Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves.
Lauren and Leyla are chatting happily with Max, while Mina plays on the floor with Luna.
Everything seems to be going perfectly.
The music plays in the background and I feel my nerves slowly leaving me. Standing at my sink, I scrub the plates of pizza sauce and ice cream bowls.
I know I'm being a terrible host right now.
But I can't sit by and have them idly sitting in the sink. The sauce and dessert slowly staining my plates and bowls.
My OCD for cleaning is a problem- I know this, but this is removing my nerves from earlier.
With each scrub of my rag against the smooth porcelain China- my upset disappears with the residue.
"Hey."
"Jesus..." I nearly drop a plate as Max touches my shoulders suddenly. "Are you trying to make me have a stroke?!"
I look up at him and he removes his hand.
"No, I didn't know you were so lost in thought."
"You could make some noise before coming up behind a person." I state a bit angered out of embarrassment.
"Sorry..."
Awkward silence.
"Huh...it's fine. Did you need something?" I ask as I finish the plate in my hands and set it in a stack for the dishwasher.
"I...um...I just wanted to see if you needed any help." Rubbing the back of his head, he seems like he too has nerves floating about him.
"Oh, I'm almost done."
"You're missing one heck of a conversation over there."
"I'm sure it's just riveting." Calm down you twat. AND BE NICE!
"Ha, yeah. You know, you don't have to do those right now. You could enjoy your party." He says with just a slight tone.
"I am."
"You're over here doing dishes instead spending time with your friends you invited." I set the plate down and it clatters some of the silverware in the sink as I turn quickly and look up at him.
The whole apartment goes silent.
Their eyes all land on him and I as my heart pounds horribly in my chest.
His face pales slightly, but he doesn't look nervous or upset- just there.
Existing.
Expressionless.
Tearing my gloves away, I toss them in the sink and I head off to my bathroom- slamming the door behind me.
Leaning against the door, I take a few deep breaths and try to find my center, but tears slowly spring up into my eyes for God knows what reason.
Why am I so upset?
Honestly?
There's no reason to be.
He wasn't wrong.
I should've left the fucking dishes.
Is it that important to get them clean this very instant?
No!
And he offered to help- which he didn't have too.
And you flipped.
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