My Promise To You

7

Clay's POV

I had laughed so much with George and my stomach was so filled with butterflies that I texted my girlfriend to come over. I was really scared that she was going to get mad at me, but I didn't want to fake a relationship for any longer. I genuinely thought I liked her at first, but I never felt anything for her like I did for George.

Hannah texted me back that she could come over and I was sitting on my bed. Nerves were rushing through my body and I was sure she would get mad at me, I understood if she would get mad. I would break up with her after years, just because I was gay and I only liked boys. I hoped she wouldn't feel betrayed, I genuinely thought I liked her.

It was around twenty minutes later when I heard footsteps on the stairs and Hannah came into my room. She smiled at me and sat down on the bed. 'What's wrong? Why did you want me to come so suddenly?'

I took a deep breath, my stomach was hurting and I was nauseous because of the nerves.

'You seem nervous, are you okay?'

I shrugged. 'I have to tell you something, but I'm so scared you are going to get so mad at me.'

'I won't get mad at you.'

'But you don't know what it is yet.'

'Still, I won't get mad at you.'

I sighed deeply. 'I uh- we- I can't continue this relationship anymore,' I whispered. 'I'm sorry.'

'You're breaking up with me?' Hannah asked. She still didn't sound mad.

I sighed deeply and nodded my head slowly.

'Can I know the reason behind that?' she asked with a sweet smile on her face. 'It's fine, Clay. I'm not mad at you.' She grabbed my hand and rubbed her thumb over the top of it.

'I uh- I have feelings for someone,' I whispered. 'Someone else.'

'That's fine, I'm glad you've broken up with me instead of cheating on me,' Hannah smiled.

'B-but I'm uh- in love with uh- a b-boy, I'm uh- g-gay. I'm sorry.'

Hannah smiled a lot and gave me a hug. 'Oh my gosh, I'm so proud of you.'

'Aren't you mad at me?' I whispered.

'Of course I'm not mad at you, you can't help it. I don't mind it at all.'

'But-.'

'Clay, I don't want a relationship with you when you're gay. I want you to be happy and you're not going to be happy with me, because I'm a girl.'

'You've made me really happy though and I have always thought I had feelings for you, but I guess those were friendly feelings.'

Hannah nodded and wrapped her arm around my shoulders. 'Same for me, our relationship has always been more friendly.'

I nodded slowly. 'I was so scared to tell you that, but I fell in love with a boy and I didn't want to lie to you.'

'Who did you fall in love with? George?'

'How would you know?'

'I already knew,' she smiled. 'I already knew you were falling for George and I suspected you being gay too.'

'I'm sorry,' I whispered. 'I didn't want to fall in love with him, but it went way faster than I ever expected to fall in love with someone. I was at his place today and there was a lot of tension between us. I just wanted to make sure to break up with you before I would do something stupid.'

'I'm really glad you did tell me, can I tell you something too?'

'Of course.'

'I might find Olivia pretty cute,' Hannah giggled.

My head lifted up and I looked at her. 'Do you like girls?'

'I don't know if I'm honest. I really liked you too, so if I like girls I'm not lesbian. I honestly don't really care much if it's a girl or a boy.'

'Are you bisexual or pansexual?'

Hannah shrugged. 'I might be.'

I giggled. 'Do you actually accept me being gay?'

'How can I not accept that? Sure, I liked you and I wouldn't have minded to be in a relationship with you still, but it's not going to work out if you're gay.'

'I'm sorry.'

'No need to say sorry, you can't change who you like and George is an amazing guy.'

'I haven't been faking our relationship, I just thought I liked you. What I felt for you were just friendly feelings and what I feel for George is love. You're an amazing friend and I would love to stay friends with you.'

'I would love to stay friends too, I really hope that you and George get together.'

I giggled shyly. 'Do you?'

'Yes.'

'I hope Olivia and you get together too,' I giggled. 'Olivia came out as lesbian a long while ago, I was at the LGBTQ+ group of the school today and she was there, saying that she is lesbian.'

'When is the group?'

'Tuesday and Thursday.'

'Can I come too?'

'Of course you can,' I smiled.

'I will come Thursday then,' she smiled. 'And don't worry about it anymore now, okay? I'm not mad at you and I support you with my whole heart. We are still friends and I hope you will find a boy.'

I smiled and hugged her. 'I'm still sorry though, but I guess you're right. I've told you as soon as I realised and I can't change my feelings.'

'You can't change them,' Hannah nodded and she hugged me back tightly. 'I still care so much about you.'

I smiled. 'I care about you too.'

We broke the hug and she giggled. 'I knew you liked George,' she smiled.

'Was it that obvious?'

'I mean, I caught you staring quite some times and you smiled and blushed all the time.'

'I just feel a weird feeling in my stomach as soon as I look at him and I just want to hold him all day.'

'You're so in love,' Hannah giggled.

I rolled my eyes. 'I just like him.'

'Pfft, sure. You believe that, but I know better.'

I rolled my eyes. 'Fine, I might be in love, but I just know him.'

'Love at first sight is a real thing.'

I giggled. 'I guess.'

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