🔞5EX: SUSTAINED OBLITERATION🔞

A hungry cat

Two more weeks pass and I barely see anyone but Jimmi who I see daily, spending most of my time alone, planning how to tell their story as a whole, but also giving them all equal copy and their own independent voices. I want the world to see them as 5 young men with many different interests, habits and pasts?!
I'm taking this role as official biographer very seriously. I've already been out into town and talked to the public, getting quotes and opinions of the boys. Some people were not very complimentary, mainly middle aged men funnily enough, but most were fans. Not one person I spoke to didn't know who they were. From young children, up through the ages to some very elderly people, EVERYONE I spoke to knew of them. They are without a doubt, the most famous group in the world!
I've had one to one 'on the record' conversations with Teddi, Parker and Noah, just chatting generally, getting to know them. I'm evaluating their opinions on world events, environmental issues, crime, racism and also gender equality, discrimination and the biggie...... love!
I'm surprised by how informed they are, how passionate and opinionated too, but also at how differently they view things. For example, when discussing discrimination with Teddi he tells me he experienced very little prejudice as a young gay man, telling me he knew from a young age he was not like most of the boys in his class, preferring the arts over sports, attending a show over a football match, and only ever getting aroused by male bodies, having no interest whatsoever in groping boobs or kissing girls, but drawing a naked man in art class or helping the football team wash their backs after a game, he was there like a wasp on jam!
He told his parents who assured him they already knew and loved him just the same. His only experience of prejudice was being continuously advised to 'be straight' to boost his appeal with young girls who make up most of any groups fan base. He worried about his opportunity to perform passing him by because of his refusal to do so, unwilling to turn his back on himself that way, knowing absolutely who he was and what he wanted to stand for, trusting his talent would get him to his career destination.
By contrast, Parker grew up in a very homophobic home environment, his father often beating him, telling him it's to 'knock the fairy out of you', his mother refusing to acknowledge his sexuality in any way, insisting on arranging for him to date her friends daughters in the misguided hope of a marriage and grandchildren. What she described to him as 'a normal, proper life'. He twice had roles he had been cast for taken from him after the casting directors discovered he was gay, although obviously it was never cited as the reason in the press, clashes with scheduling was blamed in both cases. His only positive experience was when he auditioned for his place in 5EX, the management unconcerned by his sexual preferences, instead focussing on and trusting in his talent.
Very different early experiences and continuing difficulties has lead both men to be outspoken and supportive members of the LGBTQ+ community, striving for equality for all. Their hope, to connect with those people who are still hiding their true selves due to fear. Fear of rejection, fear of violence and fear of failure, based purely on their sexuality, something beyond control. They hope to show all those people chasing a dream that talent and determination to succeed are the only requirements to pursue your dreams, citing their own situations as inspiration. They are both very empathetic and intelligent men, clearly very passionate about subjects that matter to them, and hugely interesting. I'm going to enjoy speaking with them both further.

I'm getting some sun in the garden and typing furiously on my laptop, desperately trying to get my current thoughts recorded before I forget something, when Yanni sits opposite me and invites me to his studio for our first 'on the record' conversation. Im taken aback by this approach as I was expecting id have to chase him for some of his time, so I hastily accept, collect up my things and follow behind him, hopeful that well directed questions will alleviate any awkward silences or hostile words.
Ive only exchanged words with him 3 times in the last fortnight so I'm unsure if it is as a result of our fledgling truce or due to lack of contact between us, but we have had no unpleasantness since that night. Our meetings have been brief, but casually polite, comments on our workloads or that old favourite, the weather, occupying the entirety of any conversation between us. Eloise was with him on one occasion where we all arrived in the kitchen together and she actually smiled and said Good morning to me. I'm not sure if I returned the greeting such was my surprise, my brain struggling to process this unfamiliar situation.
Its been reasonably comfortable, but we have barely seen each other.
Maybe there will still be some tension? I really hope not! I've been tense around him since I first met him almost a month ago now. I need to relax, my muscles are tense 100% of the time, my body aches continuously as a result. He makes me anxious and nervous, he is unpredictable and seems to cycle through emotions rapidly, cuddling up romantically with Eloise when they are together, but when he and I are alone and he thinks I can't see him he watches me, like a hungry cat looks at a tiny mouse, unnerving and exciting me in equal measure.