After everything I said."

"Abby, you telling me everything you did last night..." I shake my head as I'm at a loss for words. "I'm so proud of you." I feel myself getting choked up a little. "Please, I don't want you to regret telling me any of that. I can't even explain to you how happy it makes me that you can trust me like that," a tear rolls down my cheek. "Please don't feel vulnerable, because you're safe with me, okay? I want to be your safe space."

"You are," she says quietly while wiping the tears away from her face. "Thank you." I pull her in for one more hug.

"Okay, do you feel alright?" I ask when she pulls away, and she just nods her head. "Okay, what do you want to do now? Do you want to go down to grab some breakfast, or we can stay up here and I can have Stefania bring us up something?" I watch the wheels turn inside her head. "Or I could head down and let you have a little alone time up here for a while?"

"No, please stay." She says quickly.

"Okay," I assure her.

"I just need a minute...I'm gonna go wash my face and then we can head down?" she asks.

"Yeah, that's perfect."

...

After Abby comes back from the bathroom, we decide to go downstairs for breakfast. It's still pretty early, so hopefully there won't be too many people. Stefania texted me to say that she was going to head down soon too, so we'll probably see her.

"Here, it's a little cold, you might want this." I hand her the sweatshirt that was hung up on the back of the chair.

"Thanks," she says as she pulls the material over her head.

"Ready?" I ask, grabbing my phone and room key. She nods her head and does the same.

As soon as we walk out of our room, Stefania comes out of hers at the same time.

"Hey, you." she says when she sees us, and Abby smiles at her.

"Hi," I smile up at her shyly. She looks up and down the hallway before walking over to me and attempts to kiss me, but I put my hand up to her mouth. "I haven't brushed my teeth yet." I giggle.

"I don't care!" she protests. "Let me kiss you," she pouts like a toddler.

"Fine," I say, and she smiles as she leans in to place a soft kiss to my lips. How could I resist a kiss from her?

"How are you, Abby?" Stefania asks after she pulls away from me.

"I'm...good." she says. "How are you?"

"I'm good as well," she smiles. "Shall we walk down together?" I hold my breath as I feel Stefania's hand delicately placed on my lower back.