What The Future Holds

Chapter 6 : Go. Went. Gone.

The answer!
She gasped. Her hands unknowingly loosened itself from his.
Somewhere she felt happy that she finally got an answer. She had been wondering, questioning,thinking and eating her brains out on this for the past 2 years.
But siddharth said no. Did he really say no? Did i hear it right? I have to make sure.

"Say it again siddharth" Her voice quivered.

"NO SHEHNAZ, I DONT! I DONT LOVE YOU !"

This time shehnaz knew he wasn't joking, or running away. He was serious. And he said it right to her face.
More questions formed in her mind.
So many why's and what's and how's.
But whats the point anyway . He said he doesnt love me.
But she did tell him not to worry about her getting hurt. So she decided to speak up.

"See, thats all you had to do. I deserved to know it, so i asked ,thats it"

I'm such a good actor, i should get an oscar for this.
She thought she might loose her voice, seem feeble, loose control and cry right then and there but for some reason she sounded fine.
He was still giving her a death stare.

"Now that you've got you're answer are you happy now? "

"I am "

"Good for you"

"Thankyou"

By far this was the weirdest conversations they've ever had. Right now ,Siddharth and shehnaz were in a staring competiton.
They were looking at each others eyes,to see what the other one was truly feeling,searching,for answers that only the eyes can give, something, anything.
After what seemed like hours, siddharth finally gave up, he walked towards the door, stopped, threw the keys at her, and said,

"You can stay as long as you want , im leaving, i have work. Im already late. Just make sure you lock the doors when you leave"

Thank god. She really was hoping he would leave. She wanted to cry. But only after he leaves. She can't let him see her cry. She said she is happy with the answer. Just hold on. A little longer. You can do it.

Suddenly he turned back and walked briskly towards her, held her arms tight and pushed her closer to him. At some point she thought he might kiss her.
But he didnt.

"Shehnaz, you know im doing this for you right? You know how deeply i care for you right? This is for you're own good.
You are so weak and tired, look at yourself, and even though you wouldn't admit it , i know its because of me. I am hurting you and hanging around with me all the time will only hurt you more. This is why i said take a break. Go somewhere. Go home, to Punjab. See your mom
It might seem hard for you in the beginning but with time you'll learn to deal with it."

She wanted to ask will you be able to deal with it? Will it be easy for you? To live without shehnaz. Without hearing my voice? Without our fights? 
Ofcourse he'll be fine. What are you thinking shehnaz. He is siddharth shukla. What does a girl like you mean to him.

"Say something shehnaz" He said softly.

"Okay"

"Huh"

"Fine"

"Shehna-" Wait.
Did she really say fine? He couldn't really beleive that shehnaz agreed on something that he said, she never does,atleast not so quickly. He thought he will have to call his assistant , reschedule all his work, cancel plans , because she will start crying , make a whole scene out of it and ruin both of their days. They've both had similar fights before, but this time he was seriously, serious and she must be too. So just to be sure, still holding on to her hands, he said,

"Shehnaz this time im -"

"I know, i get it"

"Really?"

"Yes. Ill go to Punjab. After all I do miss amma, it will do good for me."

"Very good shehnaz. You'll see, you'll thank me later" He smiled.

He was calm now. Relieved that he wont have to explain more on this.
She saw it too.
Relieved? He really is relieved knowing that im going away.
She couldn't take her eyes off him. If she really is taking a break,for who knows how long, she is going to miss him. So she better use these last few seconds rightly. So she never took her eyes off him.
Looking at his watch, he hugged her tightly, kissed on her forehead, and then hugged her again. He walked towards the door, for the third time now,( 😂 sorry about that)

"Have fun", he said and left.

Go. Went . Gone.

She ran towards the window to see him in the parking lot. A few seconds ,and she found him, a tall handsome man, with a slight tilt in his head. He was already on his phone now. Not even a bit of pain or regret on his face. Not a worry in the world. She watched him get in the car and leave.
Finally, i can cry now.
Tears trickled down her cheeks, at first a few drops and then her eyes turned into waterfalls. She sat in his sofa and cried her heart out. Taking her phone,she texted ken,
'Can you please book me a ticket to Punjab'.