The Secrets That Free Us

Chapter 15

"So what do you think brought these dreams on?" Dr Blaylock asks me as she sits in her chair across from me, writing notes on her notepad.

Her office is a typical therapist office, plain walls full of diplomas, a big desk and filing cabinets and her brown leather chair opposite the material sofa I'm currently sitting on.

"I don't know, the new meds maybe?"

"Perhaps, but there has to be something subconsciously causing you to face criticism like that in your dream." She looks at me patiently and I just shrug my shoulders.

I want to tell her that maybe it's because I know what a massive fuck up and disappointment I am to them all, but I don't want another ten sessions based on my self loathing.

We discuss school, and Hunter, and the project with Hunter and before I know it my times up.

"See you next week Grace." Dr Blaylock gives me a warm smile.

"Next week? I usually see you on Saturday too?"

"I have a feeling your going to find yourself busy with this project for now, I think we'll be okay keeping it to Monday and Wednesday for now. You have my number, call if you need me."

I see Cole's car parked across the street as I come out of the building. I look both ways before crossing the street but just as I near Cole's Audi another car comes flying around the corner, just missing me.

The driver is a scruffy looking man in his mid thirties, "Watch where you're fucking going, stupid bitch." He says as he blares his horn. As if it's my fault he flew around a corner at 30mph, he's lucky he didn't hit me. I will my feet too move but I'm frozen to the spot, I guess I'm lucky he has quick reflexes.

It happens in slow motion, I see the black audi door fly open and someone come charging towards the blue wagon that almost hit me.

The drivers door is almost ripped off it's hinges as the angry guy drags the driver out of the car by his collar and punches him, causing blood to splatter everywhere.

By the time I come to my senses I realise the driver is on the floor with the angry guy on top of him, but now I realise that angry guy is actually Cole.

"You could of killed her you fucking moron" he yells as he punches him in the face repeatedly.

"Cole!" I try to yell for him but he's zoned out. I want to look away, the drivers face is now covered in blood and I realise Cole isn't going to stop.

My feet finally move as I race towards them and try to pull Cole off of the man.

He eventually pulls back and his chest is moving up and down rapidly. He looks at me and his eyes are ablaze with anger, just like they where in my dream. That alone causes me to flinch away from him and his face instantly softens. I realise I'm crying now.

We hear sirens and I pull Cole towards his car. He pulls away from the curb and once we round the corner he pulls back over, obviously not trusting himself to drive in this state.

He slams his fist against his steering wheel, "Fuck!" He yells and I jump in my seat. I don't know how to be around Cole when he's this angry, I don't know what to say, so I stay silent.

After a few moments of clenched fists and deep breaths he finally starts calming down and starts the engine back up.

"Are you okay?" He asks, breaking the silence. I don't trust my voice right now so I just nod.

"Fuck, I'm sorry Grace I just, he could have hit you and, fuck I already let you down once. I just saw red. I didn't mean to scare you."

After a few moments of silence to collect my thoughts I finally find my voice.

"You don't need to protect me all of the time. You have never let me down Cole, you've always been exactly who I needed you to be but your anger is too much. You need to see someone." I tell him sternly but softly. He nods his head in agreement even though I know he won't.

We pull up outside my house and he leaves his engine running, "Don't tell Mom please. She worries enough." I give him a small nod and exit his car.

I need to find some way to help him stop blaming himself.

I walk into the kitchen and greet Coco, when I go into the living room I see my Mom, Dad, Joey, Brooke and baby Cody.

"Hi" I say in greeting.

I expect Joey to make some ill timed joke, his sense of humour can be dark at times but no one takes offence, it's just how Joey is.

But instead he avoids all eye contact with me, his face sullen. He doesn't look as young or as care free as he usually does.

"Hey Grace" Brooke greets me with a warm smile.

"Hi sweetheart, how was you're session?" My Mom asks me.

"It was okay."

"Well Mom, we better get going now." Joey says and starts gathering Cody's baby bag, still not acknowledging my presence. He must be really pissed about Cody's christening.

"Oh but you just got here. Grace sweetie do you want me to make you something to eat?" My Mom asks me.

"Actually I have to go and work on that project with Hunter, I'll be at his place." I mutter dejectedly.

I turn and leave the room before she can argue and before I can talk myself out of it.

I need to be around someone who isn't walking on egg shells with me and isn't a ticking time bomb of rage,
or mad at me.

I knock on the front door and wait for an answer.

When the door opens Eva looks taken aback for a moment before a smile erupts on her face, "Grace, darling! How are you?" She pulls me into the house and closes the door behind me.

I've always like Eva, she's not much taller than me and has a short brown bob that is always styled perfectly. Her blue eyes remind me of her son and she always has a smile and kind words for me.

"I'm fine thank you Eva, is um, is Hunter here?" I ask before I loose my nerve.

"He's in the shower at the moment but feel free to go up and wait for him." She gives me a loving smile and ushers me towards the stairs.

I walk into Hunter's bedroom and take it in. It's exactly the same. Navy blue walls and all black furniture. It's been freshly painted though, probably because of the posters of girls in bikinis that used to litter his walls leaving tac marks.

I stand awkwardly looks around and notice the photo frame on his bedside table, it's an old photo of the both of us. I can't believe he's kept it all this time.

What am I even doing here? I threw him under the bus at lunch and now I'm in his bedroom like some kind of creepy stalker.

I turn to leave and collide with a hard surface. A hard, warm, wet surface.

The surface puts it's hands on my shoulders to steady me, that surface would be Hunter. In nothing but a towel hanging low on his hips and water still dripping down his torso. I definitely wasn't wrong about the toned abs.