dandelions || 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘩𝘰 (COMPLETED)

xi - realisation

REALISATION
-
"that you'll be mine"

• • •

THE BOYS HAD collectively come to the conclusion that lyn was best suited as a med-jack for the time being, the horror of ben's attack ever present in her mind. she decided that it wasn't just the fact she'd nearly been killed, since she would likely be capable of dealing with that alone; it was the fact that ben had been banished and was never coming back.

ever.

and she blamed herself, despite countless monotoned voices telling her it was anyone's fault but her own.

alby hadn't completely disclosed the reason ben had picked her to ambush. all he really revealed was that she played a significant part in something ben had remembered — something awful enough to be deserving of attempted murder. newt didn't succeed in concealing the amount of knowledge he had of what ben had remembered, but he did succeed in keeping that knowledge out of her reach. and she eventually gave up trying to prise it out of them, realising they'd tell her when they were ready and when there was no use in keeping it secret anymore. when they escaped, though the day never seemed to get any closer. in fact, it only seemed to drift further from their clutch the longer they were kept in the glade like animals.

• • •

it'd only been a day since ben's banishment when lyn finally gathered enough energy and motivation to haul herself out of bed and out into the morning dew of the glade, greeted by the familiarity of the sun bouncing off her skin and illuminating it warmly. after two sleepless nights and a whole day spent hunched in a ball on minho's bed, she thought an early start was just what she needed to revitalise herself.

minho hadn't returned to running in the time between then and ben's death, and he happened to be ending his short break the same day lyn was beginning her duties as a med-jack.

seeing the tall boy waiting by the doors, his skin glowing and hair flawless, she realised how early it really was. she was about to turn around when a hand gripped her wrist gently. "lyn..." the all-too-recognisable voice began, "are you doing alright? i feel like we haven't spoken in ages."

it had been a whole day lyn had gone without any contact with anyone, bar chuck slipping meals under her door. chuck was hard to resist talking to, she'd realised, and eventually gave up trying to ignore him. she'd crafted a makeshift 'do not disturb' sign to pin on the wooden door in an effort to deter any unwanted visitors, but minho had still tried his luck knocking and only cleared off when lyn had told him she'd sneak out with him the following night if he did so. in all honesty she was looking forward to it, not even caring about the consequences like she'd usually expect herself to.

"still up for later?" yes. she was. but she couldn't say that.

instead, she rolled her eyes. "so excited," she said, sarcasm oozing out of her tone.

he winked at her flirtatiously, before running up to alby (they were running the maze together in an attempt to find the spot ben had been stung and investigate) and through the open stone gap into the maze.

they were just friends. it was a mutual decision, she kept telling herself, and it was for the best. they flirted a lot (though a little one-sided on minho's part) but it didn't mean anything. nothing did in the glade, really. nothing mattered: only survival. there was no time for messing about with teen romance — it was unfair but true. she couldn't live out a normal adolescence; she was trapped in the middle of a huge maze with killer monsters, and it wasn't exactly the ideal setting for a typical rom-com, nor a teenage girl's life. it wasn't as if they asked to be there, was it? no, surely not, though there was no way of telling as none of them could remember anything from their previous life.

and that was the reality she had to deal with.

by the time she'd finished her routine deep morning thoughts, most of the boys were already up and about, the glade bustling once again, and she walked over to the med-hut to start her new job. she'd never even lay a finger on any of the supplies in the little shack, let alone tried to heal anyone, but she wasn't complaining about her placement in the glade's hierarchy. she admitted to herself it was a little sexist since she would've had unbelievably harsher treatment if she wasn't a girl, but the inequality meant she received the protection she wanted and she didn't want to argue with the boys — yet.

clint and jeff greeted her as her foot crossed the border from grass to plank, and they led her over to talk to a boy lying uncomfortably on a solid-looking bed. he gave her a confident smile.

it was strange waking up and knowing the whole glade was aware of her existence, her name, her story; yet she could only just muster the names of half of them. every pair of eyes was set on her as she went about her day and there was nothing she could do about it. no escape. and she supposed that was what scared her the most.

"hey greenie," he looked up at her and spoke. she noticed a large gash across his torso, his bloody shirt rolled up to expose it, and almost turned around to run straight back outside. the red splattered across his stomach made lyn want to throw up right then and there, but her better judgment caused her to compose herself and inhale deeply before turning back to him and asking what his name was.

"rhys." he replied.

she recognised him as one of gally's builders. he looked around fourteen or fifteen, probably on the younger side of the gladers, and had medium-toned skin with dark, curly hair. he was very pretty, lyn observed, and didn't have a single flaw on his body (with the exception of the cut above his bellybutton).

clint and jeff weren't paying the pair's conversation any consideration as they fumbled in a stained bag for some bandages they couldn't seem to find, so lyn decided to keep talking to rhys. he intrigued lyn; had a sort of mysterious side to him she was attracted to. and there wasn't any point pursuing anything with minho, so that was a lost cause.

"i'm not really sure what to do, to be honest, but how did you manage to get..." she motioned towards his injury, an eye-sore she couldn't prevent herself glancing down at, "that?"

he laughed. "this? i've had worse. this time i was building like normal, then some careless shank whacked me with a tool. they told me i fainted, but i don't recall anything really. come to think of it, you nearly cut my arm clean off just the other day. remember?"

oh no, she thought. the was the boy she'd near amputated a matter of days prior. they smiled at each other laughing: one's was a genuine laugh, the other's was to cover up the embarrassment she was feeling. it wasn't hard to tell which was which.

"here!" lyn heard clint exclaim behind her. he trotted back over with a long strip of fabric in hand, and started patching up rhys' gash. deciding to have a try at being helpful, lyn grabbed a clean, khaki shirt for the boy as he pulled off the old bloodied one. he winked at her as he did so.

exactly as minho did.

and then she realised she had no feeling but ice cold nothingness towards the boy she was stood by now, no matter how kind or attractive he was.

the only boy she could love was the one she couldn't, the one she shouldn't, the one she wouldn't — but she would, and wouldn't stop until she knew he felt the same.

and then she turned and ran to find newt.