The Secrets That Free Us

Chapter 30

My dad was sat in his armchair giving me a reassuring smile even though he had no idea what he was reassuring me of.

My Mom fussed around making sure no one wanted a snack or a drink.

Joey sat on the floor, Cody playing with his toy truck beside him.

Mia and Parker were sat on the sofa, Parker's leg was bouncing and they were both exchanging confused glances every now and then.

Cole stood in the doorway, I spoke to him when he first arrived and he gave me his full support but I could feel the nerves coming off of him in waves.

I sat on the other armchair trying to control my breather while Hunter sat on the arm of the same chair with a comforting arm around my shoulder.

This was it. Now or never. Not literally but if I don't spit it out now I don't think i'll ever have the bottle to do this again.

I looked around the room at my family, they all came this evening because I asked. Because I needed them.

They're all I'll ever need and I wish I had of seen that sooner.

I cleared my throat, "Okay, um I don't really know how to start this so thanks for coming." I began before Joey cut me off.

"Is this some kind of acceptance speech? Or like a coming out speech? Cos it's totally cool if you're a lesbian."

"Really? I told you it was totally cool if you were a lesbian so why are you still hiding in the closet Joe?" Mia shot back with a smirk.

"Actually we're together now, so Grace isn't a lesbian." Hunter added before leaning into my ear so only I could hear, "you aren't, are you?"

I gave him a what-the-fuck look before turning back towards everyone else.

"Will you dickheads shut up and stop interrupting. Grace obviously wants to tell us something." Parker said. It's not like him to be the voice of reason.

Everyone shut up and the mood in the room suddenly deflated again. I decided to rip it off like a band aid.

"I wasn't being mean saying no partners to come tonight, it's just hard enough to say this to all of you never mind three more people. I know you guys all wanted to be there for me and help me after I ..You know.. but I wasn't ready to talk about it. I realised I won't ever be but I can't keep living in denial like it never happened."

Everyone's eyes were on me, waiting for the explanation they so desperately craved. Hunter found my hand with his own and gave it a squeeze. I don't know if that was more for me or for him right now.

"I um.. I..this is harder than I thought"

I screw my eyes closed and let out another breath, "2 years ago I was raped."

I leave the words hanging in the air. Like a thick black smoke suffocating us all.

My mom shuffled backwards towards my dad, collapsing onto the arm of the chair.

My Dad's showing no emotion, I'm not sure if he's processed what I just said.

Mia's hand flies to her mouth and I can see the tears welling in her eyes.

Cole puts his head down, guilt washing over him.

Joey looks like he might puke and Parker looks ready to murder someone.

"How?" Mia chokes on the word as it comes out of her mouth.

Hunter rubs his thumb in soft circles on the back of my hand.

I open my mouth to speak but Cole speaks before I get the chance, "It was my fault. There was no one staying at home except me and Grace, I threw a party and one of the assholes that came went into Gracies room."

Before anyone can process what's happening Parker has moved across the room and is planting his fist into Cole's jaw before rugby tackling him to the ground. Cole doesn't even defend himself.

"You selfish bastard I knew this had something to do with you!" Parker yelled.

"It's not his fault!" I scream over the commotion as Mia and Joey try to pry Parker from Cole and Hunter pulls me to his chest.

My Dad is the one who puts an end to the commotion. He strides over to his sons in a purposeful motion and pulls Parker from Cole with a strength I didn't know he had. Parker tries to advance towards Cole again but my Dad holds a hand out in front of him to stop him.

Only now has the shock left his face, his ageing cheeks are red with anger. A vein in his neck pulsing furiously with his anger. I've never noticed how a like him and Cole are until now.

"Do you think it was easy for Grace to stand here in-front of all of us and say that without you two morons having a pissing contest over who can throw the hardest god damn punch?!" My Dad's voice started out calm but by the end it was louder than I ever remember hearing it.

He looks at me, "Grace, sweetheart, do you blame Cole?" His tone gentle.

The pain in his eyes makes me look away from him, "No. Cole's done nothing but be there for me." I tell them all.

"Grace is the only one who has any right to lay blame, not us. This isn't on Cole." My Dad tells him.

"Yeah, well why not tell any of us?" Parker yells still furious. His cold gaze turns to Hunter, "and what about you shithead? You know about this?"

"This isn't his fault either Parker." I tell him with tears streaming down my face. I knew this wouldn't be easy but I didn't expect it to go this tits up.

"I asked them both not to tell anyone. They respected what I wanted, don't be mad at them." I plead with him.

"Parker, you need to calm down. They were doing what Grace asked of them." My Mom tries to intervene, her voice small.

"Yeah that worked out great didn't it. She's hardly fucking spoke to anyone since this happened apart from him" he points at Cole. "And he fucked off and left her to deal with this her self like the dick head we all know he is." He points at Hunter.

He turns to face me, his face and words are angry but his eyes are pained, "and she tried to fucking kill herself. Great plan guys."

"Parker I get your pissed but you don't know shit about why I left. And don't fucking speak to Grace like that." Hunter's patience is wearing thin along with everyone else's.

Everyone was arguing amongst themselves before Mia finally spoke up, "WILL EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

The room went silent and all eyes went to my sister.

"Dad's right. It took Grace a hell of a lot of guts to tell us this and you fucking animals are making the entire situation traumatic for her, no wonder she didn't tell anyone. Parker, I get your pissed I want to find that motherfucker and castrate him myself. But right now you're being selfish. This isn't about you, we need to be here for our sister. You said it yourself we all wanted to know what was going on, now we know. If you don't like the truth imagine how Grace feels. So sit down, shut the fuck up and listen to her, then when she's done give her a hug like a supportive big brother. Other wise I will throw you out of this house myself and that goes for all of you." She sends a warning glare to Cole and Hunter as well.

Mia squeezes beside me on the armchair and takes my hand in hers, "Tell us what happened Grace."