Luke's POV
I felt like a total asshole.
Scratch that.
I am the biggest asshole.
I can't believe myself.
I shouldn't be here, holding her right now in my room.
This is still eating at me and I can't take it anymore.
How could I tell her that?
How could I promise her that?
Even when I knew I couldn't keep it.
I promised her I'd spend every summer day with her, when in reality I don't even know if I'll be here for her birthday. It's been four fucking days since I promised her that. Time is fucking flying by and I can't stop it. I want to stop it, I wish I could stop it, I need to stop it.
I need more time with her.
5 months away from her?
How the fuck am I going to tell her?
...do I even tell her?
Of course I fucking tell her, Luke you stupid ass.
It was about 7 am and I haven't slept at all. She definitely knows something is up too, there's no way she doesn't know. She's so smart, and beautiful and god I'm completely wrapped around her finger. The way her cute little nose curves up. The way her lips are full but they aren't too big or too thin, not to mention how soft they are. The way her eyes twinkle, even how cliche that sounds and how unrealistic but I swear they twinkle more then stars, fuck that more then the sun. Her eyes are brighter then the sun. They light up my day every time I see them. The way her eyebrows raise a little when she talks. How her eyelashes are so long and thick how she doesn't use make up on them anymore. I mean don't get me wrong, she looked gorgeous with make up but I think she looks absolutely breath taking without it. How she sings aloud whenever a song comes on that she likes. How when she plays guitar her eyes are so relaxed and she just looks at a complete peace of mind state. I never want her to be stressed, ever, I never want her to be sad either. The only feeling she should ever feel, is happy and it's crushing me that one day coming up I will be the one to make her sad. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself and I'm preparing myself for the worst. Anyway, I know it's only been four months but I love every single god damn thing about her. Even the way she changed her hair style, she's never boring. That's what I love about her, everything she does is always a change and she's always up for new things. When I first met her, I was such a dick to her. I was so wrapped up in myself and I was so wrapped up in my past shitty relationship where the girl cheated on me. I despised woman for a good time, I believed they all were going to break my heart. I don't even know what I was thinking anymore because now I have Juliet, and I'm determined to be her Romeo. Mostly because, I think I'm in love with her.
She started stirring.
"Luke stop mumbling." She yawned. Moving her finger up to my lips. I chucked at her half asleep half awake state.
"Sh baby go back to sleep," I kissed her head.
"Sing..." she drifted off cuddling deeper into my side. I thought for awhile on what to sing and finally decided with a new song we've been working on.
Life's a tangled web
Of cell phone calls and hashtag I-don't-knows
And you you're so caught up
In all the blinking lights and dial tones
I admit I'm a bit of a victim in the worldwide system too
