Loving You Clumsily [BRIGHTWIN]

6. Do that again

Bright was lying on his bed. And no earthquake or storm or Win could make him come out of his self pity right now. Now, call him dramatic but he was devastated. Totally, completely, irreversibly. Everybody got to know about his feelings last night and Win was, much to his distaste, one of them. He kept reciting his words like a madman, ....escape with me..thank you...all the other nights...NO, it was fine. It was very formal. It was just a tiny, little, unbothered and indifferent gesture to thank anybody for anything. There was nothing special, no confession...kill me somebody, he thought. He remembered how he almost cried out of overwhelming realisation of spilling everything so effortlessly to everybody. He could only make shrill hummings from his throat when they asked him if he liked Win. Bright's eyes were filled with tears and his lips were in a sad, hopeless pout. Fortunately, his asshole friends asked everybody to leave him alone and he just walked silently out of the farm, without even taking a peek at Win. He was that embaressed. But that moment was only the beginning of his sulkiness. It was late afternoon the next day and he hadn't even come out of his room. Only his grandma and mae were allowed to meet him.

"You must really love Grace a lot." His grandma said, "ever since she has left..."

Bright sighed, how did he end up like this?

"It's not funny grandma."

"So what happened exactly?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay", his grandma said while caressing his hair gently in her lap. Win had told her everything and said he was really confused and scared why on earth Mr. Bright acted like that. So sad and terrified. Grandma didn't say anything, she herself wasn't sure. Perhaps, because before this, Bright had never felt anything like this and it was all new and intimidating to him. She just patted her grandson in silence waiting for him to burst out again.

"But seriously, I hate them so much. I hate myself so much. Why did I cry? Why am I like this? It wasn't even his birthday."

"Who's birthday my child? At least tell me what happened?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay."

And then again,

"I ended things with Grace. I broke it up with Joss. I messed it up with Win. I'm so stupid."

"Win? As in Aripin's son? Isn't he Phukong's friend? That Win?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it."

"Bright stop this already..tell me what happened."

Bright was startled by his grandma's annoyed tone. He looked up and pouted.

"Great. Now you hate me too. I hate me too. Win hates me too..."

"Nobody hates you my son..what happened."

Bright sighed and buried his head in her lap again.

"I don't want to talk ab...."

"Bright!"

They heard an impatient knock on the door and an even more impatient voice of Mrs. Fern. As Bright opened the door, her mother closed the door behind her and sat on the bed. Her face was red and afraid.

"What happened mae?"

"Bright..tell me honestly. Are you really gay?"